Hot Chicks with Douchebags: Friday Haiku

Albino douchebag
Sporting black Sharpie face pubes
What's up with that shit?

# posted by

k-federbag : 6:40 AM

I know why sad chick
Is melancholy tonight,
She's with this douchebag

# posted by

k-federbag : 6:43 AM

Two-toned "blondie" 'bag
With caterpillar eyebrows
Should have drunk the bleach

# posted by

k-federbag : 6:46 AM

Caterpillar brows
Remindful that God is dead
Humanity weeps

# posted by

Mitch Meats : 6:48 AM

Hot chick wears raincoat
Might sleep with infectious 'bag
Make him wear one too

# posted by

k-federbag : 6:50 AM

This post has been removed by the author.

# posted by

nostradouchemus : 6:52 AM

Yo, Harpo Shakur,
your loofah head, and glower...
we're dying laughing.

# posted by

nostradouchemus : 6:54 AM

Otherworldly stares
Eyes: are these people vampires?
Silver bullets: Now!

# posted by

Dion Didouchie : 6:54 AM

I keep on searching
The Best Ass in this picture
Fur coat in background

# posted by

Clementine of Cappadoucha : 6:55 AM

When he bedded her
It's the day the music died
Only sports-talk now

# posted by

k-federbag : 6:56 AM

Crisp hair of sponge cake
plus flasher girl with man hands
equals puckered ass

Duck Duck Douche

# posted by

Anonymous : 6:56 AM

They are looking sad
Protective and wary gaze
They know he's a douche

# posted by

Clementine of Cappadoucha : 6:57 AM

It's CHIA DOUCHE!
Just plant the seeds,
water every other day,
and watch the DOUCHE HAIR GROW!
CHA-CHA-CHA-CHIA!

# posted by

Johnny Pipewrench : 6:58 AM

I fantasize that
Hot chick wears raincoat because
Yellow dress shows ass

# posted by

k-federbag : 7:01 AM

Bleached Mark McGrath choad
Spread your wings and fly away
From flasher hottie

# posted by

xander dingleberries : 7:02 AM

Lee Press-On face pubes,
you look like a damn cartoon.
release the girl now.

# posted by

pfah : 7:04 AM

She cannot just do it -
Ditch this miserable douchebag.
A bleethy side-effect.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:04 AM

k-fed is on fire.
too much coffee this morning?
you are a genius.

# posted by

pfah : 7:05 AM

the hair is on fire.
let the motherfucker burn.
burn motherfucker.

# posted by

pfah : 7:06 AM

Ali McGraw bleeth
Clings tightly to her douchebag.
He does not love her.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:07 AM

he's a producer
of music that sucks fat balls.
clients? Britney Spears.

# posted by

pfah : 7:09 AM

Douchey T-pube fag.
What the hell is wrong with you?
My Fri morn' now blue.

Sandra, oh Sandra.
Step away from neon hair.
Gamma rays harmful.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:10 AM

Caramel-skinned babe
Sickly, yellow skin on scrote
Douchebag has jaundice

His liver has failed
Probably from too much bleach
Good riddance, douchebag

I will comfort her
And by comfort, I mean bang
Now lose that raincoat

# posted by

k-federbag : 7:10 AM

His blank stare tells all.
The slight twinkle in her eye
Will soon turn to tears.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:12 AM

the sign says exit.
that's what the girls should do now,
if not, they will dye.

# posted by

pfah : 7:13 AM

Bleached hair betrays brows.
Her curtains match her carpet.
How can he suck so?

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:15 AM

Raven hottie, please
Step back from faux emo douche
Lest my poor heart dies.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 7:16 AM

She clutches his chest
An ad for shitty perfume?
"Douche Scent" from Wal-Mart.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 7:18 AM

Bilirubin eyes.
Grieco has metastasized.
Death will be painful.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:19 AM

@ pfah7:05,

Four cups of java
Two doughnuts, plus Captain Crunch
Now, jeans are too tight

# posted by

k-federbag : 7:19 AM

Members Only coat
Went out of style in '90.
She is infected.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:22 AM

Peruvian hair
Looks good spread on my pillow.
She makes my toes curl.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:24 AM

@ k-fed7:19...

jesus christ my friend!
your poop will look like skittles.
best of luck to you.

# posted by

pfah : 7:26 AM

Dank, Omaha bar;
Not trendy New York hot spot.
They're living a dream.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:27 AM

Sweet, I made the cut.
Now back to normal writing.
This is too much fun.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:29 AM

k-fed, my good man,
You need to eat healthy food.
That stuff'll kill you!

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:30 AM

Fruits and vegetables
Will ensure you come in quarts.
Hotties will mob you.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:31 AM

Peter North will call
And ask, "k-fed, my good man,
How do you do it?"

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:32 AM

This post has been removed by the author.

