Fuckin Rehab..........

It should win a 2008 Douchey for greasiest place on earth.
 

Are you sure this guy is not staying at the IP daily?
 

No Bruno! Do not disembowel the hott! Bad douche!
 

I thought Vanilla Ice was retired.
 

no, no, no. Vanilla Ice is 'Retarded'.
 

wilhem defoe movies from here on out will need an asterisk for hgh abuse..bleeth was once an honest 6 1/2 not she might be an 8 but its a
paid for 8
 

Is Joey P attempting a bi-cep flex?

I bet in person Joey P is actually really nice and desperate for approval if you seem in any way cool or "in the know"

Army of Douche-ness
 

Let's see how many bandanas we can fit on a douche!
 

take note db1. it's official. the wristdanna is the first must have accessory of 2008. Red seems to be the most popular color so far. But it's still early.
 

p.s. i really hope the joey porsche army runs into the muhammed armored hum-vee death squad.
 

Where was JP in that picture? Damn you too-effective camouflage!
 

I love trying to decipher douche tattoos. Lemme see here...

The two roses symbolize his love for his thai manboy, Patek. The piano keys surrounding the roses symbolize his love for Elton John songs.
The strange design below that is for his love of flying buttresses.

The hott symbolizes my love for boobies.
 

Joey Porche is like a nice cheese. He just keeps getting better and better the older he gets. I am actually starting to feel sorry for Joey P. I must be getting soft.
 

"When Tribal Tattoos Go Bad" I'm not quite sure wtf is going on with his arm. Its like a tribal blade turned into some roses, with some weird sun ray thingies. Odd. At least he's a hardcore American. What with the stars (and presumably stripes) bandanna UNDER HIS HAT, the camo hat, and then the lovely red and white wristdanna. I'm not sure if there's glitter on it or if that's just weird lighting.

Ummm, I don't think your lady friend here is a robot, so you can stop looking for her power button.
 

At least its not a boob grab...
 

Is that chick's head photoshopped?
 

this is why you should never swim at the pool at the hard rock. christ, have you seen the film around the lip of the pool?
 

Reminds me of the age-old riddle, which came first...the chin tuck or the boob job?
 

Reminds me of the age-old riddle, which came first...the chin tuck or the boob job?
 

"an' when I squeeze here she makes dat pootin' sound...do it again, baby, do it. DO IT."

The tattoo on his shoulder of two roses being shoved up CP30's asshole is rather nice.

Camouflage for Joey P would be a shirt made out of dicks.
 

he smiled and his face cracked. but he is smiling because he stoled phaf's thatched grass leg
 

he's about to demonstrate gall bladder removal by use of an opposable digit
 

Pfah's left eye is made of glass and full of spearmint tic tacs
 

Nice dirty trick DB1, throwing in the Joey Porsche crew slider at the end.

As if another polluted Rehab scene wasn't enough....you ladle on grease. It's like a DOUBLE kick to the groin.
 

Even the multiple bandanas can't stop this greaseball from contaminating the pool. I'm thinking these ones deserve each other though. She'd be a 5 without those huge fakes, not cute at all.
 

@anon4:10....well, that explains my constant nagging headache and rattling noise in my head.
 

I want a Joey Porsche website...no scratch that, a joey porsche 24 hour reality channel. I must be addicted to douche cause I cannot resist all that is joey porsche
 

@ashfish - Definitely some glitter. And I do see some signs of pride in our U.S. and A. But why the grimace when he's next to such nice boobies?
 

I had that tattoo design on a trapper-keeper in the fourth grade.
 

He is her smallpox-infected blanket.
 

This photo is just to prime you for all the photos coming from the Winter Music Festival in Miami.

I was there last year and that town is loaded with photo opportunities. Remember the "Napkin Night" photos??
 

is it just me, or does the joey porsche experience look like they're trying to be a breakdancing crew? i think they just got back from performing on the Promenade. now they need to recruit turbo so they can finally take down Electro Rock.
 

*Music starts. Scenes of Apache soaring over ocean and Humvee splashing across muddy creek.*

*Douchebag appears on screen*

Joey Porsche: "This weekend, while on patrol, I was teabagged by men from three different squads. And I also learned to use Appletini as a lubricant."

*Douchebag changes from camo gear into pink IZOD. Sprays body. Pops collar. *

"THAT got me ready to do battle on Monday!"

Voiceover: The Army Reserve: Not your everyday job.
 

this picture on reaffirms my decision to not go to REHAB while in Vegas.

don't try to change my mind. you'll find me playing blackjack.
 

hey, has anyone else seen this myspace page?

