Third Place -- #4
Second Place -- #9
First Place -- #5

Hot!!!
 

Third place - #5
Reason - It takes a special lady to front 450cc cannons.

Second place - #3 Those eyes...those doggy style eyes.

First place - #10 Perfection! This island coconut has the perfect eyes, perfect smile, did I mention bra-less tube-top!

#10 hottest of the hot!

DB OUT!
 

Bronze- #10 DB OUT! is right those eyes are the pinnacle of perfection. They suck you in and won’t let you go. My Zeus, I would disappoint her all night long.
Silver- #5 Those ample, fertile, milk containers…. yum
Gold- I hope Blackhorse candidates are accepted because I gotta say “Pocahontas”. I believe you will find her in your archives under, I think “Retro-Douche”. She makes my elbows sweat.

Sincerely,
DOUCHEZILLA
 

Bronze #10, Silver #8, Gold #5 (and that's only gold 'cause it doesn't really go any further... I'd give chica #5 platinum... hell, I'd give her einsteinium, plutonium and palladium all at once!!!

"L' Douchebago Venezolano"
 

Third place: #6 – This girl reminds me of my wife a lot. Except my wife doesn’t have the sultry seduction eyes, the perfect complexion of an airbrushed model, a sexy tan, nor would she ever be willing to put on the naughty nurse outfit. But I can just imagine this little hottie would absolutely prefer to watch Dawson’s Creek reruns late night on TNT rather than have sex with me, just like my wife.

Second place: #1 – The only thing keeping this face of perfection from being my number one choice is the fact that I can’t see her body. She has the face of an angel, gorgeous dark skin, big sexy peepers, and a smile that melts me. But, as far as I know she could be rocking a foot with seven toes, and be missing her right arm, and damn it, I’m just not cool with that. I’m a shallow, shallow douche bag, I know.

First place: #9 – That fact that this tasty cupcake of love resembles Nicole Eggert from Charles in Charge is enough to put her at number one in my book. But, what truly puts her over the top is my assumption that if she’s willing to make like Juvenile and back that ass up to this mullet wearing douche, than I should have a really good chance with her. Sure, I’m a douche too, but I sport a normal hair-cut, I shave, and I shower at least once a week. So come on over sexy, and we’ll watch Alf on DVD all night long. Bring your gin & tonic too, it’s cool. Just leave this douche and his Camero there.
 

Third Place -- # 4

Second Place -- #6 Gotta love the French Maid

First Place -- #10 I would screw her mouth for a onemonth.
 

#3/#4 gets my vote...and what's up with #8's Toucan Sam-nose?
 

Third Place - #3
Second Place - #9
First Place - #4

Outstanding chicas.
 

Third Place: #9
Second Place: #6
First Place: #10

Tally ho!

-Iowa Bagslayer
 

third - #10
second - #6

first - #9. Delicious.

Honorable mention to #5 for the massive jugs.
 

Win = 5
Place = 10
Show = 6
 

10, 4, 5, 1, 9, 3, 2, 6, 7, 8
 

Pi has been reading for awhile and now feels she must vote...

For third place I had a really hard time deciding between Big Boob Blondie and Naughty #3. Naughty #3 looks like my kinda gal...I'd be buried in that for hours, she looks like the type that would be up for some experimenting...I digress...Big Boob Blondie gets third, cuz those are some fantastic fun-bags.

Second place goes to Delicious #4. She looks so sweet, love that smile and her eyes.

First, #10. Cuz she's a 10. Der. I love that 'Aren't I cute smile' like she doesn't know there's a hint of nipple poking out...yummmm

(her hairy looking earring bothers me though)

So 3rd: #5
2nd: #4
1st: #10
 

9 is hottest but airbrushed plastic, 2 is next natural with natural expression, and third place is 8
 

Same a sprevious guy except actually 10 is best
 

Oh the choices involved with this scrumpdeleicious mess of hotties with scrote baggage. Where to start?

I think I have to go with #5 as the hottest because I have a strange affinity for huge cans and she's all out there guns a blazin'. Her scrote isn't too baggy - but a tongue bag is a tongue bag.

Second place has to go to #9 because she has got to be the hottest chick I've ever seen with such an ugly, ugly douchebag. This guy is so ugly he's almost beyond douchey - nearly falling into the barfbag category.

