I'm not really feeling the olive oil head, but Jesus Christ she has a killer body! There is no telling the things that I would do to get a taste of bead of sweat that lingered on her beautiful breast.

Oh and fuck this fucking fuck

-Gunna
 

When those straps finally give up the fight, I want...no, I NEED to be there to help her pick up the pieces and move on.

And by pick up the pieces I mean Boobies of course.
 

In Rio they serve caipirinhas in really small glasses, while the women have really large hands. It makes for an interesting picture, sure, but it makes for an even more interesting evening. Statements are often made like "Whoa! Hey now! I told you, I'm AMERICAN! We don't DO that in the northern hemisphere!"

At least that's what I hear.
 

If I had a million dollars I'd bet it on the non-perscription nature of those glasses.
He thought they'd make him look more smarter.
 

Brazil. A country that can make even the most sexually deviant American blush.

I'm guessing she's a whore, and he's on Spring Break from Ohio State, spending Dad's money on a hooker that will leave him walking funny, not to mention a souveneir that will last a life time.

H-E!

R-P!
 

im at a loss with this one....im feeling more bag/not a bag? i mean, i think i just hate him because he gets to go home and pile that fine piece of latin meat and i dont. goddamnit, she is everything i ever wanted to be naked on the shores of Baja with...
 

it would be me, her, and a fuckin gallon of Cholula. then you wouldn't see me for a few days...
 

this bitch has a look on her face that just says "fuck me!"

plus, i would SUCK on them bomb scizzles..

as for the douche on the right.. the glasses he's got on make him look extra tight.. and by tight, of course, i mean gay..
 

i dunno fellow 'baghunters. this girl has a great figure and all.....but.....her skull has a roundness to it that rivals a cue ball. granted, the come-hither stare and sideboob tanlines count for much, but still....i think that, without the make-up, you'd wake up next to a girl that looks like one of the aliens from the movie Mars Attacks.

AAAK AAAAK!

and her choadfriend is not even worth typing words about. except for two words: ass chin.
 

He makes me want to masturbate with a cheese grater whilst chewing on tinfoil. She on the other hand...well I'd have to print a picture of her and glue it to my hand cuz that's as close as I'd ever get to bangin Chesty McTanline. Life just isn't fair.

And as far as Brazil's questionable sexual nature is concerned I have 2 words for all of you.... Adriana Lima. I'd swim through a sea of tranny gang-banging bags naked just to get a whiff of her.
 

He seems to be the type who would lean in real close and, in a light, effeminate voice, try to explain why he's superior to you in every way because he's studying business at Choad U. Then everything would go black, and I'd wake up in my hotel room with blood all over my hands, and none of it would be my own. And ideally, Tan Line hottie would be there and naked...except for a bag over her head.
 

I really think these two only got this picture because they were accompanying their cleavage on a playdate.

- Ryan Seadouche
 

This poor damsel has the look of, "Oh God I hope this picture doesn't get out on the internet!"
Sorry babe, it's too late. You're busted. Now ditch the zero and get with the hero - - -> plinky.
And seriously babe, with a set of flesh balloons like yours, is there really a need to wear a top while sunbathing?!?!
 

This poor damsel has the look of, "Oh God I hope this picture doesn't get out on the internet!"
Sorry babe, it's too late. You're busted. Now ditch the zero and get with the hero - - -> plinky.
And seriously babe, with a set of flesh balloons like yours, is there really a need to wear a top while sunbathing?!?!
 

"hint of chin-fungus" love it!
 

Is this not Minnow Slap from May 8? Why has no one commented on this, particularly in light of Fish Slap's triumphant reappearance? I feel like I am taking crazy pills!
 

Behold, Tyrannasaurus Rack. I don't think this dude is a bag but I would have to look at him instead of her to be sure. And that ain't gonna happen.
 

He's totally her 'mo.
 

Good call Art of the Douche, this certainly seems to be Fish Slap's protege. Definitely amateur douchosity in comparison; he's an understudy.

I'd study under her boobs while slapping him with a delicious bass.
 

WHITE UPON WHITE UPON WHITE (check out her fingernails as well!)Do you think they had planned this? Yeah probably for weeks!!!!

I'm surprised she hangs with this "Nancy Regan" big head bobble-douche (Did ya ever notice how big her head was compared to the size of her body????)

Hottie's tan lines and hint of a boobie-burn distract from the overall "purrrrrrrrrfect" picture.
 

Holy crap, i would literally suck. those. melons.

touche anon @ 4:30.

She just fucked everyone in the room by looking at them.

PS. I would quite literally punchisize this bag's face for free.

...and then eat fried plantains and chorrizo on top of a mountain with rio hott.
 

