Hot Chicks with Douchebags: Friday Haiku

Mama's little boy
She's given birth, something's wrong
baby is a douche

# posted by

George Dubya Douche : 6:49 AM

double dog dare you
to touch your tongue to hottie
its stuck! its stuck! yuck.

# posted by

bcs : 6:52 AM

flaming tattoed douche
spreads herpes with outstretched tongue
run you stupid bitch

# posted by

bcs : 6:53 AM

dont look now hottie
but your ashtray's licking you
put out smoke in eye

# posted by

bcs : 6:55 AM

New douche maneuver
Nipple licking in public
Weep for the future

# posted by

Mr. White : 6:56 AM

Nip proximity
Too close, douche-face 46
Burn him with lit cig

# posted by

ScroteBob DouchePants : 6:57 AM

nice rack. but your face?
a face only Mom could love.
boobs are distraction.

# posted by

pfah : 6:57 AM

Spider-man comic
Stenciled on this douchebag's arm
Stan Lee is not pleased

# posted by

Mr. White : 6:58 AM

hott - cigarette burn
to face best way to fight off
gene simmons douchebag

# posted by

summer's eve satchel : 6:58 AM

wifebeater douche licks,
hot has pooch face, great hogans
I miss breast feeding

# posted by

Douche Bigalow : 6:59 AM

Large, pillowy mamms
Douchebag infantilism
I'll go vomit now

# posted by

ed : 7:00 AM

lovely tattoo, douche.
cancer from second-hand smoke
can only help things.

# posted by

pfah : 7:00 AM

douche licking nipple
hottie smoking cigarette
hope both get cancer

# posted by

bcs : 7:01 AM

Hott forced to say,
"Get off me you dirty douchebag!
I said I like you"

# posted by

kissy lips : 7:03 AM

scrote's tattooes look like
graffiti at rest stop john
douchebag has wide stance

# posted by

bcs : 7:03 AM

Nursing a douchebag?
Extremely poor form hottie
let him starve to death

# posted by

kissy lips : 7:04 AM

Cigarettes can kill
This pic disappoints that guy,
C. Everett Koop

# posted by

ed : 7:06 AM

Who cares about face,
Bury face in these melons,
and use shopping bag

# posted by

Douche Bigalow : 7:06 AM

Douchebag, cigarette
Greico or cancer - you pick
Hott chooses both. Damn.

# posted by

ScroteBob DouchePants : 7:07 AM

decided to eat
only half the acid but
spilled rest on hott's bra

# posted by

bcs : 7:07 AM

Turn douche baby over
and change his shitty diaper
something smells like poo

# posted by

kissy lips : 7:09 AM

Hottie nursemaid squirts
Douchebag grips his small boner
Lactation porno

# posted by

ed : 7:09 AM

Vet from Scrote Army
Crippled from anti-douche mines
Last lick, die fuck dick

# posted by

Jonathan Pompadour : 7:09 AM

douchebag has lame tatts
looks like a childs doodles
remove them with torch

# posted by

bcs : 7:10 AM

What do we have here?
Oh no, the dreaded toungue 'bag.
Creeper would be proud.

Friday morn' cleavite.
Ah, sure to get you going.
Me love her long time.

-Amerigo Vesdouchey

# posted by

Anonymous : 7:10 AM

Voluptuous mamms
Disgusting, pathetic douche
Sad commentary

# posted by

ed : 7:11 AM

Milk does a body
good. Apparently, this douche
has no more in fridge.

# posted by

douche almighty : 7:12 AM

too bad hotties tit
isn't a bug zapper. ZAP!
one less gross douchebag

# posted by

bcs : 7:12 AM

"Licketh my tittie"
demanded mistress Diane
hope they both get aids

# posted by

bcs : 7:16 AM

rub a dub dub three
boobs in a pub lose the right
most give me a chub

# posted by

newman's own balsamic douche : 7:17 AM

flaming tats on arm
flames fly from tats to burn hott
both die together

# posted by

cc : 7:17 AM

chick is not that hot
ok but nothing special
like sex with my wife

# posted by

bcs : 7:18 AM

Reincarnation:
Laughing bright colored tongue douche
Heath Ledger's Joker

# posted by

Jonathan Pompadour : 7:18 AM

sweet mother of bleeth
please be using your coffin nail
to brand douchebag tongue

# posted by

newman's own balsamic douche : 7:20 AM

bcs is right
Chick is not that hot, but she
Can still turn my crank

# posted by

Mr. White : 7:21 AM

The Trainwreck opened
the door for bagging legions
Is this guy the same?

