0% chance this guys hetro, no threat here.
 

Ok, that's it. I'm boycotting until there are some hot chicks. I'm not sure ANY of them are even female. And what's worse...maybe they ALL are. *shudder*
 

This is the guy who would bring all of his Star Wars figures to school and set them up on his desk. Which would be fine, except he was in 12th grade at the time.

Blondie has the eyes and pout of a seductress. Brunette might be a trout trapped in a human body.
 

yay! i submitted this!

this guy is friends with my wife on myspace.

im going to go home and pull a scott peterson on her now
 

I see a cartoon balloon above this - is it a he or a she? - guy's head. And inside said balloon is a picture of a double baloney sandwich and a big stiff cock. Hence the sheepish grin on his face.

As for the hotties, I think I'm going to ask my fiancee for the ring back and tell her to 'beat it,' cuz these 2 cute kittens are giving me thoughts that I'm sure a death row inmate who has seen poon for 25 years can't even conjure up.
 

Hot fuchsia shirt, frosted product overload for the hair, shagged eyebrows, and puka shells. Oh, I get it. It's a Tahitian Queen Gay 'Bag thing. Nice. The most interesting thing in this photo is the mole on Hottie's upper arm. Still, boobies enchant. And by enchant I mean boobies assault the pleasure centers of my brain. Look up Hottie on the right. Money shot! Oh, and boobies.

Salvador Douchalí
 

Ross the Intern 'bag.
 

bcs.... is he gay? because i am seriously doubting this man has ever touched a woman in a sexual manner.
 

@ phah:

this guy's shirt should say, "gay is the new gay."
 

and vader does make a good point. the HC factor has been WAY down this week. still provided us with all kinds of material, but i was hoping for an inappropriate office boner.
 

well put plinky.

to be honest, he looks like a very butch lesbian.
 

It's the Ambiguously Douche Trio.
 

Damn, Maggie Gyllenhaal 'bag makes an ugly lesbian, don't he? It puts the "puke" in "puka".

These girls are not quitters.
 

@ phah:

yeah he does. It's one of those people you see on documentaries who talk about how it was like to grow up inside another gender's body. Then they have the op and life's all good. What a crazy, crazy little world we live in.
 

darksock is right. these girls are up for anything. and by 'anything', i mean 'once they're drunk enough, they'd go down on each other and let you film it'.

i'm not kidding. i've seen it happen.

and it. is. awesome.
 

Damn. K.D. Lang got fat.
 

@phah:

so did you happen to shoot this action? and if so, how can we get our greedy little hands on that video?!?!
 

Damn, that KD Lang comment made me laugh. That weird uncontrollable, wheezy laugh and I'm alone in my office. It is Friday, I'm punchy.

4 boobs smashed together, if only they were hott.

BDub
 

nope. i did not take this picture. i don't know these people. my experience happened about 8 years ago.
 

In honor of hot-chickless week, let me complain about brunette's "bangs pulled up on top your head like a roll of Kzakstani toilet paper" hair-style, which is only slightly less heinous than the pregnant cocktail dress style that is so close to Vader's heart.

Ladies, PUH-Leeez.

And it does look like she's staring at the cartoon anvil falling on Lily the Pink's head.

Pants are Just a Suggestion
 

1 more idea for the hotchickswithdouchebags.com t-shirts:

you can order a shirt with either your moniker - i.e plinky, darksock, tricky dick, phah, douchebob scrotepants, etc. - on or the name of one of the infamous characters portrayed on this site. These would be on the front of the shirt, while 'hotchickswithdouchebags.com' would be across the back.

tell me wearing a shirt like this wouldn't be a great conversation starter at cocktail parties? Or church. ha ha church. that's funny.
 

thats actually Perez Hilton in disguise...


-Crow
 

thats actually Perez Hilton in disguise...

What, in the pink shirt?
 

ok i think the girls are pretty damned hot.

they both have dumb pouty lip faces going on here. but still hot, even with brunettes horrible (what are they thinking???) bangs.

He on the other hand is simply FAG not BAG.
 

He's so nasty his corn has shit in it
 

This post has been removed by the author.
 

All the signs are there but i'm calling not a douche on this guy. He's just too non-threatening.

And I agree with Dark Sock, these chicks are definately not quitters.
 

here's a haiku for K.D. Lang, since I came in wayyy late on haiku Friday:

Premium Supercuts;
money needs to be shifted
to his gym budget
 

The brunette is rolling her eyes, because she's thinking "You aren't fooling anyone, Paulina."

Why? Because Paulie has girl plumbing. That is hormone pill-induced facial fuzz, I can almost guarantee.

If Paulie has a penis, it is only due to a quick getaway vacation to either Sweden or Thailand.


...Not that there's anything wrong with that, etc, etc... I just can't react with proper douche-revulsion when I know that's just a woman in douche drag. It's like she's wearing a Halloween costume... it's desperate faux-douchery.
 

and props to Pants are Just a Suggestion.

I thought I was the only one annoyed shitless by the toilet paper roll pompadour hair style. And when girls combine this hairdo with those stupid fucken Empire dresses......sometimes, ladies, you need to put down the Cosmopolitian magazine and LOOK in the damn mirror. This is worse than the cursed late 80's permed sorority girl bob; that looked like someone glued hair to a Darth Vader helmet.
 

Blonde little hotsie's face screams "I need a cock to the ass!"... the only other area on her body tighter than her pursed lipse. Oh God, the janitor's going to need to clean up the mess I made under my desk. *Glavin!*
 

Seriously. You're making fun of this girl's hair? Seriously. Seriously? Is that what we're doing here now? Cause that's not what I'm doing while looking at these two girls. If these two really did go home and get it on, I will go insane.
 

@ plinky I think shirts are a must...Hell, I'd buy three... and how about jerseys that say "BagHunters" and you could put your name on the back as well.
 

i love the shirt idea. shit, we should all wear them at DB1's book signing party.
 

Hi Perez
 

Anyone still wearing a puka shell necklace should be found in a ditch the next morning strangled with it. Asshole.
 

jerseys are teh way.
 

What's with the 2 worthless whores behind him making some kind of wigger lips?

Fucking scum
 

I refuse to believe that 'Paulie' is anything other than a bull dyke. That is not a guy, no, no, no,no --please God, no!
 

FINALLY! Hasn't anyone possibly considered that "Paulie" is acutally a "Paula"?

I'm sensing a bit of Butch-ery going on here, not 'Bag-ery.

Fuck it, Butch bitches can be big time bags, too: with lame bleached spiky hair, Abercrombie shirts with the sleeves ripped off, lame tats and plenty of metal pleasure beads wrapped around their necks.
 

that is a dike
 

"Oh, and I saw kd lang the other day--oh, well, yes, I suppose she's got a healthy aura. She's put on a little weight and overdosed a tad on the hormones, but that voice, oh to die for."