She conjures images of orange vendors at every offramp on the 110 and how I always wanted to pick one up but was limited by my spanish. She is truly so hot that she smacks of professional.
He is the kind of guy who can give you advice on aftershave, cologne, hair products, then quote Zinn and tell you how he hung out with Zach de la Rocha one day. This would result in me hiding in a dumpster by his car until he came back with orange vendor hottie, then hitting him repeatedly with a pipe while shouting over and over again "Columbus was a great man!". What, I'm the only one who sees this?
 

Good talk on the peanut head pfah. I agree that something is amiss.
It's as if a voodoo spell has been cast upon Brianna Banks and she's slowly turning into a shrunken apple-head person.

This guy's only game is, "Hi, I'm John Leguizamo's brother."

The tanline/sideboob combo is an unstoppable juggernaut of hottness.
 

Does his forehead give anyone else flashbacks to Phil Hartman playing the caveman lawyer? That smug little look on his face is clearly a cry for someone to smack it off there.

Brazilian hottie is just mesmerizing. I don't get the guys on this site mentioning a paper bag over this one ... my god you fuckers must be pulling supermodels and these douchebags should be making fun of all of you from what I can tell. I'd dip this one in honey and butter then spend a week baking biscuits to rub all over her.

He deserves a slow roasted napalm death.
 

@batou...i'm picky. and i am probably picky because i am married to a smoking hot woman. but perhaps you are right. in the future, i'll try to be less cutting when it comes to some of these "HCs". notice i said "some".
 

Damn those are some tig ole bitties.... Love the trashy tan lines....
 

batou:

All's I'm saying is that she looks like one of the long-neck alien Kaminoans that greeted Obi-Wan when he discovered the cloning facilities on the storm-drenched world of Kamino:

http--www.starwars.com-databank-species-kaminoan-img-movie_bg.jpg

And I'd totally tap some Kaminoan ass. They can give you head in the bedroom while they're in the kitchen making you a sandwich.

Now if you will excuse me I'm going to the executive washroom to stick a lubricated Princess Leia action figure up my butt.
 

I just decided I have to stop coming to this site. It just depresses me that herbs like these guys get chicks like that. It just makes me realize that my life sucks. Goodbye everyone.....
 

Corey Feldman-bag.

Nice diamond in the nose, babe (my personal most hated piercing as I always have to wonder about the excess snot associated with colds).
 

@danny noonan-
I have no idea what you are talking about, but rock on. Columbus day is one of my favorite holidays, too.
 

@ Sweet Lou

"Hi, I'm John Leguizamo's brother." Excellent.

This girl's unreal. I'd have no problem eating her ass in front of my mother. Hell, I'd even have no prob with my grandpa taping it. She's THAT hot.

-Honus Bagner
 

I want to be one of the golden braids on her necklace. And by golden braids I mean my schwanzstucker. Boobies. Boobies surround me.

Heinrich Himmlerdouche
 

This post has been removed by the author.
 

You know how, in years past, when a TV show's stars balked at a contract renewal, the producers would simply go out and find vaguely similar clones of the original stars to cast as their stand-ins for a disasterous season or two (Dukes of Hazzard, Battlestar Galactica '80, etc.)?

If Gideon Yago and Jennifer Love Hewitt ever costarred in a douchey sitcom and opted not to return, this picture would be pinned on the producers' audition tree, second from the top for the parts of Cousins Chester and Chesty.


Gunter smacks me as the "psuedo-sincere" douche. The one who has his low-key, eye contact-heavy sincerity bit down pat. I'm guessing Gunter works in marketing or advertising, but is soft-spoken and loves world music. 'Cause even though he profits from manipulating undereducated masses deeper into poverty with sociopathic glee, he's profoundly tender and deep, like her cleavage. He wants to make his mark on the world... like Chopin, Chaplin, or Kierkegaard... or whoever came up with "Where's The Beef?"

Sadly, he surely made a "mark" on that dress later that evening, which could easily be spotted under a black light.

Knowing Gunter's type, he probably helpfully whispered a tip on how to get the stain out (probably involving a product that he hawks), and gave her a brief assurance that - by mingling with his river of life - she has guaranteed herself a little slice of immortality. ...And then, not so smoothly, inquired if she'll be available to attend a party and fellate some clients he has coming into town.

Oh, Gunter... you are a paragon of scrote-emoting doucheosophy.
 

Um..If you check out the Climax Club in Chicago, you might learn more about Rio Hottie.

She's not cheap.

Just sayin'.
 

fugly peanut head with fake tits and a visible bra line and a bad dye job, he is a douche sure but she is worse and the way she is posing, well that looks like it hurts.
 

Give me a break, she's a toad. He can have her.