Finally - the bronze medal winner is little hotty #6 who places third because she's hot and because she's with Secret Asian Man.
 

first place: #10 (by FAR!)
second place: #4
third place: #5
 

(1) #4
(2) #6
(3) #10
 

Third -- #6, if only for the maid's outfit.

Second -- #10, my eyes are starting to melt.

First -- #5, nothing better than a big-titted blonde on spring break.
 

I gotta roll with third place is # 2. Second place is # 3. And first place is # 1....

I have no idea what # 7 is doing in there, but looking through the archives, about every hottie is better looking than that doo doo.

Also the Coors light girl is my non-official # 1!!
 

sorry first place is # 6....NOT one
 

Third - #3
Second - #6
First - #10
 

First #5
Second #10
Third #4

#5 is the best I've seen on your site, period. But I think 10 and 4 could be replaced with some others you've posted in the last 3 months.

Funny site, dude! Keep it going.
 

All these lovely gals make me feel a bit inferior, with the cuteness factor being so high. Props to DB1 for his excellent selections.

Third: #7 I love her little angelic smile and fabulous shampoo-commercial hair. Plus she's rockin some garters. You just know she wears a plaid uniform to school, then changes into sassy purple outfit for Secret Asian Man (credit to doucheholio for the funniest thing of these comments).

Second: #5 Cuz I gots to give the love for my large chested sisters. Baby, I got the indentations on my shoulders too. You go on with your big busty self.
(Plus, she has a beautiful white smile. Funny, no one has pointed that out yet.)

First: #2 For some reason, I'd just like to party with this girl. She seems like a good time. I'd be her friend and we would drink Guinness together and openly antagonize douches. Cuz that would be how we role.

xo
kitty ledouche
 

Third Place - #6
Second Place - #10
First Place - #5

I would happily bang all of them....of course, that says very little. #5's boobies make me happy.
 

(sorry i was too busy to post yesterday)

i hope my choices result in hurt feelings (yeah that's right HURT FEELINGS!) for at least 7 of the hotties, because that at least means they care about what i think.

photo-wise:

hottie #4 for third place. i likes me some great smiles.

hottie #10 for second place. i likes me some great smiles AND more revealing apparel.

hottie #8 hottie for first place. i likes me some great smiles AND more revealing apparel AND comfortably sized breasts.

oh yeah and i hope all you other hotties have HURT FEELINGS! yeah that's right! HURT FEELINGS!

lastly i'd also like to say that Sewer Sausage & Pocahontas can easily make my choices a lot more difficult (in a good way of cousre) if the photo made the cut. NOT because of sewer sausage, but that should be fairly obvious.
 

3rd place #3
2nd place #6
1st place #4
 

Third #4
Second #10
First #5
 

Note #6 was in the running but quickly ruled out as I simply can not excuse that pile of poo on her right.
 

Tough choice between #5 and #9. It's a toss up but I gotta go with #5 just because of the juggs.
 

third- #4
second- #6
first- #10 (is that douche she's with the bad guy from the movie "Hackers"? He got fat)
 

hey.. well here's a chick's opinion

third place #2.. not that she's really super hot, but she's pretty and she seems to be the only one who realises what a complete douche she's with, so she gets a vote

second place #4

first place #10
 

First place: #4
Second place: #10
Distant third: #6
 

Third Place: Nine
Second Place: Four
First Place: Ten
 

Two, Seven and Eight do not belong on this list. The one pictured with me looks better.

Signed,

Stenchy The Stenchball
 

OK...I'll start with my top three of the choices here. I should mention that in the case of pictures that don't show much below the neck it's more rating them on cuteness than hotness. Anyway the choices (besides #1, which I thought was clear) were tough!

3rd place: #1

2nd place: #5

1st place: #10

#3 was almost in the running, and she seems kinda hot but I just can't tell. #4 just reminds me too much of an anorexic Olsen twin. #6 is certainly hot but I prefer a more innocent look and this French maid is intimidating. #7 seems pretty cute but ultimately lost out because of the poor picture quality.

