He's the Hunchback of Notre-Douche.
 

when Sopranos go Bad

-crow
 

I always thought it was "Coo coo ka chew." Whatevs.

Anyhew, I hate this guy. Dudes that stick their heads out to get closer to the picture are even worse than headbutters. Hmmm. Headbutter. That's what this guy is. From his boyfriend, who's not shown in this pic.
Also, you know the hand in the background is attached to a douchebag, too. Matching thumb and index finger rings? And a black rubber band as a bracelet? Geeze.
She is all kinds of delicious hottie goodness. Love the smile sweetheart. Get away from the 'bag.
 

It may already be too late for this young vixen. She looks rather...orange, except for that weird space around her lips. Has he fully Jersey-fied her, rubbing orange spray-on tan all over from his own, douchey body? (In which case, I really don't want to know why her mouth wasn't fully oranged.) Clearly he is a demon (look at the eyes! the eyes!) here to punish us all, brothers and sisters. Pray to Purg Hottie for salvation. Pray!
 

Yo, Vinny! Get my fucking Camaro outta tha Port Authority lot in Hoboken! We're gonna go beat up some fags in Brooklyn. Just as soon as I'm done banging this JAP. baddumpbump.
 

God that chic's hot. Definite Jersey be-atch.
 

He elegantly extends his pinkey whilst holdin his tumbler of Grey Goose. Class. that's all I gotta say.

What's with the Douche Puppet in the background? 'S allright? 'S allright! --'S allDouche!
 

Today started out wonderfully. I woke up, had a beer, smoked two or three cigarettes, and came to work...only to witness utter douchedom in the form of this failed Ricky Martin. Nasty, nasty, nasty. This makes me want to trek back to my house on my schwinn beach cruiser, double-time, and clean the entire thing just to prevent cockroaches like this skeeze from popping up in my kitchen. DB1, you've just ruined my entire day by exposing my virgin mind to just how disgusting life can be. Thankyou very much.

-HanksAnAss-
 

He is a douchebag
He is a douchebag
He is the Walrus
goo goo g'joob
 

We all know this guy from the gym, the choad who slams his weights down and constantly shouts to his friends over by the cable row machine. I wish Thing over on the right would land a nice straight to the back of his head.
 

with apologies to the Beatles;

I am douche as you are douche as you are me and we are douche together.
See my expression, my orientation's in question, see how bleeth smiles.
I'm posing.
 

under the advice of my legal counsel, i am not able to comment on this picture. hopefully, the laws that are currently in place will be changed, thereby allowing me to continue posting to this fantastic site.

THIS JUST IN: there's a chance those laws might be changing within the hour.
 

this guy reminds me of my neighbor... and he's a douche fuck..

-Deuce Six-
 

"HEY YOOO! LET ME GET A CAP_PAH_COLE SAMMICH OVER HERE! WHERE DID MY RING GO? STUGOTS! HEY MARIA, GET OVA HERE! YA GOTTA TRY DEEZ CANOLIS! HEY LOOK, JOEY'S GOTTA CAMERA! COME EER SWEETHART! I SAID GET OVER HERE OR ILL BREAK YA FUCKIN NECK! YEAH! NOW SMILE NICE FOR THE CAMERA!"

click.
 

With apologies to Sarah Silverman,

You know why this guy holds his pinky finger off his beam and coke while he's drinking...it's because he's classy.
 

nice work bcs.
that must have been exactly how it went down.
 

Hey, K-FED and Danny. You guys finally made me laugh. The whole Vinny from Brooklyn thing is hillarious. And you owe no apologies to the Beatles my good man.
 

YYYEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS.
Victory. Now I will go home.
 

Glad to have been of service anon.
 

I'm so glad I staggered in to this site. After years of feeling like something just wasn't right, I feel whole again. Most of my misspent youth was spent in greasy bars hanging with Vinnie, Joey and Nick just long enough for them to polish off their 12th drink of beam and coke only to lift their wallets a few short moments afterward. Cheers Joey thanks for the happy memories and my 1st car asshole!

Ps. Your car keys are in the bottom of the toilet you didn't flush on your way out of the bathroom.
 

anon, the asshole said..

That works. Thanks
 

I bet she likes objects in her anus. And my objects I mean BLUNT objects.
 

***The Godfather ringtone emits from pocket***

"HEY YOOO! WHAT'S UP PAULIE? WHAT'S THAT? THEY GOT MY FUCKIN PICTURE ON THE INTERNET? STUGOTS! I AIN'T NO FUCKIN DOUCHE! LET'S GO FIND DEEZ FUCKAS PAULIE!"

***hangs up phone furiously***

"HEY JOEY! PUT THE FUCKIN CAMERA DOWN! WERE GOING TO BREAK SOME FUCKIN HEADS! MARIA! YOU STAY HERE TILL I GET BACK. DON'T LEAVE OR I'LL BREAK YA FUCKIN NECK!"

***Vinnie and Joey leave the club.

A young, sort of awkward man watches from a distant, finishing his 5th miller lite. The beer and the fact that the intimidating Italian man finally left gives him enough courage to approach Maria.***

"Hi. My name's Ricky. Wanna Dance?"
 

I want to move to Jersey and sell "orange".


You know, if you moved his ear bling down a few inches to his neck, you could have a Jerseyfied Frankenscrote.
 

Lovie Howell on Gilligan's Island gave tea drinking lessons and she instructed the castaways to always extend their pinky fingers from the cup. Well, this choadmuncher is Thurston Howell Walrus the IV Gaybag and he is only demonstrating a size comparison of his manhood. Oh, and hottie is my fourth ex-wife. And boobies.


Salvador Douchalí
 

Ecstasy eyeballs again. He's just piddling himself he's getting touched on the cheek. Must have been a good batch of MDMA that night.
 

His eyes are freakin' me out, who has an icepick ?
 

She's looks like a raven haired Hayden Panati, Paniter, Paniteir, that little cheerleader chick on Heroes.

He, of course, looks like a wad of walrus dung pressed in a Play-Doh mold from the Douchewanks of America playset. It's pretty cool. It comes with jesus bling (an old school cross,) little red cups, a pair of Ray-Bans, and a tube of axle grease to rub on the hair of your doughy models.
 

@BCS:

Fucking. Brilliant. Classic.

I have coffee sprayed everywhere.
 

thanks il choadrino i could write dialogue for vinnie all day
 

His jawbone is made from a toilet seat.
 

This has got to be one of the most overwhelming bag headbuts of all time. His head is literally eclipsing her perfect little face. Good god I hope that hand in the right of the pic is seconds away from making a fist and knocking him the fuck out of the way so we can see Sadie in all her glory.
 

Revolting and by revolting I mean fucking disgusting both of them are pathetic and make me violently ill, see that fucking BRAINDEAD Sunset Tab bullshit has made choad wanks and boring slores like this think they look good and are special.

Society is fucked.
 

Sunset Tan I meant, I wish the fake and plastic would die or move to their own planet.
 

They have, its called Long Island
 

I bet she is nasty, likes a good ass fucking everyday, and then licks poop off the orange shaft.
 

his name is mike cairo and I played football with him at glenbard east high school class of 2003...Yes he was a d-bag then and he obviously is one now. It sucks I know.
 

lol...i am not from NJ, and my name is not maria.