Monday, June 11, 2007
JoeyPorsche
And while you're mulling your HCwDB vote, here's a pic from the Zen Transcendence of JoeyPorsche to inspire you.
You can almost see the Grieco Virus jump from douche-lips to douche-lips. 'Bag, 'Bag, 'Bag, Bleethed out Hottie. Very sad.
Joey, Joey, Joey. I try to keep all my pics anonymous, but how do I not feature your greatness on this site?
I humbly bow down to one of the few sourche-douches out there. You transcend, my friend. And your blonde teenage cupcake is perfection.
EDIT: In what may be a first here at HCwDB, the JoeyPorsche experience inspired a reader to create a Tribute Pic in his douchey honor. Let the JoeyPorsche tributes commence, send me your best work and I'll post it on the site. And I'm putting his MySpace directly into the Hall of Scrote. No need for the Weekly for an Ur-Douche that rivals the Holy Grieco Itself.
Comments:
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upon viewing this picture of joey and friends, i laughed out loud. and i still am. uberdouchery. UBER.
why all the puckering? i mean really. why? where does that come from? an allergic reaction to self-tanning lotion? these guys might as well just all wear the same clothes, because they obviously all go to the same hairstylist and eyebrow waxer.
i got you addicted to what the wax did. ya diggggggg????
why all the puckering? i mean really. why? where does that come from? an allergic reaction to self-tanning lotion? these guys might as well just all wear the same clothes, because they obviously all go to the same hairstylist and eyebrow waxer.
i got you addicted to what the wax did. ya diggggggg????
Thank you thank you! I had stopped logging on here, b/c I was feeling things had started to jump the shark, but THIS picture has brought me back! The first one in a few weeks that actually made me roll my eyes and gag when I looked at it!!! Why do these Jersey douches think their hair looks "def" like that???? And PLEASE tell me this was a choreographed douche pout, and they didn't all independently come up with this facial expression?! Oh god,,,,,,,my eyes! MY EYES!!!
I'm telling you, the source douche is too strong in one so young. He's Anaikin SkyDouche. He must be related to Greico.
iDouche
iDouche
# posted by 
: 8:17 AM
: 8:17 AM
Let's let Frank sing one for the LAY-DEEZ! "Ya gotta respect the broads, ya clowns!" A classic cover of the Jobim tune:
The Girl From Massapequa
Young and dumb and oh so Bleethy
The girl from Massapequa keeps talking
And when she pauses, everyone wishes- "stop!"
When she talks, she's such a moron
That blabs so long and says so little
And when she pauses, everyone wishes- "nooo!"
(ooh) And she dresses so badly
Make-up is layered upon her
She's scarier than Boo Radley
But each day, she gets yet more Bleethy
And on her shades, the big "G"
Young, and dumb, and oh, so Bleethy
The girl from Massapequa keeps talking
And when she pauses,
We all want her to die... why won't she just die...
The Girl From Massapequa
Young and dumb and oh so Bleethy
The girl from Massapequa keeps talking
And when she pauses, everyone wishes- "stop!"
When she talks, she's such a moron
That blabs so long and says so little
And when she pauses, everyone wishes- "nooo!"
(ooh) And she dresses so badly
Make-up is layered upon her
She's scarier than Boo Radley
But each day, she gets yet more Bleethy
And on her shades, the big "G"
Young, and dumb, and oh, so Bleethy
The girl from Massapequa keeps talking
And when she pauses,
We all want her to die... why won't she just die...
What the fuck is up with this new "cactus" hair style that all these Growin' Up Gotti douche-lickers are sporting these days. I live in Staten Island and I've never seen the Cactus Population do so well.
Kill me now.
Kill me now.
# posted by : 8:24 AM
: 8:24 AM
You know, the scary part is these douchebags have to try to look douchey. Anyone that fruity looking is a salad tossing homo acting like he's a pimp w/ daddy's money. I wonder what Daddy will do when he comes home to find the chicks have left the party early and douchebag here is having an allout Cleveland steaming Gaydouche fruitfest with his playa wanna be douchebag co-queers.
# posted by : 8:31 AM
: 8:31 AM
Review the Hall of Scrote. Nothing we've seen, no-one to date, never, anywhere, has amassed a douche oeuvre that begins to compare to Joey Fcukin' Carrera's.
He's freaking Douchelangelo. Ab Lobster, Fish Slap; crushed. Dare I suggest?... No, I Assert! Even Cro-Bagnon, #9, the Donk: they are dwarfed.
This kid is the freaking Tiger Woods of douchebaggery.
Even so, the soothsaying of Baron Von G haunts us: 'there is always something worse...'
But how can it be?
--Vinny 'Truly Awestruck' Scumbaglia
He's freaking Douchelangelo. Ab Lobster, Fish Slap; crushed. Dare I suggest?... No, I Assert! Even Cro-Bagnon, #9, the Donk: they are dwarfed.
