Good work, Melissa! Although it looks like she used a blunt object to hack away at her project's sternum. Why, I wonder?
 

Good work, Melissa! Although it looks like you may have employed a blunt object to hammer away at your subject's sternum. Why, I wonder?
 

So if she based this sculpture on the classics I assume he has as small a wiener as 'David'. Figures, he's obviously compensating for something.
 

I would have called this one "Twister". Look at the frontal ripples - there's like a tornado goin on inside there. Where do his ribs start and his abs end? WHat a mess.

On the other hand the title "Black Hole" could work too - his body might looked deformed because it is being sucked into the singularity in his chest.

The Bag Queen
(Hey - what happened to the nickname option?)
 

this is an unconventional douche...no white belt, no stupid smirk, no bagtoos, no chinpubes, and that monkey he is with isn't even hot; she looks drugged up and just happy to be that close to a penis; all he has is the baglace and shades but at least he is outside; he is the quasi-douche, an interesting specimen; we need to watch out for these; they can be mistaken for non-douches; the bags seem to be evolving everyday; there is no cookie cutter douche anymore..be afraid!!!be very afraid!!!!
 

She looks like she's trying to get a pubic hair outta her throat, and the Arabian Not needs to continue that twist another 270 degrees, rapidly.
 

She hath a manly hand.
 

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the even bigger douche is wearing the baseball cap and red sunglasses in the background.

i really can't comment more on this pic because i am starting to feel a bit sick to my stomach. wait...wait...

he's 5'5" and over-compensating for an incredibly small penis. oh wait....and a stupid necklace he stole from Thor's little brother.


yep. that's all i've got for tonight. and the bag queen is right. this girl has man hands.
 

I don't know about Schnabel. The Pumpy-esque abs, the shirtlessness, the vacant expression have all been done before and seems a bit contrived. Add in the weaponized rosary, this seems to be a paint-by-numbers douche done by an overzealous Thomas Kinkade student. That is a mighty paw by the way, no wonder she took up sculpture.
 

The way the picture was taken and what I am assuming is a black shirt makes the guys forearm look deformed and gimpy. Of course that would just go with the rest of weird post modern sculpture look, sunken chest and ab-ribs
 

this is the kind of pretentious chick i wasted entirely too much time and liquor money on in college
while ther were bleethes on the half shell available for mere two bit cups of natty light...if i had to do it all over again i'd do it all over someone else more often...douche is well playing along and maybe he succeeds where i faiiled...i seemed to be the set up man a lot...so i was a schmuck
but playing to her artistic pretentions makes him an absequious scrote
 

I went through broads like this when I was in art school like a fat kid goes through candy. Hott/not hott is really not an issue to a drunk & horny retard. Personally, I'd do her right now.
I would ask the midget restroom attendant to her left to take a powder while I finish up, but standby with a couple of warm towels. This could get messy...
 

@ The Bag Queen - The nickname option did not disappear, just was changed to the "name/URL" selection.
 

This applies more to the Torch/Syndrome but.. http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/comic.php?d=20080208
 

@shadowspawn - thank you. I get confused easily. I also fear change. ;)
 

oh hell no, this ain't not quasi-douche! the vibe is strong with this one.

First off, there's the fact that he knows just how to pose himself and hold his head for maximum muscle ripplage, while still seeming relaxed. This was practiced often in the mirror behind his bedroom door, before heading out to try it with whatever unimportant hott he could find. It's plain he considers himself the true subject of this photo.

Second, there's that tough-guy necklace/no-shirt combo. He's too tough to need clothes, but never leaves the house without his sacred Amulet Of Studliness. You know why, ladies. Oh yes, you do.

Thirdly, I'm going to go ahead and call douche-mark on his greasy-ass forehead.

Fourth, this photo is tilted. He's doing the head-butt.

Fifth, those are some pretentious fucking sunglasses. Any man that spends more on accessories than I do, and is not homosexual, is a frigging douche.
 

His suicide vest fell off.

Someone help him get it back on.
 

@ Bag Queen:

Do not fear; they are working tirelessly to constantly improve this blogger software.
 

@ Bag Queen:

Do not fear; they are working tirelessly to constantly improve this blogger software.
 

@ Bag Queen:

Do not fear; they are working tirelessly to constantly improve this blogger software.
 

This reminds me of "Caligula" that late 70’s or early 80’s soft core porn made by Bob Guccioni the Hustler Magazine dude. I think that was supposed to be considered art as well but it was just a big gay sex romp like this picture sort of is. If this is art I’m inspired …Inspired to say… “WTF!!!”

Can you imagine how his David-esque wiener looks in that man paw?

It must look like a Vienna sausage in the hand of an adult; I cringe with shrinkage just thinking about it.

I’m willing to bet this artsy chic doesn’t shave her lower regions probably not even her pits. She is a natural beauty and by “natural beauty”… I mean you’ll be coughing up pubes if you lick the puntang.
 

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Much like the Golem of Hebrew legend, this beast needs to be put down. Somebody please erase the first aleph from the name of God from his body, changing him from Emet to Met. Alternatively, put a slip of paper in his mouth that says, "Kill yourself."
 

She looks like her name is Ruth and she has a frisbee-sized bush.
 

I envy his body. Only because if I had that body I would lay down on my back, and fill my chest cavity with milk and cornpops and enjoy my cereal and cartoons without the nuisance of a bowl.
 

I still say he has a mild case of doucheitis...unless you give him bonus points for being Persian...then, I will give douche where douche is due
 

i agree with the frisbee sized bush unipooper...i also suspect armpit hair substantial enough to be used as hand grips for really deep penetration despite having sweaty sex on her inevitable waterbed in her un-airconditioned apartment...
 

4 words:

Hollywood actor Beck Bristow.