Leave the guy alone, he's a vietnam vet
 

Nothing about the eyebrows huh?
You must be tired. This guy is like some hybrid, transgendered, super mutant Mr. Freeze from a 70's early morning cartoon show. Please Mr. Freeze take off the Dog tags. Because the closest you have ever gotten to war is a pair of A&E camo shorts.
 

I am no geologist but I believe those are stalacmites growing out of his head.
 

Better watch your ass, DB1. You're messing around with the Heat Miser from the 1974 Rankin/Bass television special "The Year Without a Santa Claus".

He is flanked by his costars - Mickey Rooney and, um, a muledeer I guess.

I'm Mister Scrote Christmas
I'm Mister Sun
I'm Mister Herpes Blister
I'm Mister Hundred and One
They call me Heat Miser
 

why would you do that to your hair?

maybe there's a balloon charged with static electricity that's right above his head and just cropped out of the picture. yeah. that's it.
 

Stalagmite or stalactite? I always get the 2 confused....

-LeDouche
 

Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
 

@ batou:

awesome Airplane reference; he DOES look like Lloyd Bridges on an airplane glue bender...
 

LeDouche, tites hang tight from the ceiling.
Batou, nice Airplane reference. Lloyd had some great one-liners in that movie, as in every movie he was in.
And to the scrote...well...enough said. These chicks HAD to see this guy across the bar and say to each other, "We HAVE to get our picture taken with that Douche." You can just see it in left chick's face.
On a further note, it has come to my attention that a lot of these choads are wearing dog tags now-a-days. What's with that? It's clear that they'd piss their jimmy-tight-pants if they were ever even near a gun, so why the false advertisement? These guys wouldn't last a second in the military. The "don't ask, dont tell" policy wouldn't work with them. No one even NEEDS to ask, we can already tell. Plus, they'd get their asses whupped in a second, right after they got finished crying over the shaved head, which is what this douche needs to do in a hurry if he's going to treat his goldie-locks like this.

Deuche Baggilo
 

I'm looking....looking....I don't see the HC. I do however see the pleather snakeskin jacket spikey haired douchebag.
 

This post has been removed by the author.
 

Alright, I pledge the following* to the people of this site: if I ever actually SEE a person with hair like that, I will immediately walk up behind them and start trying to mat it down. Not with a brick or anything, as many of you would suggest. No, I'll just start pushing his hair down as best I can. The conversation would go something like this.
"Hey man! What the hell are you doing to my hair?"
"Trust me on this one bro. One day, you'll thank me."

* As long as he's not bigger than me.
 

If you stare at his stupid face for a second or two, you begin to notice a Gilbert Gottfreid thing going on. Sorry douchebag, only GG can get away with the squinty douchebag smile.

And the only joke is your hair, clothes, shaved chest, pretend dog-tag....wait, I guess with that many jokes, you can do the GG face after all.
 

Also note: his face is so featureless, even tho he's got all that grease, he couldn't even manage a decent schlorthead. What a douche.

Hmmm. He's what would happen if you gave a hampster E and then electrocuted it.

Striker striker striker Striker Striker STRIKER!
 

If he Looks like a dick and dresses like a dick, he's a dick.

Note to the chikas in the picture:
You may want to cut back on the weed and enteman's cakes.
 

Let that be a lesson to little ones. If you spend hours of efford and thousands of dollars on your hair, hundreds of dollars on some ugly ass clothes, and lie to women that you are in the army, then you too can get perfectly average chicks.
 

Easy way to remember stalacTite...they originate from the TOP of a cave. Once you remember stalacTITE=TOP, then you are able to remember that the "other one" (stalacmite) protrudes from the cave floor or bottom.
Regarding the choad...in his current upright position his hair rresembles the stalacmite. If he is hung by his ankles (which I am proposing), his hair then would resemble a stalactite.
Chicks are not hot IMHO.
 

Pigs wearing clothes, in a dark club full of intoxicating substances, everyone can be attractive. High school losers gather with low self esteem, unknown celebrities. 2 prizes not worth having.
 

HE'S COMING RIGHT AT US!!!!!!

*jumps out window*
 

Meh........ another day another douche.

this is a classic bag. shined forehead, dog tags from the 32nd douche brigade.......leather faux nake skin jacket and a chiapet that's skullfucking him. the chicks seem too plain jane. wholesome even. they look like they're in a high school band or something. i wont even go there with the skin flute reference, D-B.A.G has too much class for that. And by class i mean i'd take blonde Molly Shannon and make her a superstar.....
 

I dunno, he could have been recently discharged from the military. Looks like a grenade went off under his chin (reminds me of the aftermath of TNT in front of Tom of Tom & Jerry fame).