This kid is the freaking Tiger Woods of douchebaggery.
Even so, the soothsaying of Baron Von G haunts us: 'there is always something worse...'
But how can it be?
--Vinny 'Truly Awestruck' Scumbaglia
# posted by : 8:35 AM
: 8:35 AM
Joey's MySpace is a thing that astounds, offends, nauseates. I've shown it to everybody at work, and it creates an allergic reaction that transcends gender and culture.
EVERYBODY on earth thinks this guy and his friends are douchebags, not just us professionals. That's saying something. Joey and Co. represent a new kind of douche--a cartoonishly creepy, feminized guido-scrote--that eclipses even the douchiness of Grieco.
Grieco is polio; Joey is ebola.
EVERYBODY on earth thinks this guy and his friends are douchebags, not just us professionals. That's saying something. Joey and Co. represent a new kind of douche--a cartoonishly creepy, feminized guido-scrote--that eclipses even the douchiness of Grieco.
Grieco is polio; Joey is ebola.
# posted by : 8:37 AM
: 8:37 AM
This girl is hot as hell and she know's it, but already so so tainted by the profound influence of douchebaggery that she's un datable.
I don't even know if I could get wood knowing she pouted along with these lemon sucking, mexitalian assclowns.
I don't even know if I could get wood knowing she pouted along with these lemon sucking, mexitalian assclowns.
# posted by : 8:38 AM
: 8:38 AM
Massapequa? Another LI ref. Jesus.
I vote Joey go straight to the hall of scrote...
All those in favor say Booooyakasha!
-LOTD
I vote Joey go straight to the hall of scrote...
All those in favor say Booooyakasha!
-LOTD
# posted by : 8:41 AM
: 8:41 AM
Btw, should my myspace name be
Lord Honda, or Lord Accord?
Cause Accord is the actual car I have, It's not like I have a crappy civic or anything.
-Lord of the Douche
Lord Honda, or Lord Accord?
Cause Accord is the actual car I have, It's not like I have a crappy civic or anything.
-Lord of the Douche
# posted by : 8:43 AM
: 8:43 AM
I love how these guys actually think they're hard. I say we take these three 'bags and have a sled race, face-first, down from the 100th floor of the Empire State Building's fire escape, cackling wildly the whole time like Slim Pickens in Dr. Strangelove. Whoever wins gets to snag the hottie.
That skin color can't be real, right?
That skin color can't be real, right?
When they look back on our douchey generation, they will ask about the lip puckering. Richard Rorty (God rest his soul) first discovered this phenomenon during the Donkey Douche era. Thanks to the diligence of contemporary anthrodouchilists, this phenonmenon has cropped-up again in Great Neck/Queens.
Like cave art in Southern France, the lip pucker is an unanswered cultural and histrionic phenomenon, one explainable only through tireless study of myspace and faux Burberry clothing.
Like cave art in Southern France, the lip pucker is an unanswered cultural and histrionic phenomenon, one explainable only through tireless study of myspace and faux Burberry clothing.
Is that Joey and two friends or 3 pics of Joey photoshopped in with a hottie? I REALLY can't tell!
As for strawberry hottie, all I can say is " OOOOOOOOOOOh OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOh OOOOOOh".
As for strawberry hottie, all I can say is " OOOOOOOOOOOh OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOh OOOOOOh".
# posted by : 8:56 AM
: 8:56 AM
oh LOTD, trust in DB1. joey will be enshrined into the HoS. DB1 probably has something very special planned for lil joey, ya diggggg?
since we're blocked from viewing myspace while here at work, i checked out joey's page at home on Friday night. the wife and i laughed, pointed, and laughed some more until we were purple in the face. the concerning fact is that there seems to be a whole roving band of them. they all look exactly the same. orange, tagged-out, and spikey. and have you seen some of the girls that hang with them? it's frightening really.
why is there not a reality show featuring these scrotes? other than growing up gotti, that is.
since we're blocked from viewing myspace while here at work, i checked out joey's page at home on Friday night. the wife and i laughed, pointed, and laughed some more until we were purple in the face. the concerning fact is that there seems to be a whole roving band of them. they all look exactly the same. orange, tagged-out, and spikey. and have you seen some of the girls that hang with them? it's frightening really.
why is there not a reality show featuring these scrotes? other than growing up gotti, that is.
Yet another innovation from Mitch Meats (creator of Mr. Scrotato head):
The Choaditerod.
(did I say #9... bleh, #7.. this kid has got me trounced.) Wanna talk numbers, here's numbers: Joey P. #1 draft pick in the National Douche Leagggggggue.
--Vinny Scumbaglia
The Choaditerod.
(did I say #9... bleh, #7.. this kid has got me trounced.) Wanna talk numbers, here's numbers: Joey P. #1 draft pick in the National Douche Leagggggggue.