Is this the first wave
Of nipple-licking douchebags?
Jesus weeps for us

# posted by

Mr. White : 7:23 AM

virginia slims say
you've come a long way baby
i say not far enough

# posted by

newman's own balsamic douche : 7:26 AM

douche reminds me of
mcdonalds breakfast sandwich
gives me stomach pains

# posted by

bcs : 7:30 AM

mr white declares
"If she likes golden showers,
good enough for me"

# posted by

bcs : 7:32 AM

unleash pooch's bra
bury face in huge funbags,
my jaw dislocates

# posted by

Douche Bigalow : 7:33 AM

bcs, I think
If she's up for public licks
She won't mind urine

# posted by

Mr. White : 7:37 AM

A girl with big boobs
And clearly low self-esteem
A winning package

# posted by

Mr. White : 7:38 AM

Hey there, Ramona
Brush teeth, wash hair, and take bath
Then we'll party hard

# posted by

Mr. White : 7:39 AM

jersey norm mcdonald
had a cow eieio
every guy would tap that teet

# posted by

newman's own balsamic douche : 7:40 AM

Club scene in bad porn.
What can we do to improve?
Add flame tat to douche.

# posted by

All Your Douche Are Belong To Us : 7:43 AM

Douche caveman thirsty.
Make woman feel natural:
Suck silicone milk.

# posted by

All Your Douche Are Belong To Us : 7:45 AM

Gila Monster tongue
leaves hipster hott wanting
mannish boy dry mouthed

# posted by

jacques doucheau : 7:48 AM

Creed is playing now.
Bad hair extensions are hot.
Give me your tongue fan.

# posted by

All Your Douche Are Belong To Us : 7:50 AM

tattbag, go away
laser removal is cheap
remove your whole head

# posted by

danny noonan : 7:51 AM

Her chin reminds me
Of a diseased crocodile
Steve Irwin would like

# posted by

danny noonan : 7:54 AM

Kissing a smoker
Is like licking an ashtray
Lick boobies: better

# posted by

danny noonan : 7:56 AM

i spot a ghost nip
no wait thats a douchebag
evil just the same

# posted by

tequila mockingbag : 7:59 AM

Delectible mamms
Douche infects with his Herp tongue
Dirty, crying shame!

# posted by

ed : 8:00 AM

Regressive douchebag
Probably shat himself too
Deserves a time-out

# posted by

ed : 8:03 AM

bleeth tried to quit
nicotine gum don't snap good
grease makes patch slip off

# posted by

newman's own balsamic douche : 8:04 AM

She adopted him
Return him to agency
Don't want a retard

# posted by

ed : 8:05 AM

He's been a bad boy
Scribbled on arm with marker
Should get a beating

# posted by

ed : 8:07 AM

The Douche Bag Son wails:
"Gawd-dammit, Mom! Git off me!
Yew done crushed my cigs!"

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:08 AM

Ed, cigarettes kill?
She should stab him through the heart
Or ash out his eyes.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 8:09 AM

Smoking Madonna,
Her ear lobe is like her vag:
Repeatedly pierced.

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:10 AM

is the bleeth/bag cig
the new kissy face? viral signs
mutating in circles

# posted by

newman's own balsamic douche : 8:10 AM

8 o'clock west coast
And already I'm behind.
Many posts to come.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 8:11 AM

Douche and his mother
Severe Oedipus complex
Give him shock treatment

# posted by

ed : 8:13 AM

Duke trundles in late
Still, a full day of mocking
This 'bag deserves it

# posted by

ed : 8:17 AM

Come ON, DB1;
Where did your hangover go?
Post later next time!!!

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:21 AM

My job pays the bills,
but interferes with Haiku.
"Honey, I quit work!"

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:22 AM

Dark's Madonna joke
Both witty and apropo
Nicely rendered, sir

# posted by

ed : 8:22 AM

He's a boob licker,
but I go lickety-split.
But not for this girl.

# posted by

elastic snap hole of the love bear : 8:23 AM

Second-boob smoke kills.
I wander if he can taste
Her emphysema.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 8:24 AM

Limericks post late
But Haiku is way early
He's fucking with us

# posted by

ed : 8:25 AM

Scarred stomach confirms
Bag was a cesarean.
Doctor slapped the mom.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 8:30 AM

She's got smoker's cough
She'll clear throat....spit in his eye
I'll have a big smile

# posted by

ed : 8:30 AM

tatted up douchebag
with face next to the boobies
please kill me right now

cmon babycakes
burn my eyes out with that cig
so I can't see this

# posted by

douchetorious B.A.G. : 8:32 AM

Hate kissing smokers?
Your dick doesn't have taste buds.
Let her blow away.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 8:37 AM

Thank you Mister Ed
But just LOOK at that picture;
It's just too easy.

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:38 AM

Grinning imbecile
licking nicotine flapjacks
Then his jaw falls off

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:39 AM

Now I get this pic
How dare DB1 show us
a snowballing pic

A wise man once said
it takes all kinds of douchebags
to fill a night club

Snowballers need love
even though it's "his own brand"
he loves the man milk.

# posted by

douchetorious B.A.G. : 8:40 AM

Her boob's a-dangle,
sagging into his pie-hole
leaking thin brown tar.

# posted by

DarkSock : 8:41 AM

Tattoos look silly,
But huge boobies in the face
Can you blame the lick?

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 8:47 AM

I can't get shit done,
Too many scrotebags to mock,
No trust fund, which sucks

# posted by

Douche Bigalow : 8:49 AM

BCS nice ref
Maybe you will like this one
"You'll ash your eye out!"

