Thursday, February 14, 2008

 

Freshman Girls


Tall, orange and douchey is no way to go through life, son.

Comments:
holy sheep shit! there's an entire horde of Ghost Nipples coming out of this douches hair.

run ladies! run!
 
All three of these girls are the "poor man's" version of celebrities that I just can't think of at the moment.

Maybe the one on the left is 1 16 year old Lindsey Lohan?

Army of Douche-ness
 
Fizz: "Hey Brock, I got us some lemon drops."

Brock: "Hold on broham, I'm taking a picture with these srat slizzes."

Fizz: "Come on B-Rock, I have to go to the bathroom so J-Bone can rip off his wristband and try to put it back on my wrist."

Girl taking photo: "The flash keeps reflecting off your teeth."

Brock: "Do you bitches like date rape?"
 
He's got a wife beater on underneath a t-shirt? Did he leave the house that way? Did he get that t-shirt on the way to the party?

He hath the mark o' the 'bag.
 
ok the guy is attempting an ironic wooderson degree of difficulty 3.2
oh no thats a troy donahue deduction he is getting a big fat haselhoff...no artistic merit zero technical points and his crowd enthusiasm is tepid...
slump shoulders and forward neck of zero self esteem on the left is best option but the chick in the jackson pollock road jersey has a razor blade secreted in her san juan sink hole...and the right side chick has the feast of the seven fishes leftovers to contend with
 
This post has been removed by the author.
 
He he he he... This is getting to easy.
 
If ever there were a poster child for abortion.

Did Andre the giant fuck a basketball? I dub thee Jolly Orange Giant now do me a favor bag, the next time you spray on your tan in a can hold a lit lighter between you and the spray.
 
"Brah, why y'all hatin' my shit? I got this tee at Hollister, yo. I play A-team flag football for Sigma Chi. My broseph M-Rod can do a two minute keg stand. You're just haters, yo."
 
So he doesn't love Sophomore, Junior, or Senior girls? It's not just what the shirt says, it what it doesn't say.

In this case:

"Trust me"

-Bag-o-Douche
 
@ d. baggins
"Did Andre the giant fuck a baskettball?"
That was gold. Keep em comin.
 
I quote,
"The thing I love most about these freshmen girls, is that the older I get, the more they stay the same"

and

"I love the smell rohypnol in the morning....it smells like......victory."
 
I'm usually not a big "sketch comedy" fan--it tends to get repetitive, and SNL is running the genre into the ground single-handedly, but these guys called The Whitest Kids U Know are kind of funny. And rubber douchey's comment reminded me of one of their sketches/songs: "Gonna Make Love (Until You Wake Up)"

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1639461
 
This old guy is either an SAE Alum or a DJ at some "it" club in Wisconsin.
 
HAHAHAHA...this one made me laugh my ass off...you didn't even have to write anything. The shirt says it all!
 
Wow - he likes freshman girls. How unique. I've never met a dude that likes 20-year-old women that like to drink and fuck. It inspires me to want to get a shirt that says "I *heart* guys that can make me cum".
 
I just so desperately want to kick this 43 year old wanna be 22 year old in the face to smear his tanner.
 
Dibs on the one on the left.
 
Excerpt from the new Stephen King novel - The (keg)Stand:

"M-O-O-N, that spells Tom Cullen. My Laws, yes. M-O-O-N, that spells G-B-H. Tom likes to put his pee-pee in sleepy girls that have whiskey breath, my laws yes".
 
Is it just me, or is Sweet 'n Pasty on the right reaching for Jackson Pollack's Road Jersey's (tm Newman's Own) abdomen? I see your hand, Sweet 'n Pasty. On tonight's episode, The Freshman gets a lesson in lez love from The Cougar.
 
the back of this shirt says, "too bad I am a fucking homosexual;" it looks like the Jolly Green Giant got drunk and fell asleep in a corn field and woke up covered with pesticides
 
Isn't this douche some NFL kicker?
 
@darksock u just made my nachoes go all over my keyboard in snorty laughter. and you even misspelled ghb.
 
"That's what I like about them freshman girls, I get douchier and they stay the same age".

WTF is with the color of this asshat's skin?!! Was he mistaken for a urinal cake for a few months?
 
The plural of Freshman is Freshmen. I think this choad made that T. And I think he meant it to read "Fresh Man-girls"
 
A prune and shit smoothie tipped with a hint of tangerine chiffon.

and another no lip chic with two pals exhibiting early stage male pattern baldness
 
I hate senior douchebags.
 
It's nice to see that Gary Busey has cleaned himself up.
 
Dad, what are you doing here at the sorority house hitting on my friends, again? And, what the fuck happened to your hair piece?

These chicks are freshmen at Bergen County Community College; Jersey's "finest". Yikes. There not even 3:45 AM hott. They're 4:45 AM already home and can't sleep and no other chicks will answer the phone "hott" and only then if you've smoke a J first.
 
I think this bag needed money to buy a keg for his frat: Delta Delta Douchebag; so he answered one of those adds that says, "Get paid $10/hour to do nothing," but that nothing consisted of high Gamma Ray exposure...my only hope is that the technician jacked the machine high enough for the rays to penetrate the often tough and leathery epidermis of this prodigious bag and alter his douche DNA forever
 
i think they all switched shirts...i think his is the yellow one to the right.
 
He's the greasiest one we've seen in a while, I think.

Makes me wish I were a freshman again...so I could turn him down.
 
those aren't freshmen....i know.
 
When did Biff join Flock of Seagulls?
 
one of your best captions yet DB1.
 
The douche is strong with this one!
This 'bag is closseted love child of George Hamilton and Joan Rivers.
The chicks have bigger arms than he does.
 
OMG IT'S CHEF GORDON RAMSAY
 
Jerry "The King" Lawler, the college years.


I swear...the hair and the smile match exactly!
 
ok 1st off, the girl in the yellow is me :o) and we are all SENIORS, not freshmen. 2nd off, we couldnt not take a pic w/ this guy.. i mean cmon look at him!! he's wearing more makeup than all 3 of us girls combined. douche at his finest
 
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