--Vinny Scumbaglia
# posted by : 8:59 AM
: 8:59 AM
This ass is Prompa in 3 years.
BTW, if one of my friends ever...EVER puckered his lips and tilted his head toward me for a picture I'd rock him in his face and stab his brain with his nose bone.
Ya DiGGGGGGGGG!
BTW, if one of my friends ever...EVER puckered his lips and tilted his head toward me for a picture I'd rock him in his face and stab his brain with his nose bone.
Ya DiGGGGGGGGG!
I gotta ask are you experienced? Have you ever been experienced?
ya diiiiggggggg?
iDouche
ya diiiiggggggg?
iDouche
# posted by : 9:25 AM
: 9:25 AM
I have to say that is some of the most vicious lip puckering that I have encountered on this site, and by vicious I mean gay. This kid is still young. He's got time to grow as a douche, which is really scary considering how strong his douche powers already are. I agree with idouche, this turd has to be related to the Greico.
# posted by : 9:49 AM
: 9:49 AM
Any bets on how long it's gonna take for this numbnuts and his friends to show up and tell us "lol. ur just sum hataz bitchez" or something equally persuasive?
Hey DB1, how's that Index of Terms coming? A suggestion: for Douche Lips, just put a link to this picture. No other explanation is necessary. Jesus.
And putting his whole myspace page in the HoS is GENIUS. I was slightly lamenting that the current format simply wouldn't be able to capture the whole thing. I mean, no single image is going to properly display the rampant homer eroticism, out of control bleething, and UBER (perfectly correct use there Pfah) douchocity that is Joey.
But it apparently doesn't have to. Nicely done.
And putting his whole myspace page in the HoS is GENIUS. I was slightly lamenting that the current format simply wouldn't be able to capture the whole thing. I mean, no single image is going to properly display the rampant homer eroticism, out of control bleething, and UBER (perfectly correct use there Pfah) douchocity that is Joey.
But it apparently doesn't have to. Nicely done.
Greasy, disgusting haji-choads. Soo very, very homosexual. I feel sick looking at these purple lipped queers puckering at me. Hottie actually is quite lovely, it's a shame she is forever spoiled hanging out with this sleazy trio of human waste.
# posted by : 10:01 AM
: 10:01 AM
Oh my sweet lord. I didn't even make it down to the friends section before. Let's put together a little list of some of the highlights from said list, ya digggg? Names include (but are not limited to):
Paulie Walnuts
hiZ b3SiToS mAkE Ma LipS qUiVeR
*MI$$. BrOoKlYnZ FiNe$t**
{{♥}} iiTALiiAN BEANER {{♥}}
[MiSz BRiTT]JERSEYS HOTTEST ™
Im super throwed super hard super fly super star
T3 AMO™
KisS Me, I'm Matty BliNGz$...
XR FCUKiN BEll0™
Apologies to the innocents but...hey terrorists? Can you do Great Neck/Queens next time? It may well work out in our favor in the end...
Paulie Walnuts
hiZ b3SiToS mAkE Ma LipS qUiVeR
*MI$$. BrOoKlYnZ FiNe$t**
{{♥}} iiTALiiAN BEANER {{♥}}
[MiSz BRiTT]JERSEYS HOTTEST ™
Im super throwed super hard super fly super star
T3 AMO™
KisS Me, I'm Matty BliNGz$...
XR FCUKiN BEll0™
Apologies to the innocents but...hey terrorists? Can you do Great Neck/Queens next time? It may well work out in our favor in the end...
Rivet,
He works at the tanning salon. LOL. There's a pic of him and his shirtless buddie sitting behind the counter.
That has got to be the gayest job ever. Other than felcher.
-LOTD
He works at the tanning salon. LOL. There's a pic of him and his shirtless buddie sitting behind the counter.
That has got to be the gayest job ever. Other than felcher.
-LOTD
# posted by : 11:10 AM
: 11:10 AM
Hmmm. Professional felcher. That might explain the rampant douche lips. These guys don't even need straws.
Fucking A. I swear these douches are cloning themselves. I can't even tell which one is the real joey, unless I want to go back to his myspace page. I will never go back. Never!
and....the hottie has really nice hair. But that's as far as I'll go to say something nice about this ho. Any girl who hangs out with Joey and his friends, sucks at life.
that is all.
and....the hottie has really nice hair. But that's as far as I'll go to say something nice about this ho. Any girl who hangs out with Joey and his friends, sucks at life.
that is all.
This is the cutest picture of a bunch of gay men and their hag I've ever seen. They're all wearing matching lipstick!
I believe his job is in the public sector, and by that I mean tug jobs in the alley behind the tanning parlor.
I believe his job is in the public sector, and by that I mean tug jobs in the alley behind the tanning parlor.
# posted by : 11:20 AM
: 11:20 AM
omfg... oh DB1, may i have your permission to club him over his stupid fuckin melon with that bottle of grey goose?
