Sunday, September 23, 2007
The Velvet Smog
How's a little Velvet Smog with a candy cane chutes and ladders Pink Hottie to counterbalance the fumes on a lazy Sunday.
Mmm... this pic has just the right ratio of hottie/doucherot. A Tiny Dancer with a perfect smile and shoulders of saltwater taffy I'd nuzzle like a lost dairy cow at 2am in Nebraska, and a heaping pile of 'bag hand gesturing frog intestine.
It's enough to make me want to get down like that Groovy Dude in the back left. Shake it don't break it, Groove Man.
# posted by Douchebag1 @ 6:10 AM 
Comments:
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Just as Kurt Russell and Kelsey Grammar were also-rans for Han Solo, so is this pair a coulda-been for Dirk and Rollergirl in Boogie Nights. What kept 'em out? Why, lack of appreciable size, of course. Except for their bellies
# posted by 
: 7:55 AM
: 7:55 AM
I finally get it!
1.Cut up velvet elvis from pawnshop for jacket.
2.Get Grampa hat from 2nd hand store.
3.Mix together & score hottie.
F'k whish I new this plan sooner!
1.Cut up velvet elvis from pawnshop for jacket.
2.Get Grampa hat from 2nd hand store.
3.Mix together & score hottie.
F'k whish I new this plan sooner!
# posted by : 10:12 AM
: 10:12 AM
I would look much like the guy in the back if I were to shake what my mama gave me. That is why I do not dance.
Forget for a second that colorblind “queer douche for the straight choad” is rocking four pieces of apparel made of four different fabrics. Look away if you can from the thumb ring/douche-sign/guido-chain combo and teenie-bopper-Barbie's nose job… And one question remains: Who has two thumbs and dances like a giant douche?
# posted by : 10:38 AM
: 10:38 AM
i would do all kinds of debauchery to her bad posture.
He's like if frank sinatra and donnie whalberg had a bastard child, and that bastard child went out and became a gay whore. Thats not a douche sign, thats how many vials of crack he charges for 'around the world'
It always kills me when guys buy suits/jackets off the rack, and act all styling, not realizing that they dont know how a suit's supposed to fit.
He's like if frank sinatra and donnie whalberg had a bastard child, and that bastard child went out and became a gay whore. Thats not a douche sign, thats how many vials of crack he charges for 'around the world'
It always kills me when guys buy suits/jackets off the rack, and act all styling, not realizing that they dont know how a suit's supposed to fit.
I would repeatedly slap this asshole with a package of his own laminated organs whilst snapping fingers into different positions to create a shadowpuppet of Donald Duck.
And I would trek through the poison infested Malaysian forests of eastern lore just to be this girls foot stool.
-HanksAnAss-
And I would trek through the poison infested Malaysian forests of eastern lore just to be this girls foot stool.
-HanksAnAss-
# posted by : 2:55 PM
: 2:55 PM
No 20 year old getting his first taste of booze should borrow his dad's velvet dinner jacket and satin fedora. Oh, and his mom's thumb ring.
I don't think she's with him. She looks like a UFC ring girl.
And he looks like a punk!
I don't think she's with him. She looks like a UFC ring girl.
And he looks like a punk!
# posted by : 4:07 PM
: 4:07 PM
Thumb ring = gay 'bag. There I said it. You have been outed Mr. V. Smog. The Rainbow Coalition will be pleased to have a new member. No longer distracted by this roadkill choad I will disarm the hottie by removing her pink headband and bind her wrists to my bedpost not so gently...Do not go gently into that Bleethed night young hottie...
Il Douché
Il Douché
# posted by : 4:54 PM
: 4:54 PM
Wherever this photo was taken, the makeup of the crowd is at its usual, unsurprising 4:1 male/female ratio.
-Oucheday Agbay
-Oucheday Agbay
# posted by : 6:35 PM
: 6:35 PM
And I thought Donnie Wahlberg had given up his douchie ways after the demise of the "New Kids on the Block"?
Don't visit this site when you are in a bad mood. It only makes magnifies the anger. I want to punch him, hell maybe her too. See what I mean?
# posted by : 6:52 PM
: 6:52 PM
The velvet jacket, two layers of douche shirts, the porkpie striped hat, all topped off by the curved fingered bag hand gesture and that 'just the facts, m'am' Jack Webb gay Dragnet look. Too much! Bag on choadmunch, bag on! Meanwhile, I'll take the hottie in and book her after a strip search.
# posted by : 7:51 PM
: 7:51 PM
Douche Suit Riot!!!
Oh, not sure when DB1 added the History of Purg Hottie section under the Hall of Scrote, but I'm a huge fan. She rules. Black Betty could give her a run for her money though, with her provocative attire and all...
Oh, not sure when DB1 added the History of Purg Hottie section under the Hall of Scrote, but I'm a huge fan. She rules. Black Betty could give her a run for her money though, with her provocative attire and all...
Uhhh, Scrotebob...maybe Black Betty would "give her a run for her money" if she stapled a pork belly to her frontal torso, and if they were having a beer belly bounce off. This girl needs to switch to Miller Lite.
Looks like Jack Abramoff's son raided his closet the first day he was off to prison.
Looks like Jack Abramoff's son raided his closet the first day he was off to prison.
I think this pic was taken on the floor of a porn convention. Oucheday Agbay is right, too many dudes for just a party. And I'd like to get a gander at brunette 'n black. She looks like she might be hotter, and with a normal body, than pink pixie.
Reservoir douche, nice Total Recall ref.
Reservoir douche, nice Total Recall ref.
If Molly Ringwald was Pretty in Pink, then this chick is fuckable. (I don't do rhymes, with the exception of LeeAnn.)
# posted by : 7:29 AM
: 7:29 AM
@darksock:
I may be misunderstanding, or maybe you did, not sure, but when I referred to Black Betty, I was referring to her: Black Betty Bamalam, not the chic in this photo, who, you are correct, needs to learn something from her 'bags and switch to lite beer.
I may be misunderstanding, or maybe you did, not sure, but when I referred to Black Betty, I was referring to her: Black Betty Bamalam, not the chic in this photo, who, you are correct, needs to learn something from her 'bags and switch to lite beer.
This chick looks like she has her right arm stuffed inside her dress. Either the arm is broken and she is trying an innovative sling or she has an itch.
Kenny Chesney-douche is pretty gay looking but he isn't a classic douche.
Kenny Chesney-douche is pretty gay looking but he isn't a classic douche.
Scrotebob:
I stand corrected, Good Sir. I had interborated your post.
Huzzah; you are a sponge of quality.
D. Sock
I stand corrected, Good Sir. I had interborated your post.
Huzzah; you are a sponge of quality.
D. Sock
Darksock: Thanks!!
I'd like to see Purg vs. Black Betty in a true douche-off. Who can get photo'd with the biggest 'bag? Purg has a head start, but BBB could certainly surpass her with a little effort...
I'd like to see Purg vs. Black Betty in a true douche-off. Who can get photo'd with the biggest 'bag? Purg has a head start, but BBB could certainly surpass her with a little effort...
Looks like she tried an at-home nosejob kit with a 9000 lb winch and fishook.
I feel no hate for Satinbag. He is obviously a low rung bag at this function. Perhaps he's just learning the scroteropes?
Cohaggen, you bastahd, turn on the air!!!!!!!
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I feel no hate for Satinbag. He is obviously a low rung bag at this function. Perhaps he's just learning the scroteropes?
Cohaggen, you bastahd, turn on the air!!!!!!!
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