"Dude, I got a second chin and this chick is drunk enough to let me rub my denim-covered cock on her studded belt. BAD FREAKIN' ASS BROS!!!"

P.S. is yellow preggers holding a fragment grenade?

- Ryan Seadouche
 

I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT
I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT.....
 

Is it the lost Butabi brother?
 

Is he dancing with Britney Spears at the VMAs?
 

looks like she is storing up before hibernating this winter,
 

ricky learned his every dance move from watching this video. it takes a while to build up to it, but it's worth the wait:

http://www.glumbert.com/media/dancewhiteboy
 

This pic is funny as hell!

Unwisely-exposed-navel chick appears oblivious that she's being dry-humped on the dance floor by a guy who dropped out of high school to work at Express Oil Change.

I'm laughing so hard because I can't even count the number of times I've seen this exact scene in a club.
 

OK Ricky, I understand that you and your first husband got divorced. But when that happens, you are supposed to stop wearing the ring. You're not supposed to just put the new ring from your 2nd husband on another finger.
 

Wow..... another bun in the oven chick out on the town. Ricky is fuckin awesome though. He said after a long ass day at the used auto parts store he was going out Friday night.Douche on Ricky, just dont turn around.
The messed up thing is i have that exact same striped red white and blue shirt. Like i said this is an awesome party sans Preggers McIshouldbemy assathomewatchingOprah.
 

Ricky fuckin rules!
 

The chick in yellow is not pregnant, it's yet another one of those awful dresses that makes chicks look pregnant like the girl with Gator#1.

Whoever decided those dresses are 'in' should be shoot.
 

No acdc....... Gator's chick was pregnant. And if she's not, she is totally dressed wrong for the club. She need to be dressed like Ms. dry humped right here.
 

I guess that is today's $1000 question: Is sad-looking yellow dress girl with a lighter pregnant or not?
 

Jeff Gordanbag should be getting ready for a race or something shouldnt he?
 

Douche has got a boner. Its like 'guitar face' for douchebags
 

his chin is shapped like a flacid phallus and testes
 

We hear you're 'bagging, that's OK
I thought our little wild time had just begun
I guess you kind of scrote yourself, she turn and run!
But if you stop bein' a douche:

Ricky Don't Lose That Number
You don't wanna call nobody else
Send it off in a letter to yourself
Ricky don't lose that number
It's the only one you own
You might use it if you feel better
Cuz you're a choad
 

That's where he keeps his pet superball.
 

I asked God, and He said yellow dress is not pregnant. He said if she were still a virgin He'd totally bang her, but He doesn't mess with the "used" women.

I then ran a regressive analysis on the fourier-transformed data in the jpeg, and this confirmed that God was not lying. The chick just has poor posture, a billowy dress, and is currently holding part of the dress in her right hand such that it poofs around her waist. Math also didn't make salacious comments about the girl's emminent bonability, but I could tell it was thinking them.
 

Ricky don't lose that number, it's the only one you've got. You might use it and you'll feel better, when you get home.
 

Bonability...yes, we like bonability!
 

k federbag: do you have a blog? UR 2 funny!
 

It's still Wednesday...

Ricky with scrote-chin was dancin'
Self-concious, around he was glancin'
What the photographer saw,
Makes us guffaw,
On that night Ricky got no romancin'
 

Arch I'm not questioning you or God, but She looks like she let the baby batter stay in too long. She looks all depressed like she's there searching for the father. But my man Ricky has that "fuck it" in his system. I am questioning the bracelet. not the gold one, but the yellow one. Is that an I can drink because I'm 21 and people that don't have theirs on can't bracelet?
 

@ just a girl - 12:10,

Yes, I do. I just checked yours out and I'll e-mail you.
 

Preg, Not Prego?

NOT Prego!

Look at the dress, my friends. There is a tight yellow under layer, and a sheer top layer. The sheer top is billowey and has bunched up to give the ILLUSION of a bun oven.

So why does she look so depressed? Simple. In addition to having to hold her camera (cuz she forgot her billowey purse) she has also been saddled with the burden of hanging on to Ricky's detachable penis. It is chrome and undersized, like his bling.
 

Holy bear-scat! Isn't Ricky actually Choada-boy from "Orgasmo?" Looks like he left his dildo hat at home. Too bad. He could have gone for the DP here with Naughty Mcfluffytummy.
 

Micheal Imperioli needs to work on those dance moves now that Sopranos is over.
 

this is one of the pix that has actually made me laugh here and not want to run over a guys head with my car.
 

Is that a tazer I see in HC's left hand?

I want to see the video of Ricky crappie flopping on the ground with snot coming out his nose.
 

Is Ms. Halftop lifting that guy's wallet?
 

just a girl, i was curious as to how any one could find k federbag funny, then i checked out your blog. you really are a hooker
 

Nostrildomus is ghost-humping the oblivious belly girl.

Yellow Dress appears to be none other than Pete Doherty, between arrests. Holding a flask of cocaine.
 