# posted by : 11:30 AM
: 11:30 AM
This just in... while out at a bar this weekend i witnessed a pic like this unfold next to me, and the scrotographer said [instead of 'say cheese'], "Club faces everyone!" and multiple fish faces insued.
2nd do you think they introduce themselves to girls in clubs as, "Joey Porsche," or, "Hi i'm J P™ rOcKs aNd fUcKs D & G .:. DiaMonDs aNd GiRLs."
I figure they skip words all together and just start rubbing their velour boners on unsuspecting HCs.
2nd do you think they introduce themselves to girls in clubs as, "Joey Porsche," or, "Hi i'm J P™ rOcKs aNd fUcKs D & G .:. DiaMonDs aNd GiRLs."
I figure they skip words all together and just start rubbing their velour boners on unsuspecting HCs.
Jeeeeesuuuuus...
This guy takes the douchecake. I bet these bags pour out the alcohol in the bottles and refill with water before they go out. If Jack Daniels and the makers of Grey Goose knew their product would end up in scrotes' hands like these, they'd burn the stills and kill themselves. Someone should crank up the tanning beds and roast these turds. However, judging by the color of their skin, it could take weeks. The only comfort we have is knowing their scrotes are too tiny to carry on their gene pool. I'm waiting for Al Capone to rise from the dead and snuff these Italian wannabe's.
Deuche Baggilo
This guy takes the douchecake. I bet these bags pour out the alcohol in the bottles and refill with water before they go out. If Jack Daniels and the makers of Grey Goose knew their product would end up in scrotes' hands like these, they'd burn the stills and kill themselves. Someone should crank up the tanning beds and roast these turds. However, judging by the color of their skin, it could take weeks. The only comfort we have is knowing their scrotes are too tiny to carry on their gene pool. I'm waiting for Al Capone to rise from the dead and snuff these Italian wannabe's.
Deuche Baggilo
Looking at this is making my mind tear itself apart. This is hilarious and rage inspiring at the same time. I'm happy and angry. Giggly and morose. I am...breaking down.
"Kellybelly, meet your new patient. He says his name is McQuade. He keeps mumbling something about smoochy lips..."
"Kellybelly, meet your new patient. He says his name is McQuade. He keeps mumbling something about smoochy lips..."
holy shit...wowummm i dont know what to say to these three... humm if thats what women want in a dude i am fucked.
# posted by : 12:56 PM
: 12:56 PM
Seriously, wtf are they doing?
This bizaree lip thing was referred to on this site as the "pink taco" once and I think that should stick. But seriously - I'm not trying to be ironic or funny or hypothetical - wtf do they think they're doing?
This bizaree lip thing was referred to on this site as the "pink taco" once and I think that should stick. But seriously - I'm not trying to be ironic or funny or hypothetical - wtf do they think they're doing?
I want what happened to Phil Leotardo last night to happen to this guy. In fact, I will now crown him Phil Reotardo for his utter foolishness. If the terrorists strike again, please God, let them wipe out North Jersey and wherever this asshole lives in Queens.
I think I see 3 queens in this picture btw.
I think I see 3 queens in this picture btw.
This is funny as hell. What I find strange about the MySpace Page is not only Great Neck in Nassau County and not Queens; but Great Neck has been traditionally a Jewish Neighborhood. Today it is primarily Persian Jews and Saphardic Jews with some Asians thrown in for good messure.
Bag em Dano
Bag em Dano
# posted by : 3:45 PM
: 3:45 PM
i think i saw somebody wondering what this obscenity does for a living.....check his Myspace page under 'occupation'.....so perfect.
# posted by : 4:33 PM
: 4:33 PM
So many of us point to JP as gayness incarnate. Yet for me, the magic of his pictures is that I survey the swelling scene and know--KNOW--that 'sche is getting mad play from the ladies. Perhaps the problem lies in mine own soul.
# posted by : 5:12 PM
: 5:12 PM
Joey Porsche Myspace Tribute Haiku:
stop touching your belt
anyone can buy grey goose
baglings on the prowl
stop touching your belt
anyone can buy grey goose
baglings on the prowl
# posted by : 5:54 PM
: 5:54 PM
Honestly, what's with the lips? What the hell is wrong with these people? Their mouths all look like assholes. I keep expecting them to hock up a turd.
I am never going to Jersey again.
I am never going to Jersey again.
# posted by : 7:37 PM
: 7:37 PM
Ahh... I had to come back online tonight to look at these rectum lipped, puckering pukes one last time today. Freaking hilarious. That girl is still lovely, God only knows what on Earth she is doing with this menage a' scrote, besides holding her breath... I can sense a heavy stench of cologne and Nair wafting through my monitor.
Total homos.
Total homos.