# posted by

pfah : 7:33 AM

front page, tricky dick!
nice work fellow 'baghunter.
celebrate with beer.

# posted by

pfah : 7:33 AM

I shall make a toast
To my fellow bag hunters-
We are united.

# posted by

tricky dick : 7:34 AM

Oh, Choad of Peroxide
does thy rug
matcheth thy drapes?
Salvador Douchalí
(Oh, and boobies.)

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:34 AM

Douchey Chia pet,
beckon the brown-eyed beauty,
uni-browed mop choad.

# posted by

Douche McAllister : 7:35 AM

When babes are estranged
from common sense, self-respect,
then choads will prosper.

# posted by

Marcel Douchechamp : 7:37 AM

Clairol accident
strickens pathetic Coke boy
yet Posh still blows him

-Celeb Douche (a.k.a. Coke Whore)

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:48 AM

Dipped his head in bleach
Then colored his eyebrows dark
And left some chin pubes

# posted by

ScroteBob DouchePants : 8:06 AM

@tricky dick & pfah,

Once in a blue moon
Do I eat crap like today
How else to compete?

Sugar and carbos
For energy to compose
Haiku for front page

You haiku masters
Leave little room for error
I must pinch loaf now

Breakfast nauseates
It might make me sicker than
This douchebag...with her

# posted by

k-federbag : 8:11 AM

He oozed 'bag on me,
So I lit his hair on fire.
Exit on stage right.

Bleach hair and chin pubes...
"Sqawk" quote the raven, nevermore.
Die photographer!

# posted by

Thee Bart! Thee! : 8:13 AM

Poor, poor tortured soul
You now realize you're a douche
Hence the blank douche gaze

# posted by

plinky : 8:20 AM

Hey Mona Lisa,
Pissed off or about to cry?
I'd be fucking pissed!!!

First grab the neck bling.
Pull down hard and extend knee.
Break the douche bag's nose.

Blood slicks off raincoat
And mixes with his head-bleach
"I'm dissinfected!"

# posted by

thee bart! thee! : 8:26 AM

Where are girls today?
Spinnaker chick, lemon tart,
And mistress julie?

Perhaps getting laid?
Kelly Belly, just-a-girl,
Did anon abduct?

# posted by

k-federbag : 8:28 AM

Clairol is calling
Tis not what they had in mind,
Selling to douchebags.

Hey, Hey gay Spainard!
Coral reef on yer head sucks,
But your sis is hot.

# posted by

plinky : 8:33 AM

Sad hottie distracts
as Mace Windu steps forward
to slice his ass up

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:42 AM

@tricky dick,

You are haiku champ!
13 haikus in one day
Out-freaking-standing!

# posted by

k-federbag : 8:42 AM

54 haikus?
wtf is going on?
13 from tricky?

Pfah, new pic's too much
tricky dick comes out the blue
with pure gold haikus

# posted by

douchetorious B.A.G : 8:57 AM

Dragonball Z bag
must be a really big fan
this pic can't be real

# posted by

douchetorious B.A.G : 9:00 AM

Tricky Dick on fire
Honing skills in ancient craft
Next douche book haikus?

# posted by

plinky : 9:10 AM

Groucho Marx eyebrows
Mixed with Linkin Park Hairdo
Is your girlfriend blind?

# posted by

Douchebag OUT! : 9:17 AM

Thank you baghunters.
You all are tough to follow.
I barely keep up.

New identity
Has energized my haiku.
It's I, boatbutter.

# posted by

tricky dick : 9:18 AM

Today's a good day.
Need to blow off steam on bags-
Creative outlet.

# posted by

tricky dick : 9:23 AM

hardcore, bad ass dude
If not for meringue hairdo
and walmart t-shirt

# posted by

plinky : 9:35 AM

@ tricky dick,

Boatbutter! Ah yes,
It all becomes clear to me.
I should have known it

If I was smarter,
Should have added 2 and 2
My addition sucks

Is change permanent?
Or like me, use two ID's,
K-fed'bag and ed?

# posted by

k-federbag : 9:40 AM

She flitted about...
Flew too close to the bright light.
Hottie "fly" paper.

Pun unintended.
I now feel like throwing up.
Curse you bleach T 'bag.

# posted by

thee bart! thee! : 9:41 AM

sad-faced emo douche
he wishes the Gator would
hold him so tightly

# posted by

John Edwards : 9:48 AM

Flasher McGraw has
Cherokee cheekbones and eyes
made for war or love

# posted by

John Edwards : 9:50 AM

Are raincoats sexy?
If she wears just a garter
and heels underneath.

# posted by

John Edwards : 9:53 AM

Her dark shining hair
the perfect opposite of
his hedgehog pelt hat

# posted by

John Edwards : 9:59 AM

apocalyptic
only some douchebags survived
his hair color died

^first Haiku ever for me.