Look, an asshole "anon" comment. How very refreshing and unique.

DB-1: Can you please reprogram the site so instead of "Anonymous" above these posts it instead says "Dildo Crust" or something along that vein? It would make things so much better.
 

Correct me if I am wrong but isn't a "sock" an iternet term that implies an alias, hence anonymity?

Regardless, this chick is stealing that guy's wallet. I think this might be a first for the site. She might be the smartest person out there. Knowing that douchebags pay no attention to their surroundings, especially if a camera is near, she takes this as an opening to rob them of their milk money. and by milk money I mean the money they will use to buy grey goose
 

and all this time i thought a 'sock' was something that absorbed all my foot sweat. damn. you DO learn something new everyday.
 

I'm not sure what "sock" means. I'm not sure what "darksock" means. I'm having an existential crisis. I'm going to crawl into the corner of my cubicle, retract into a thumb-sucking fetal shape like a large hairy gulf shrimp and fart slowly in silent fetid wisps until they pull me out into the light and medicate me.
 

@anon 2:01,

Dude, you really are a repressed, humorless SOB...and I pity you.
 

Oh, and the face on "Ricky" is why everyone hates white people. Including me. And I'm caucasian. Further existential nihilism...damn you Ricky. Now I'm going to pull out my colon with a spork.
 

i made that exact same face last night while my colon removed a fantastic swedish meatball and pasta dinner i cooked for us.

honestly, i felt guilty getting rid of it.
 

Get down indeed, young Richard!

Preferrably on your back. In traffic. And be sure to cover yourself with a carpet remnant so that rednecks think you're a sack of kitens and swerve to hit you. No sense in doing this half-assed.
 

I disagree sock.... Ricky fuckin rules!!!!!! Somebody said he looked like chodaboy from orgazmo. Whomever you are you owe me a keyboard and mouse. He does kinda favor him

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gMWcz6lSk_8
 

@ Pfah 3:01,

I just spit Starbucks sugar free douche skim latte all over my screen.
Good one!
 

sorry about that db out!
 

I have to agree with NG Chang Loves Box, here. This guy makes me laugh more than he makes me mad. Sure, he has some douche traits - the half-formed hand gesture, the unbuttoned shirt, Jesus bling, too many rings - but the double chin, the deer-caught-in-headlights look in his eyes, and his down syndrome body language just make me chuckle. Out loud.

My analysis: dork, not douche.
 

Uh, oh. White man dancing. Hide the childrens.
 

As it reminds me way too much of the Tard Town where I live, I will refrain from commeting on the pic. However, I will say, once again, Bravo!! You guys (Darksock, pfah, Clem., the Archbagger, etc.) always know how to bring forth a smile, chuckle, guffaw, or even a full-on spew-out-what-I-was-snacking-on... and for that I thank you.
 

I thought to myself..."Ricky, you young boy with a heart of stone...you are not a douche."

Then I saw 'bag gesture 78, the pulled up sleeves, the top two buttons undone, and the douche face 261...oh yeah, and that juicy pomegranite in front of you.

18 and a life to go Ricky...no more douching...I beg you...
 

'Tart, I've learned not to eat or drink anything while reading this site. D-sock has made me snork on my keyboard too many times - the little bastid. :-)

If I were to go to clubs, this is the kind of club I'd find. Not the kind where they host Porn Parties, or even dispense Grey Goose on the cheap. But the kind where lame-ass white guys try to get all funky with themselves, causing the girls to either hide their faces in embarrassment, or mope in a state of severe depression, as does our "pregger/not-pregger" girl. It's just my fate. I accept it. That's why I stay at home, in mom's basement, reading sites like this.
 

b, db-- but I bet you rock the HELL out of that basement. ;)
 

this is one of the greatest threads that ive ever read on this site. with all the good writers here, why are you wasting your time on this?

oh yeah, cuz its fucking hilarious.
 

wow jerk off fest

phah sucks
 

aww, look everyone! jealousy has reared it's ugly head again. and by 'jealousy', i mean 'shut up'.
 

Say what you want, Ricky still fuckin rules. He needs to work on honing his douche craft, but Ricky is what being a douche is all about. He bought like maybe 12 drinks for chicks, used every line he had and danced his ass off. He left it all in the club. Tomorrow he'll drink some beers watch the game and the next day it's back to Home Depot. I bet he smells like Ice blue Aqua Velva. He wouldnt even know where the Tag is at walmart.

LOL I was gonna wear that shirt that pickpocketed douche has on today.
 

I must say this picture has me confused. I cant decipher whether ricky really has to take a shit, but thinks he might score, OR if ricky got confused and put the ruphenol in his own drink. I think i will go to bed tonite pondering this while belt sanding my herpes.

Douche E. Fresh
 

Huh, small world. Apparently bag, douche bag and I live in the same town.
 

people, people, people, this isn't Ricky Choadmartin, it's the actor Eric Bana. take another look.
 

If this is really what happens on the Jersey shore I'm SO THERE!