# posted by : 8:54 PM
: 8:54 PM
I thank God that db's like these ARE this stupid. Cause they grow up to be dumb, blow all daddy and mommie's money by the age of 3 and end up B-R-O-K-E. Or maybe one of them will get the hiv from his gay male prostitute and spread it to the rest of them while they're having BUTT-SEX with each other afterhours. Hey, Gotti-wannabe's, do us a favor, tuck your lips in...if I wanted to see that many assholes, I'd go to prison.
Douche Baggilo
Douche Baggilo
For like 4 days straight I've gone to this jackass's myspace every day and just scrolled through laughing for a good 10 minutes, I don't see how it can get any worse than this.
Someone has to add him and post that ya diggg pic on his page, that would be so classic
Someone has to add him and post that ya diggg pic on his page, that would be so classic
# posted by : 10:20 AM
: 10:20 AM
This is a legendary crop of douchery. Three shiny faced, brow-waxed douches making douche faces. No doubt this is an instant hall of famer.
# posted by : 10:38 AM
: 10:38 AM
Good to see Joey in the HoS so quickly, he truly deserves it. I'm also happy to see that Joey, like Tupac before him, has been so prolific at publishing his work. The number of Grey Goose/finger point shots from his myspace page alone will ensure his legend lives on long after he's gone (which I hope is any minute now)...I only hope those aren't gang signs him and his crew are flashing in several of the pics...judging by the color of their lips, I'm guessing Grape Street Watts Crips??
snoop doggy douche
snoop doggy douche
# posted by : 2:01 PM
: 2:01 PM
Please dont mention North Jersey and these a-wipes in the same sentence. Yeah we had our guido period with the midgets driving up and down the ave in their IROCS back in the day but nothing this bad. I have heard there is some pockets in Hudson county with latino's douching around but it might be just an urban legend.
This has other side of the Hudson written all over it.
This has other side of the Hudson written all over it.
# posted by : 4:29 PM
: 4:29 PM
I love the rampant homoeroticism on Joey's "Fucken Sexxxy" myspace. Especially the shots of the buff hajii scrum getting out of Joey's car, pulling up his pants... and nobody else is around, except Joe.
Gotta love the Ralph Macchio pic of Joe on the beach as well.. this little gonad's legs look like my fuckin' wrist.
Snap this bitch like a twig.
Gotta love the Ralph Macchio pic of Joe on the beach as well.. this little gonad's legs look like my fuckin' wrist.
Snap this bitch like a twig.
# posted by : 5:59 PM
: 5:59 PM
From the first time I viewed his mySpace page, I've been trying to think of something to say about Joey Porsche (tm).
I did not find the words for many days.
Many 'baghunters have spoken first, and spoken well.
And then I realized this: JP is so much source douche that a picture of him by his lonesome can--and does--invoke the same cognitive dissonance as a normal hot chick with douchebag image. Normally, I alternate between rage and bliss, rage and bliss, until I scroll on.
When I look at JP, I feel the surge of anger and hate...and then bliss. Bliss at realizing that there is such a perfect drain for my rage and anger. And then the hatred comes back. And then the bliss at the purity and perfection of my hatred...and on and on and on.
He is the One. The One who will restore balance to the DOUCHEFORCE.
Good call, iDouche.
I did not find the words for many days.
Many 'baghunters have spoken first, and spoken well.
And then I realized this: JP is so much source douche that a picture of him by his lonesome can--and does--invoke the same cognitive dissonance as a normal hot chick with douchebag image. Normally, I alternate between rage and bliss, rage and bliss, until I scroll on.
When I look at JP, I feel the surge of anger and hate...and then bliss. Bliss at realizing that there is such a perfect drain for my rage and anger. And then the hatred comes back. And then the bliss at the purity and perfection of my hatred...and on and on and on.
He is the One. The One who will restore balance to the DOUCHEFORCE.
Good call, iDouche.
# posted by : 8:26 PM
: 8:26 PM
Welcome you are Archy! Remember. There is no try. There is only douche!
iDouche
iDouche
# posted by : 11:31 PM
: 11:31 PM
holy fuck i coulda sworn this was a photoshop with 3 identical faces.
if not, i shall administer horrible pain to myself. after noting the relatively lackluster appearance of the hottie. hmm...
if not, i shall administer horrible pain to myself. after noting the relatively lackluster appearance of the hottie. hmm...
I enjoyed laughing at this saltan of scrote for many days now. If my dog died, i looked at his myspace and realized that it can get worst. If my HIV test came back positive, i realized at least i can take a picture without finger pointing and pouting my lips like an inmate who dropped the soap one too many times.
But recently i learned that my sister has actually met this prime example of douchebaggery. She resides in queens, New York for college, and she has met him and his friends in some clubs a few times. Now its personal. This infectious boil on the ass of society needs to be taken care of. Anyone have any suggestions? The more over the top and graphic the death, the better. Ironic deaths get you bonus points. Goodluck, and may god have mercy on our souls.