Now...I can't just leave it at that. Like some others have before me, I had to check all the archives to make sure there weren't any hotties that I felt were unjustly snubbed. I agree with Douchezilla that "Pocahontas" really should have been a finalist--her proximity to the Douchebags Only jacket 'bag makes the photo especially upsetting.

Other honorable mentions go out to: the dark haired beauty with "The Foot 'Bag," the chick getting groped in "PopoZao," and possibly my all time favorite HCwDB hottie, the girl on the right in "Spring Break Inverted 'Bag Sandwich." It's a shame those multi-girl pics weren't allowed in...

Just thought I'd also mention that by revisiting the archives I noticed that the blonde we all know from "Mellonhead" was actually first on the site back in April pictured with "The Joker"!
 

Third place - # 9
Second place - # 5
First place - # 7

Bagbalm
 

3rd=10
2nd=10
1st=10
 

Here's my rankings:

1-10
2-1
3-5

...although I wouldn't toss any of these girls out of bed for chewing crackers. In fact, I wouldn't toss these girls out of bed if they had entire sleeves of ritz crackers jammed into their mouths and crumbs were cascading out of their nostrils.
 

Third: Hottie #9. Ma'am, I'd grow a mullet just to smell the perfume evaporate from your neck.

Second: Hottie #4. Avril Lavigne's hot older sister, I will drive all the way to Canada just to rescue you from this double-douchebag sandwich.

First: Hottie #10. Dear Sweetie: you worked so hard to achieve that warm sunset tan. Your eyes sparkle with the intrigue of 1,000 desert nights. So why, oh why, are you risking a Bleeth infection by even acknowledging this Ron Jeremy look alike? Run, run into the night, and I will come get you in my private douchebag helicopter!

Think about it.
 

I'm voting for # 10 again.....cuz I luv 'er!

Did wan't to give honorable mention to Pocahontas and the Hippie chick from the Mellonhead AND Joker posts.
I found both of those pics on the same web site.
If all y'all bags are fans of "hippie chick", say the word and DB OUT shall deliver.

Peace!
 

Third Place-6
Second Place-3
First Place-10
 

3rd: #6
You had me at maid...

2nd: #4
That's the most delicious piece of meat I've ever seen in between a bag andwich

1st: #10
Holy douchy hell! The things I wouldn't do are few and far between. What is that in the middle of her boobs? I don't know, but I sure would give it a very, very close inspection.

T Bag
 

Third: 5
Second: 4
First: 10
 

hottie number five gets my number one vote. egads, the lungs on that chika, and that smile has blinded me....I'm afraid I can't even see the rest of the hotties, although I remember wanted to cuddle under a warm blanket at number one's feet. Best of luck to the other voters, just watch out for number five's smile, she is too much to handle.
 

I've just concluded my presentation and am rewarded with a plethora of hotties. The hottest of the hotties. Thanks, DB1. I think there are some hotties missing here, but I don't have time to go thru the archives right now. I guess I'll just analyzse these pics.

Hottie #1
This girlie definitely does it for me. Reminds me of a hottie I went to college with. And she wasn't a stuckup bitch hottie. She was one of the coolest girls. With an amazing ass. Also reminds me of a girl I went to high school with. She was the second hottest girl in school. I tried to woo her with an air guitar solo and some ShockTarts. Mission failed.

Hottie #2
I have no attraction towards a retarded Caroline Rhea giving me the finger.

Hottie #3 & #4 (same girl?)
#3 is a definite hottie, but seems a bit Bleethed out. #4 has this Olson twin kinda thing goin on. In a good way. Seems to be less infected with the Bleeth. #4 takes it between these two.

Hottie #5
Blonde
Babe
BOOBS!
Beer
Bag
A very good candidate.

Hottie #6
I might have to stop here. For 45 seconds.

Ahhh, I feel a load lighter.

I see this hottie and the only word that goes thru my head is "sex". Not "sexy". Not "I wanna hit that". Not "I should describe to her the mechanism of transformation of acoustic waves into electrical impulses". I just think "sex". She gets me tingly in the right places. Giving some sexy attitude with that look on her face (I think Hottie #3 was going for the same effect. Didn't work). Love the inner-side boob from that angle. I'm thinking of becoming a true douchebag, just to get a girl like that. But is wearing a douchebag outfit enough to consider someone a douchebag? Or is it something you have to be born with?