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 8:51 AM

If she burns his neck,
He'll be at a loss for words
(He'll bite of his tongue)

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:06 AM

Kid loves Carl's Jr
He got one of his tattoos
From his kiddie meal

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:13 AM

Proper position:
Wang 'tween mamms and hand on face.
Women love their pearls

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:16 AM

Easy Photoshop,
Replace bag with pic of self.
Bam! New avatar.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:19 AM

Hired professional,
Substitutes for bag's wet nurse
and poisons breast milk.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:21 AM

The Duke's on a roll
He loves the mamms, hates the 'bag
But then don't we all?

# posted by

ed : 9:23 AM

Loud noise in background.
Buxom hott turns to see cause.
Knocks bag unconscious.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:25 AM

wonderbras vexing....
we need real ham radio knobs,
to dial in Rangoon...

# posted by

Douche Bigalow : 9:25 AM

Half hour of work gone.
Still outraged by bag antics
And hungry for boob.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:27 AM

To young to have child.
Too late for an abortion.
Drown the infant-bag.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:29 AM

mammaries
like tip-tongue of a bagg
misty water color mammaries
of the way we were

# posted by

newman's own balsamic douche : 9:30 AM

Damn you to hell Duke!
I almost choked on Fritos
From your last Haiku

# posted by

ed : 9:33 AM

Counting and grammar
Are much like oil and water
They simply don't mix

... but oh do I love the haiku

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:33 AM

'Bag suckles on mamm
Bleeth suckles on cancer stick
Both are repulsive!

# posted by

ed : 9:36 AM

Cig sets off alarm.
Sudden deluge drowns the bag.
Hott floats by nature.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:36 AM

She wears wrist-rattle
To entertain the young 'bag
When he's done nursing

# posted by

ed : 9:40 AM

Smoking cigarettes
Exposing boob in a bar
She's one classy chick

# posted by

ed : 9:42 AM

If this bag's a child,
When he reaches a ripe age,
Will he kill himself?

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:43 AM

Oh I love Fridays,
Gotta hit the one hundred
Posts for Haikus

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:45 AM

Girls who smoke annoy.
I never enjoy the kiss
But, she can blow me

# posted by

ed : 9:45 AM

Not California
Illegal to smoke inside
That's why we light bags.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 9:46 AM

The uncouth douchebag
For once learns to say "Yes, Mamm!".
She misunderstands.

# posted by

DarkSock : 9:59 AM

Damn.
She's teh hott.
Nuff, says I.

# posted by

Plague : 10:28 AM

Death, taking my dear life
By boobie suffocation
Is the only way.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 10:34 AM

Clearly she drugged him.
She holds him still while he drifts
To permanent sleep.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 11:05 AM

Euthanization.
Hott feels for the dying bag.
Gives him final lick.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 11:10 AM

2 a.m. Last call.
Rev'rend Horton Heat concert.
Beer goggles in play.

# posted by

Baron Von Goolo : 11:32 AM

After a long day of
Sucking cock for a living,
Mother knows what's best.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 11:49 AM

She's completely broke
and ran out of formula.
I'll pay for service.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 1:46 PM

Crown of fuck-knot hair;
Meth is a hell of a drug.
Then her tits fell off.

# posted by

DarkSock : 2:28 PM

Swap me with douchebag,
Wean him off with a weanie.
He'll grow to like it.

# posted by

Duke of Douchester : 2:54 PM

Technicolor tat
Covering the leprosy
He has no right arm

# posted by

douche equis : 3:23 PM

I fear the creased-midsection lass suffers from Cat Scrote Fever, which explains her preference for Illustrated Lick Douche.

# posted by

Ill Douchy : 4:02 PM

Well, I am relieved;
Winehouse is eating again.
Now back to Rehab.

# posted by

elastic snap hole of the love bear : 4:03 PM

Last dying wish of Tommy Lee wannabe
Lick bosom of a hott
Jessica Alba's skanky grandma will do

# posted by

ye olde douche dyke : 12:03 AM

Wifebeater is old
Must pay stripper so she leaves
Wish I Finished School

# posted by

-RiveR StyX- : 12:31 PM

Single mom must work
Has three kids with no daddy
This man has money

# posted by

-RiveR StyX- : 12:47 PM

Wife pays all the bills
Why does it hurt when I pee?
Wife might like this girl..

# posted by

-RiveR StyX- : 12:53 PM

Stopping by to see
What my best friend's wife does now
I need a lap dance

# posted by

-RiveR StyX- : 12:55 PM

Crystal Meth is great
I've met all sorts of people
Aids test positive

Mom will love this girl
How often does this happen?
I really like her

Strip bar is noisy
Lets find a more private place
Backseat of car fine

Need another hit
Plastic surgery bill high
My life is not good

Tattoo covers tracks
This girl might have some more dope
Gay porn sounds ok

# posted by

-RiveR StyX- : 1:19 PM

Friday, February 22, 2008

Friday Haiku

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