# posted by

Norse Douche Destroyer : 10:00 AM

@norse douche,

A big week for you
First-time limerick and haiku
A virgin no more

# posted by

k-federbag : 10:11 AM

Nice one Norse douche. Got the first line all in one word.

# posted by

Spinnaker Chick : 10:12 AM

Nothing is sacred
Tricky Dick is boatbutter
I can't do haikus

# posted by

Spinnaker Chick : 10:14 AM

Ah, hold me closer
Tiny doucher. Even Elton
thinks you are a choad.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 10:15 AM

Can tricky dick's words
save this sweet brunette from Bleeth?
Only time will tell.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 10:16 AM

She's first responder
Doing mouth to mouth on him
He has Ebola

# posted by

Spinnaker Chick : 10:16 AM

Fall comes quickly, with
changing leaf color. Please let
her coat fall off, too.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 10:19 AM

Can this thread exceed
one hundred posts? I will try
to carry my share.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 10:20 AM

Spinnaker chick sez
"I can't do haikus", but look,
Evidence differs

Res. douche writes haikus
With wreckless abandonment.
Is on a mission

Haikus....addictive
Don't let boss catch you writing
Or fired, you will be

# posted by

k-federbag : 10:31 AM

Uh oh! there's trouble
My avatar is missing
For k-fed I.D.

It might be a sign
Karma is saying, "Be self"
Might give it a try

# posted by

Ed : 10:41 AM

My boss says, "Hey there
Are you writing that report?"
"In haiku," says I.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 10:44 AM

At the coffee pot
Friend asks, "Speaking in meter?"
I certainly am.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 10:45 AM

Back to the douchebag:
His head attacked by strange sea
monster in yellow.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 10:47 AM

Purple light sabres
Portend limblessness for 'bag
Hug babe while you can

# posted by

Ed : 10:54 AM

i took a long lunch
and see a ton more haikus!
shoot for 100.

# posted by

pfah : 11:04 AM

ass in the background
looks rather bubblicious.
too bad she wears fur.

# posted by

pfah : 11:06 AM

Allergic to clothes,
This hottie braves the raincoat
For 'bag protection.

# posted by

thee bart! thee! : 11:07 AM

A three digit goal
Is a tall order there pfah.
Need more ideas.

# posted by

tricky dick : 11:13 AM

Grip on hott loosens,
Lights flicker as he powers
to SUPER SAIYAN!!!

# posted by

thee bart! thee! : 11:14 AM

Is it possible
That bag here is a victim
Of evil frat joke?

A bottle of bleach
In the middle of the night
Poured all over head?

Spikey do is done
To make best of bad event?
Hence blank stare seen here?

Not even a chance.
This guy is a total bag-
Complete fucking douche.

# posted by

tricky dick : 11:19 AM

where'd he get that shirt?
maybe at the garbage store?
i'm Ron Burgundy.

# posted by

pfah : 11:22 AM

Pfah takes a long lunch
Met hot wife for a nooner.
Now, sleepy, but back

# posted by

Ed : 11:23 AM

this is Darth Vader's bar.
how do i know? there are light
sabers on the wall.

# posted by

pfah : 11:24 AM

Hottie grabs bleached choad
Bag's brows thicker than chin pubes
My soul dies inside

# posted by

Ponce de le Douche : 11:24 AM

boy do i wish Ed.
i ate a cheeseburger
the size of my head.

# posted by

pfah : 11:26 AM

on my timesheet, there's
no code for writing haikus.
i am really fucked.

# posted by

pfah : 11:28 AM

Jesse James is pissed
'Bag feeling up Sandra B.
Will kick douchebag's ass

# posted by

Ed : 11:30 AM

will DB1 be
dedicating a chapter
to our haiku skills?

# posted by

pfah : 11:30 AM

Bleach seeped through thick skull
Irreversible damage
Douche left with blank stare

# posted by

Ponce de le Douche : 11:31 AM

Even brain damage
Cannot make 'bag stupider
Rode short bus to school

# posted by

Ed : 11:34 AM

what country is this?
Montezuma's douche grandkid?
Cortés needs to kill.

^Haiku #2, yeah

# posted by

Norse Douche Destroyer : 11:35 AM

Poor douche is so sad
Bleeth is his protector
Reinstall Bleeth's brain

# posted by

Spinnaker Chick : 11:37 AM

spinnaker chick makes
this thread hit 100 posts!!!
well done fellow 'bags.

# posted by

pfah : 11:39 AM

Three digits are made
Unemployment we will file
Who are the losers?

# posted by

Spinnaker Chick : 11:39 AM

I won't yell "first" but I will yell "100th"

Guess we proved a point (possibly for the Anon bag). But we still did it. Whoo hoo!