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=202051424

someone hates Joey. and the background picture is ridiculously funny. and, more than likely, true.
 

yes, snot-wad i did see that page.

and how is your leg?
 

pfah maybe they are trying to help him...those closet doors can get stuck...
 

pfah once went down on steve largent at a merle haggard concert.
 

pfah mouth-fucked Bea Arthur in front of a solidly packed stadium of 6,000 year Christian Mormons.

then he did this:

naughty.
 

"I love the smell of blue balls in the morning"
 

While Vin DieselBag has nearly perfected the outward appearance of a poolside douche, a closer inspection reveals otherwise.

For starters, he does not have any facial pubes. In fact it appears he just shaved off a pathetic handlebar mustache since he wasn't feeling douchey enough to pull it off. More telling is the way he is holding his hott - it's as if he's shielding her from the advances of the cameraman. And judging by the hott's facial expression and disinterest in him, he might have something to worry about.

I sense a deeper insecurity in this bag, like douching it up does not come naturally to him. The best he can do is flaunt his sister around as his hott to disguise his the fact he is gay.

If she were my sister I would flaunt her around and happily take it in the ass from bubba in the pen after getting prosecuted for violating state and federal incest statutes.
 

ok...there is a subtext here we need to redirect...db deosn't have the same stash of quality scrote hottie combos...i think we need to help...now i don't leave the bomb shelter except on gubment check day
ok i admit its the basement of my mom's bomb shelter...but i am willing to try i can enable my cell to take pics...but i was thinking what are the rules on pulling pics from various sites...
 

Sir! Private First Class Douchebag reporting in, sir! We have successfully infiltrated the Douchiest Place on Earth and are reconnoitering! I am disguised with nothing more than a hat, two bandannas and the gigantic stick-on tattoo found in my gear bag! I will attempt contact again at 0130 using the communicators installed in PFC Funbags!

Douchebag Out!
 

Y'know, maybe I just haven't had coffee yet and I'm cranky as hell, but seeing the Porsche party posse in camo strikes me as an insult to the men and women wearing it for real in Afghanistan and Iraq.

With four more soldiers killed by a roadside bomb yesterday, the sight of these turds playing dress-up pisses me off. Same goes for the scrotes wearing the dog tag bling. While their peers are actually putting their lives on the line every minute, I'm finding less and less tolerance for the boys who live for the club life co-opting faux-military style as just another means to get laid on a Friday night.

Okay. Got that off my chest. Now I need coffee.
 

@anon9:17....i'm not a fan of Merle Haggard, so that never happened. besides, Steve's family, and that wouldn't only be gross, it'd be some form of incest.
 

O great, now there are fake anon's assailing Pfah (who btw wears socks made out of band-aids and sleeps in gelatin); I fear I have awoken a sleeping giant.

- tic tac/bacon/thatch/horse anon, aka DarkSock
 

@senor squash

I hear ya. In fact, aren't the robots they use to disarm roadside bombs kind of expensive? I'd be O.K. if we saved some coin and used the Joey P crew. Sure, they're probably only good for one use--maybe two if it turns out that urine and tears disarm bombs--but I'm O.K. with it.
 

@darksock...i figured it was you. it read like your genius prose. nice work brother. especially the 'living in a horse'.
 

It was my nerve pills. Mmmmmm - nerve pills.
 

She doesn't have the heart to tell him that's not her clitoris.
 

OK ... this is probably not the best place to admit it but I am a big JoeyP fan .. I agree with anon @ 2:28 about him probably being an alright dude in person. Joey showed up on the AZ ripoff blog not too long ago where he was viewing his own pic displayed on that site. He looked like he was enjoying it. You gotta give a dude credit for owning his douche-ness, camo or not .. come on, he is just 20 y/o and a product of his Jerzy enviroment! Wonder if he knows about his celebrity status here? BTW he let his 5500 myspace friends know that he will "in Miami until April." Since he was smart enough to remove all photo's with chicks from his myspace page, someone catch him live and in action in Miami ... PLEEEEASE?!!!
 

As someone who has actually worn the uniform of the armed forces of this country, these wannabe cammo wearing douches don't offend as much as annoy. Like all phony patriots they don't have the courage of their convictions to actually "do something" but will always tell everyone within earshot about how tough they are.

I have said before that there should be vans of government goons roaming the streets of Greater Jersey/LI, CHI, Dallas, Miami, Vegas and LA to round up all the cammo 'bags and ship 'em directly to Basra or the Hindu Kush. The same govt. program will also round up all wiggas and drop them off in the South Bronx, Gary, IN or South Central LA depending on proximity. Who says government bureaucracy can't deliver effective societal benefits.