But recently i learned that my sister has actually met this prime example of douchebaggery. She resides in queens, New York for college, and she has met him and his friends in some clubs a few times. Now its personal. This infectious boil on the ass of society needs to be taken care of. Anyone have any suggestions? The more over the top and graphic the death, the better. Ironic deaths get you bonus points. Goodluck, and may god have mercy on our souls.
# posted by : 7:10 AM
: 7:10 AM
Anon 7:10...... i take it you never watched the Lost Boys. You gotta kill the source. The one that La Cosa Douchestra is trying to emulate. That's right Grieco himself. You could never face that task alone.
# posted by : 9:34 AM
: 9:34 AM
By god your right doucheterious.
brothers! this is a call to arms. We need to take down the source. This is a big task, but if we can just cleans this godforsaken planet of one more Lee Hotti or Joey Porsche, then we can really make a difference. and please bring any hotties found back to me. Its not their fault these scrotemasters are the only men they can choose from
brothers! this is a call to arms. We need to take down the source. This is a big task, but if we can just cleans this godforsaken planet of one more Lee Hotti or Joey Porsche, then we can really make a difference. and please bring any hotties found back to me. Its not their fault these scrotemasters are the only men they can choose from
# posted by : 10:37 AM
: 10:37 AM
You guys have me to thank,for posting this on Sherdog as a goof.I got banned from there,but helped this spread like crazy.I did steal the idea from the great Leehotti though
# posted by : 9:32 AM
: 9:32 AM
Never in a million years did I think that residual white guilt would strike some poor girl so hard that she would hope rubbing up against assbags made of solid grease would make her look dark enough to pass for "ethnic." Shame on you, MTV.
# posted by : 12:01 PM
: 12:01 PM
Obviously these guys spend way too much time in the mirror. They consciously made the choice, after praticing their "face" shot for hours on end, that that particular pose, or facial expression, was "the best". And now they use it in all their pics. Classic Douchery. I am strangely drawn to them and their world, strange indeed. JP's myspace page is without a doubt, the upper echelon of Douchetude. And I too agree this guy is probably getting more ass than a toilet seat, and more tanner by the minute. But nothing threw me for a loop harder when I tried to visit his myspace page, and it is now private. I pray that this my ineptitude and that this is really not happening! Please don't take JP away from us, PLEEEEEZE!!! I'm a grown man and now I'm sucked into the Doucheuniverse of JP and his crew, it to inspires rage and laughter in me! what will I do now, who will take his place? Please Douchebag1 do something to bring him back!!!!!!!!!!!!! This.... can't... be..... so.... The brightest stars burn the quickest.
# posted by : 8:28 AM
: 8:28 AM
Menudo is back!!!!!! Here they are singing their new hit "Can't Stop the Douche"...
# posted by : 1:03 PM
: 1:03 PM
it's a tragedy, but joeyporsche's myspace page is now set to private... did anyone else notice? i check it almost daily for a glimpse into the progression of his douchebaggery ... and cause he got me addicted to wut his dick did (i dig).
# posted by : 2:26 AM
: 2:26 AM
So glad I friended him....that level of douchery at such a young age makes me so happy...it brightens my day
# posted by : 4:56 AM
: 4:56 AM
NO, seriously, I think I saw these guys on a video singing about doing each other in the butt... "I said, what-what in the butt!" My wife and I laughed at that for fifteen minutes when we found it on MySpace. The one on the right kinda looks like Marlon Wayans...
# posted by : 2:14 PM
: 2:14 PM
my friends and I have spent many a night laughing our fucking asses off at joey the douchebag, it must be the grey goose that makes their lips pucker, and whats up with that lip gloss? we cant even "do"the "pucker"thing, have no idea why they would either.excapt that maybe you dont get a round mouth from eating square meals. these guys should of been drowned at birth, hopefully they never make "baby douches"
# posted by : 8:02 PM
: 8:02 PM
Unfortunately, the myspace page is now set to private, but just add the douche at - http://www.myspace.com/joeyporsche to let the laughs continue. Wow! Giant Douche! Turd Sandwich! Which one do you choose?!?
# posted by : 8:54 AM
: 8:54 AM
Dammit. No longer being able to enjoy the "Experience" on myspace is really dragging my days down. I have since figured out where the ass pucker look comes from. When Ben Stiller finally "looks left" in the highly climactic scene in Zoolander. It's perfect.
# posted by : 9:57 AM
: 9:57 AM
The holy trinity of douchebags. The pout, the hair, and the orange skin. A shrine should be erected, and subsequently burned to the ground with hairspray as fuel.
# posted by : 12:19 PM
: 12:19 PM
who the fuck is joey porsche?? or joey carerra? i looked all over the 'net (or at least the first 2 pages of google) and found next to nothing about him other than he's the epitome of douche. is he a celeb or something? wtf? how does he have a following? i've never heard of him before visiting THIS site! and WHY would anyone copy his image???? he's obviously got no identity of his own, so why would someone copy THAT identity? my head is about to explode at the absurdity of it all! bottom line--who is joey carerra and why is he a celeb?