# posted by

Spinnaker Chick : 11:41 AM

catherine breillat film
she sodomizes him deep
santorum viscus

vacant look K-hole
he spiked a rum and coke but
gave her the wrong one

with eyes like lab rats
jersey power couple hug
apocalypse now

# posted by

...and you will know us by the trail of the douche : 11:41 AM

i live in my mom's
basement and i'm a virgin.
i am a loser.

# posted by

pfah : 11:41 AM

@pfah11:30,

Friday haiku 'bag
Is most popular target
For douchebag hunters

Limericks, haikus
Always get the most comments
Should be in the book

# posted by

Ed : 11:41 AM

pfah, on your timesheet
Simply describe what this is:
"Brainstorming session."

# posted by

reservoir douche : 11:42 AM

Dear spinnaker chick,
The losers are the douchebags.
That will always be.

# posted by

tricky dick : 11:43 AM

thanks reservoir douche!
you may have just saved my job.
i owe you a beer.

# posted by

pfah : 11:44 AM

well, more than a beer.
how does a keg sound to you?
it sounds good to me.

# posted by

pfah : 11:46 AM

Spinnaker chick, woo!
She busts out the one hundredth.
Douches, be fearful.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 11:46 AM

Perhaps sonnet day?
Literary bag hunting
Is king in my book.

# posted by

tricky dick : 11:49 AM

Thank god for haiku
helps pass time at boring job
fuck this fucking fuck

excuse my language
douchebags hair, causes Turrets
smelly pirate whore

my haiku skills suck
comapared to the veterans
but I try my best

-gunna

# posted by

Anonymous : 11:56 AM

"Reinstall Bleeth's brain"
Types spinnaker chick today
Gold Jerry, pure gold!

# posted by

Ed : 11:57 AM

'smelly pirate whore'.
hehhehhehhehehhehheh!
way to use that one.

# posted by

pfah : 12:00 PM

Why is she stuck there?
An adhesive accident?
Need explanation.

# posted by

tricky dick : 12:00 PM

Thank you k-fed / ed
Reservoir douche gets applause
Sonnets would cause fear

# posted by

Spinnaker Chick : 12:03 PM

I've scrubbed my toilet
With less abrasive sponges
Than 'bags brillo do

# posted by

Ed : 12:14 PM

hey douche, Grampa called
and he would like his shirt back.
circa 1910.

# posted by

pfah : 12:18 PM

My first attempt ...

Christ, Olivia Munn,
What the hell were you thinking?
'bag grease sticks like glue

Else this douche must have
own gravitational field
even light is trapped

# posted by

Batou : 12:41 PM

Holy fucking fuck,
Bag hunters on haiku rush
See what 'bags inspire?!

# posted by

plinky : 12:48 PM

From pain and anger
comes artistic masterworks.
Examine this thread.

# posted by

reservoir douche : 12:54 PM

I made pfah laugh
I think my work here is done
*moonwalks out of here*

-gunna

# posted by

Anonymous : 12:56 PM

Shakespeare summed it up:
Be a douche, or not a douche?
He was a smart guy.

# posted by

plinky : 1:20 PM

God gives us hotties.
The douche bags taketh away.
Why is life so cruel?

# posted by

thee bart! thee! : 2:32 PM

Hot Chicks With Douchebags
New room at Madame Tussaud's
Near "Hall of Pumpy"

# posted by

Darin : 2:32 PM

What's up with his head?
Only one explanation:
His skull is molding.

# posted by

DarkSock : 3:10 PM

Hungarian queen
aims way too low with this 'bag -
two-tone meat whistle

# posted by

DarkSock : 3:11 PM

Lemon meringue head
contrasts with Groucho Marx brow
making this douche pout

# posted by

DarkSock : 3:13 PM

I just got
darksock's windu reference
slow I am yoda says

# posted by

Turner and Douche : 3:50 PM

HCwDB
Helps us us to survive the week.
DB1's my hero.

I'll take a double
Gin and tonic hold the lime.
Time to get real drunk.

# posted by

thee bart! thee! : 4:55 PM

Choad looks like Zaius
Babe and monkey love is wrong
You damn dirty ape!

# posted by

Marcel Douchechamp : 7:05 PM

protectionist stance
curtains and drapes are miss-matched
purple lightsaber

# posted by

the bag apple : 8:12 PM

hope has fleeted out
fluttering feathers flapping
purple life saver!

# posted by

the bag apple : 8:23 PM

Spongehead wank stare into space,
Desperate Demi wonders, does he love me? Finds no dick, cries autumn tears.

# posted by

Anonymous : 11:31 PM

Friday, September 28, 2007

Friday Haiku

Hot Chicks with Douchebags Google Search:

About Me

Hot Chicks with Douchebags FAQ

Hall of Scrote

Hall of Hott

Closet of Poo

Ass Pear La Plante

Purg Hottie

The Future Ex-Mrs. DB1

Pumpy

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