I'm certainly in the minority here, but I think chick on right is cute as a bug. And by bug I mean yummy ta-ta morsels.

Bagamemnon
 

Don King laughs at this freak of nature.The eyebrows,the dog tag the grease,the jacket.....the horror. I dont see the HC im blinded by the douche.
 

Yeh: stalacTite, from the Top, stalagMite, from the Mud.

ScrotelaCtite, from the Chin, ScrotelacMite, from the doMepiece

DON'T touch, handle or attempt to mat down crystalline scrotelacmites, not only will you be afflicted with skin irritation of the same type you'd get handling fiberlass insulation, but there is a hefty fine: these are "living mineral" deposits, and the oils from your skin will destroy thousands of years of growth.

Be that as it may... land's sakes mercy me what a douchebag! I'm sure if the light/angle were better that a massive schlorthead would be revealed on that lacquered billboard of uppernoggin.

Just enough whiskers to highlight the vile smarmlips. And to think plastic snakes had to die for that jacket.

--Vinny Scumbaglia
 

DB1, alot of pics lately have been of one or the other Hot Chicks (Lei Hotties) or Douchebags (this pic). There's gotta be more JP's or Pumpy's out there!

This guy looks like he thought the electric outlet was a glory hole.

This ladies, not hot. I have nothing witty to say.

- Ryan Seadouche
 

oh gawd... I just realized something...

If Clouroflourocarbons, found in Aquanet caused the hole in the Ozone Layer...

Could outgassing hair gels be causing global warming??
 

Oh my God, it's a real life troll doll!
 

What possesses oneself to do such a thing? Does this actually work?
 

Stalagmites MIGHT get crushed if Stalatites don't hold on TIGHT.

Sp?

Michael Douche Cockus
 

DICK

That is all

SkanderBag
 

Bagememnon is at it again being realistic.


Vader, thanks for offering to save humanity at the risk of having your hands severed.
 

instant classic.

-Otto G. von D.
 

Join PETA and help save the pleather snakes.
 

Eurodouche partying with Norwegian stewardesses. If I saw a guy like this in a club, I'd find scissors real quick and lop a few inches off.
 

@Hate Crime?

I would totally pay to see that! Or you could see my boobies. If you want my opinion, I think the money is the better choice.
 

Too much iron in a diet + a large magnetic field in the ceiling = this piece of massive douchebagness.
 

Is that even a dude? it looks like a bull dyke to me.
 

How far we have come, just visiting the site today and I run across the Crystalline Scroteflake. What a delight, although this takes me back to a very special image of the "Crystalline Entity" from Star Trek. The reference is perfect, visit:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crystalline_Entity

From this we all can understand the effects of a Crystalline Scrotelake sweeping a club dry of all its life...

-Toosh
 

dammit Hate Crime answer JG...I'm dyin' here....
 

Too bad this guy didn't have shlorthead and hotter chicks. He might have made HoS.
 

hand job
 

i've never seen anyone model their hair after the fortress of solitude.

-Shecky X
 

+1 - douchistani for the troll doll assessment.

Marcia and Jan, flirting with some boy that even Greg could pummel.
 

Good God, Y'all ! What a monsterdouche! DB1, you've raised the bar again! It's obvious EdisonDouche pissed his pants, shorting out his battery powered butt plug and standing his hair up on end like that because he's too nervous being that close to real live women. Those dogtags? Probably from Kiss Army.
 

Whenever I see some poor douche here with that degree of unadulterated glee on his face instead of the normal self-entitled smug pink taco pucker, I just can't hate the poor bastard. Sure, he looks like a pimp from Dragonball Z, but tell me he's not making the Beaky Buzzard laugh right now.

You may pass, Crystalline Scroteflake.
 

God damn BVG, that's two in a row. Too freaking funny!

And now that you mentioned Beaky Buzzard, when I look at this guy, for some reason I can't get the phrase "The White Buckwheat" out of my head. Look at the Scroteflake, and imagine him saying "Otay" in the Buzzard's voice. I just coughed up a piece of grilled cheese cracking myself up.
 

He looks like he just stepped out of a wind-tunnel...facial expression and all.
 

I really hope the only reason these girls associate with this Sonic 'bag is because of the 3- for-1 discount he gets them at the tanning salon.

Is that faux snakeskin in RED I see on his Nair hairless, burnt body? How some people leave the house is beyond me.
 

There are few things douchier than guys that wear dog tags. It's gay when people in the military do it to try and look cool (I am in the military, and there are plenty of those douchbags), but when you obviously are not in the military you take that douchiness to a whole new level.