How old is this guy? Is that his mom? After all, it is someone's wife according to the ring on her finger. And it looks like she's wearing stonewashed jorts. UGH!

Arturo-douche
 

For the sake of all that is decent, I hope she's taking a shit in his camo's.
 

It's the Mud Horn competition at the special olympics...

"I honken yo hawn, bish!" --

SPRATCHHHHHH!
 

I have breasts, Greg. Can you milk me?
Triathlete hott has some mileage, but still knows how to sport the Baywatch bikini. Hear, hear!
 

I feel good for him, and luckily they don't mate and have a daughter, to horrify my eyes, and shrivel my penoids.
 

He is the mutant test-tube offspring of Mick Jagger and Ralphy from a Christmas Story, and she is -- well, personally I think she's all kinds of wrong, but to each their own. My guess is that she's his 48 year old guidance councilor on a heavy rebound from an ugly divorce. Her husband ran off with a 23 year old hottie, she turned to a mixture of Halcion,burbon, and mutant scotes. The end result is the train wreck you see here.

May God have mercy on her soul.
 

I want to break Elton John Bag's glasses here and take his lunch money. And I do hope her husband and children are frequent visitors of this site.



Not that I wouldn't want this delicious MILF to felaish me.
 

i think this is a topless lesbian... not a man... Does that make it a lesbidouche?

Is such a title even possible?
 

That has to be the weakest doggie 'bag ever. Poodles look more aggressive than this guy.

And did somebody just get done smacking the hell out of him with a dead carp they found washed up on the lakeshore? Kid looks like he's been hugging poison ivy.

Something about the chick is creepy, but I can't put my finger on it. Maybe Douchescrote Saturday could help.
 

Average semi old woman, with a fit body, who makes herself feel more attractive by going to bars and other places where a younger crowd hangs. She likes to think she's being generous by letting four eyes dry hump her, but deep down she knows that he would dry hump just about anything.
 

A cautionary tale.

Dear Katie Holmes,

Scientology will suck the life out of you.

You will find yourself hanging out with dried up "singers" from the U.K. and their football bus...er "superstar" husbands.

You will wake up in the middle of the night, in a cold sweat, with your creepy midget husband staring at you.

He'll be rocking back in forth, naked, mumbling something about an alien force inhabiting you and his need to exorcise the demon or some such crap.

You'll grow old.

Any roles that your agent might book that don't suck, (where you flash your ta ta's) will be shot down. Your career will be reduced to infomercials and Lifetime movies.

You'll grow old.

You'll escape down to Acapulco, for a major coke bender, a hag'd out version of your former self.

You'll not only be willing, but EAGER, to doggy-bag a post-op trans named Tracey.... just because shim is taller than Tom.

You'll grow old.... and the vision of the future that is this picture will come true.

Run away Kate. Run away.
 

Nice photoshop job. The lighting isn't right.
 

How about Travis Barker in the right backdrop?

This ginger, tat-sportin' nut stain has no soul. And Spanish McMilfers DESERVES to offshoot little gingers just for posing in this God forsaken photo.

Props on the Elton John drop and the Jagger/Ralphy mix drop.

-Honus Bagner
P.S. Apologies for the weak-sauce comment...I'm runnin' on fumes tonight. And by "fumes" I mean "energy left over after beating off 4 times."
 

You beat off four times? In one day? My GAWD! And you can still type! You're some kind of superman, and my personal hero. Keep up the good work!
 

Save it up in jars and sell it to sperm banks. When you get 10 jars full walk in and set them all on the counter and say nothing. See what they do.
 

If her knees are bent that far and he is standing up, either she is 8 feet tall or his ID says he's part of the Lollipop Guild. Is it Matt McConnagay's sister?
 

Wish I knew where this photo came from. I'm pretty sure I went to HS with this kid. He was in the special program. Also - that chick has one of her feet on the step that is wood, while the kid is standing on tile. She is also closer to the camera
 

Seriously, though. The dance contest at this year's mother-daughter picnic was nothing less than disturbing.
 

MOOBS!

MAN BOOBS.

A NEW HCWDB MUST HAVE

MOOBS!
 

You'll shoot your eye out kid!
 

I'm Buck Melanoma. Moley Russell's wart. Not her wart. I'm the wart. She's my tumor. My growth. My pimple. I'm Uncle Wart. Just old Buck "Wart" Russell. That's what they call me, or Melanoma Head. They'll call me that. Melanoma Head's coming.
 

They seem so joyous! Free! Ecstatic, even! Knowing that they are truly blissed out almost-- I said, almost-- makes up for the raging case of intestinal distress caused by seeing this picture.
 

Someone beat me to the Katie Holmes/Scientology reference. Such is life......but see? This is what happens when people escape from their cults; they do shit like THIS.

PS. Missed you all and this site...I actually have gainful employment, and it's too soon for me to be cruising this site on company time. In due time, my friends.
 

Is he even old enough to shave? This is child porn! LOL
 

well, crap. i was too late for all the mother/child references so i'll have to do this: who the hell let sir elton john's illegitimate love child loose?!?
 

Man, those Make-a-Wish folks will get a kid *anything.*
 

yikes. This DOUGHchebag is the multi-way genesplice of John Denver, Radar O'Reilly, Ron Howard and something else I can't put my finger on. Or want to put my finger on. Marvin Hamlisch? with a smidge of Bonad(o)uc(h)e?

*shudder*

--Vinny Scumbaglia
 

Looks like Alton's givin her a little kosher salt.
 

The End is near. Repent all ye douchebags. Is blondie a lesbian? I think so. I certainly hope they're both waiting for the lightning bolt that will strike them dead. Deader that a douchenail.
 

Pilates schmilates. You want an ab workout, ladies? Try crapping out a Jake Busey handpuppet.
 

Looks like somebody found Waldo.
 

Dammit BVG you made me snort a nose goblin onto my screen! That was perfect.

Welcome back, JG. You didn't miss nuthin'; it's basically been a lot of pictures of hot girls standing next to douchebags. I sense a trend...
 

This is the spin-off from Frasier: Lilith and her son from Frasier move to the Florida Keys for incestuous adventures.
 

David Bowie and Martina Navratilova had a love child?
 

katie?
 

didn't she teach with Mary Kay LeTourneau and Debra LaFave?

the dounchess of kunt
 

I hope like hell this has been photoshopped.
 

that chick needs to put her shirt back on.
 

This girl looks alarmingly like a friend that I had in high school. If it is, then my friend needs to stop working out. SHE HAS PECS!!!

Despite her bulging muscles, this chick is a hottie.

BTW - is that a wedding ring?
 

The kid from Jerry McGuire is doing well for himself...
 

He's the maaaaan! (ahem)
 

This is at Neptunes in long island .. this kid is acutally slow i think... go on youtube and look for Neptunes river dancer
 

This is at Neptunes in long island .. this kid is acutally slow i think... go on youtube and look for Neptunes river dancer
 

This is at Neptunes in long island .. this kid is acutally slow i think... go on youtube and look for Neptunes river dancer
 

This is at Neptunes in long island .. this kid is acutally slow i think... go on youtube and look for Neptunes river dancer
 

This is at Neptunes in long island .. this kid is acutally slow i think... go on youtube and look for Neptunes river dancer