You know these stupid fucks were all hammered and were in a club and go "hey hey hey!!! Everyone look like your kissing".....
You know what the next step is fellas?
"Hey....Dude.....Ever wonder what it feels like when......"
What fuckin homos...
You know what the next step is fellas?
"Hey....Dude.....Ever wonder what it feels like when......"
What fuckin homos...
the only reason the girl hangs with them is because they get her free coke. and by coke i mean coke from the coca leaf, and by that i mean nose candy.
they get the nose candy from their guido dad's stash, who got it in return for hijacking a truckload of cigarettes headed for Toronto.
eff you guido, oranged-out, photo taking with future Giselles, mexitalians who secretly live on the "down-lo" with their homo buddies in the basement of the sh!thole house in Jersey with the alluminum siding.
You sacks of shit better live it up when you can. In 10 years you will not have the money to do anything other than order a cheese-lovers for the guido-beotch and the 6 broken-condom mistakes that are running around your 2 bedroom apartment in Jersey City.
they get the nose candy from their guido dad's stash, who got it in return for hijacking a truckload of cigarettes headed for Toronto.
eff you guido, oranged-out, photo taking with future Giselles, mexitalians who secretly live on the "down-lo" with their homo buddies in the basement of the sh!thole house in Jersey with the alluminum siding.
You sacks of shit better live it up when you can. In 10 years you will not have the money to do anything other than order a cheese-lovers for the guido-beotch and the 6 broken-condom mistakes that are running around your 2 bedroom apartment in Jersey City.
# posted by : 11:21 PM
: 11:21 PM
Didn't that fag play Xerxes in the movie "The 300"?
Where the fuck are the Spartans when you need them?
Where the fuck are the Spartans when you need them?
# posted by : 11:25 PM
: 11:25 PM
These guys will be serving time really soon as as man-whores in the Nevada State Correctional facility as every douche bag should. Jeeeeeeeesus!
# posted by : 6:57 PM
: 6:57 PM
More pictures of the legend himself can be found here.
http://s108.photobucket.com/albums/n7/JoeyPorsche911/?start=0
http://s108.photobucket.com/albums/n7/JoeyPorsche911/?start=0
# posted by : 8:22 AM
: 8:22 AM
In other new today the famed Jersy Shore triplets, born in 1987 when Ann Grieco unexpentaly went into labor on the boardwalk, have sadly passed away.
In a cruel twist of fate, they got stuck in there tanning beds.
DisturbioGO
In a cruel twist of fate, they got stuck in there tanning beds.
DisturbioGO
# posted by : 1:41 PM
: 1:41 PM
Jesus, Mother Mary and Joseph.
The level of douche baggery eminating from these tools is vast and infinite it's almost hypnotizing. I must run to the nearest grease ball store and purchase my fake tan, super glue hair gel and eyebrow wax. I must also inquire on how to dress like them, because evidently, they are money.
Nah, just kidding, what homos.
The level of douche baggery eminating from these tools is vast and infinite it's almost hypnotizing. I must run to the nearest grease ball store and purchase my fake tan, super glue hair gel and eyebrow wax. I must also inquire on how to dress like them, because evidently, they are money.
Nah, just kidding, what homos.
Where, oh where, can I find an aqua blue nylon jacket like that?? And where are they? Sharing an outhouse?
# posted by : 6:45 PM
: 6:45 PM
NOTICE THE GUYS ARE PUCKERING UP TO EACHOTHER AND THE HOT CHICK HAS NO ONE. DOUCHE BIGALOW'S
# posted by : 12:35 PM
: 12:35 PM
Joeyporshe displaying his gay Guido Douche love.
http://forum.ebaumsworld.com/showthread.php?t=218670
http://forum.ebaumsworld.com/showthread.php?t=218670
# posted by : 7:49 AM
: 7:49 AM
Joeyporshe displaying his gay Guido Douche love.
http://forum.ebaumsworld.com/showthread.php?t=218670
http://forum.ebaumsworld.com/showthread.php?t=218670
# posted by : 7:49 AM
: 7:49 AM
The puckering is merely the natural phsyiology of a sphincter...no tension=no retention
You see, its quite simple : this highly evolved sub-species of the human race has, after several thousand years of unnatural selection, developed an asshole at both ends of the digestive tract.
You see, its quite simple : this highly evolved sub-species of the human race has, after several thousand years of unnatural selection, developed an asshole at both ends of the digestive tract.
# posted by : 6:22 AM
: 6:22 AM
Are these the Douche Kids on the Block? Quivering lip, hair gelled, uber tannned, 'hide the sausage' playing freaks.
# posted by : 6:21 AM
: 6:21 AM
http://www.myspace.com/joeythedouchebag
Check my myspace page. I have made it my mission to make fun of these losers. Let's be friends!