Hottie #7
Bleethed out skank. No goods for me. The type of girl with barely decent looks but parades around like a hottie. Looks like some bitch I knew who thought she was the shit. Annoying as fuck. Not hot. I can't believe anyone fucked her. Actually, I can't believe anyone could tolerate talkin to her. That face makes me want to vomit. The chick's face. The bag's face already made me vomit twice.

Wait.

Three times.

Hottie #8
If I wanted to see Big Pussy and Amy Jo Johnson (with Barbara Streisand nose) together, I would have just...

Can't think of anything witty. I'm sure they will appear together on some reality program in the near future. I hate television.

Look at that nose. Wait, look at those tits! Maybe it's an illusion. Or a weird angle. Or maybe she has the capability of nourishing an entire developing country. With her and hottie #5 working together, cows may be out of work.

Hottie #9
Is she hot? I'm undecided. One part of me says yes. Another part of me says that chin belongs with some of the pics from last week. She scares me more than the bag does. If anyone in this pic is a serial killer, it's her. Basic Instinct? Well, even if she's not a killer, she still looks like she can kick my ass.

Hottie #10
I.. I..

Total loss of mental function. Let me recuperate.

I consider hotties as girls I see and the first reaction is "sex" (see Hottie #6). But this girl, she's damn beautiful. I look at her face and life doesn't seem so bad anymore. Even though I live with my grandmother, I have one and a half friends (I met half at a carnival. long story), I haven't had sex since the Giants won the Super Bowl, I wake up with diarrhoea and sleep with constipation everyday, I'm at the risk of losing my job at any moment, I'm surrounded by assholes and ugly bitches all day, I can't afford to see a shrink, I forget what sleep feels like, I'm in severe debt, I don't know which overdose I'm recovering from, and I don't know which overdose is next.

Damn.

So I can't include this one in my voting. She doesn't fit my definition of hottie. She's much more than that. Looking at her doesn't make me think "sex". Looking at her makes me genuinely happy. Keep smilin' baby. If I'm willing to be a douchebag for Hottie #6, I'm willing to be Douchebag of the Millenium for this one.

Results
Third Place - Hottie #4
Seconds Place - Hottie #1
First Place - Hottie #6

Damn. It took about 10 minutes to choose those 3. Actually, it took more time putting them in that particular order. I still think I might have to rearrange it.

Honorable Mention
Hottie #5
Hottie #10 (she's fuckin beautiful. i might have to change my definition of hottie just to include her and give her first, second, and third place. god damn. i think i'm in love. i don't know what love is, but if it's a funny feeling in your pants, then i'm 100% in love. i think I need a towel)

- from bags to bitches
 

Third place- #6
Second place- #1
First place- #10 no contest
 

#3 is third. I wouldn't kick her out of bed if she was eating crackers.

#8 is second. I wouldn't kick her out of bed if she was eating crackers AND a democrat.

#2 is first. I wouldn't kick her out of bed even if she was eating crackers, a democrat, AND a Yankees fan.
 

Third -- 6
Second -- 8 Excellent cleavite and she can stand the greasitude of the Greekbag
First -- 10 Nothing needs to be said.

as to your second question. #3 next to Conan the Douchebag isnt the same HC as the HC in #4 between the Mulletbag twins
 

Foot bag's chica was my favorite, but in this list the juicy casavas of #5 get my vote.
 

I would like to correct my self, if I could be so bold. I miss spoke when I used the term "Blackhorse”, which does not exist unless you mean it literally, which I did not. I should have said "dark horse" which according to my Webster’s New World Dictionary is “a little-unknown contestant though unlikely to win”. See what happens when you try to remember shit you learned in your high school U.S. history class, curse you Franklin Pierce, curse you.
Back to the hotties I would like to recast my votes
Third Place _ Pocahontas
Second Place -Pocahontas
First Place- Pocahontas
I want to start a grass roots campaign to get her (my love) on the ballot and elected. For if she does not win it does a disservice to what we call our democratic system.

Sincerely,
DOUCHEZILLA

write me my love……write me
 

#4 & #10 are the same chick! She's a Swedish model named Sofia Hellqvist. She poses for scrotographs when she's doing promotional work.