Kisses,
Joey the Douchebag
Check my myspace page. I have made it my mission to make fun of these losers. Let's be friends!
Kisses,
Joey the Douchebag
# posted by : 7:17 PM
: 7:17 PM
A search of MySpace for "Joey Porsche" gave this result...
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=202051424
Which really speaks for itself. The king is dead -- long live the king (or is that queen?)
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=202051424
Which really speaks for itself. The king is dead -- long live the king (or is that queen?)
# posted by : 7:57 PM
: 7:57 PM
Jesus Christ...are those human lips or just a flesh lined bear trap yearning for penis?
# posted by : 6:07 PM
: 6:07 PM
Complete and utter faggotry will and shall not be tolerated under any circumstances. I will pucker my ass lips in such a fashion upon emptying my bowels from here to eternity.
-Douche Bigalow
-Douche Bigalow
# posted by : 10:35 AM
: 10:35 AM
H.C.W.D. meets "Multiplicity". Poor addled Douchebag #3 is left alone to spit on bugs.
# posted by : 12:25 AM
: 12:25 AM
hi guys this is the "bleethed out hottie" from the picture #1 i'm not from massapequa i'm from the hamptons #2 it's not photoshopped they are my friends #3 here's my myspace link if you dont believe it's me myspace.com/tinalovey take it up with me on there instead of hiding behind your silly little made up nicknames
I hate guido kisses, of course I'm from Jersey and thats the kind of douchebaggery I see everyday.
# posted by : 11:09 PM
: 11:09 PM
i cant believe that the girl in the picture actually claimed herself to be in the picture. then defended the douchebaggery. and if shes from the hamptons then why THE HELL is she calisunshine? i used to live in cali. youd flip your 19 year old hamptons ass out.
straight up-yo. is that the language you understand now a days?
straight up-yo. is that the language you understand now a days?
# posted by : 9:12 PM
: 9:12 PM
What's with the butt hole lip pose???? I don't get it...at all. It's not sexy - not even a little bit!!! STOP IT
# posted by : 9:41 AM
: 9:41 AM
OK i think i get this picture now, you all probably big Zoolander fans and doing the "one look" or your all a bunch of complete assholes that basically make Italians in Staten Island/Queens/Brooklyn/SI look like jerk offs. THANKS
-Pissed off Sicilian lol
-Pissed off Sicilian lol
# posted by : 12:22 PM
: 12:22 PM
well we have this to look forward to. because jersey shore Italians are some of the most xenophobic people around they'll inbreed themselves out of existence in a few generations.
# posted by : 5:54 AM
: 5:54 AM
Who is fucking these orange assholes? It is more than 1 orange asshole right? This is the craziest shit I have ever witnessed........If this what chicks are goin' for God help us all, & when I say us I mean us normal people.
# posted by : 3:09 PM
: 3:09 PM
That chick has to be dumber than a bag of hammers to admit to even knowing these clowns, the only way she looks smart is if she said they paid her to be in the pic. I hope she got at least enough cake for a pair of shoes or a purse or something.
# posted by : 3:15 PM
: 3:15 PM
how do i find a picture of the Grieco? and where's the link to Joey's myspace page?
# posted by : 8:01 AM
: 8:01 AM
JoeyPorsche's myspace page is now private. but there's a great parody of his page here
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=202743659
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=202743659
i love HCwDB, but this picture in particular really represents the benchmark against which all subsequent douches shall be judged. this is TEXTBOOK DOUCHEBAGGERY.
# posted by : 1:47 PM
: 1:47 PM
I must know if anybody here has known of a douche discovering himself on this site and what the reaction was? There must be at least one to share on the experience. Was there fury or was it a girly cry while curled up in a fetal position.
Please share.
Please share.
# posted by : 3:50 PM
: 3:50 PM
noooo! not the ultra faggish kissy face! only drunk chicks should be legally obligated to make that face!
biggest douches i have seen!
well so far... dustin was right bout these vag-fags
biggest douches i have seen!
well so far... dustin was right bout these vag-fags
# posted by : 9:34 AM
: 9:34 AM
Where's whitey?
No its not the girl on the right...
*hint* guy on left...?
this will take hours
-Douche Nukem
No its not the girl on the right...
*hint* guy on left...?
this will take hours
-Douche Nukem
# posted by : 7:31 PM
: 7:31 PM
Uhhh.. I think Joey Porsche is dead.. His real name is Paulie Carbone, and I guess he is dead. Search the name in google..
# posted by : 12:42 PM
: 12:42 PM
Those lip puckers look like they trying to kiss stinky stars in jail.
They give jailbait homos a bad name.
They give jailbait homos a bad name.
# posted by : 3:56 PM
: 3:56 PM
Three of them?? That's why you're not supposed to get them wet or feed them after midnight.
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# posted by : 5:40 PM
: 5:40 PM << Home
