Wowzers that's some hott. I'd let Farmer Jill milk my prostate at 4 in the morning anytime. it's nice to know that this idiot seems to be allergic to hotts, maybe they are developing resistance. Evolution works!
 

exxon valdouche!! hes leaking douche everywhere!
 

Now that pumpy's gone is this the type of douche that the hott's go for? This choade could fit in pumpy's left shoe.
This picture is a true sign that the end is near!
 

Maybe Bob Douchan wrote her some poetry about being a rolling stone with a lips tatoo and hanging out near a bike rental shop.

As far as this hot, is her vajayjay only 0.5 inches long? Smallest golden triangle ever?
 

kissy lips tattoo? really?
what makes a man walk into a tattoo shop and go, "scuse me chief, set me up with a permanent reminder of my man's love. spare no expense."

worst. tattoo. ever.

she is the strawberry shortcake ise cream treat that i would slowly enjoy over a fortnight.
and then go back for seconds.

big sunglasses are for girls.
 

make that ice cream.

not ise.

she distracted me, it's all her fault.
 

beach cruiser bikes are so damn cool.
 

Is it 'Skanks With Douchebags' day? I feel dirty.
 

The Bleethe-to-Douche factor is well over 3.6 today.
 

Throw him back, and chain yourself to him.
 

Quick someone drink a six-pack we need to stop this uh thing before he reaches the mainland
 

Apparently living on the beach and swiming in the ocean hasn't served to give either of them a tan, a set of pectoral muscles or an ass.

these are by far the laziest surf bums ever.
 

How does he walk upright with his pants that low?

On second thought, who cares, just light him on fire please.
 

taint measurement?

1,2,3 pop bottles.

take one down pass it around, 1,2 pop bottles
 

I wonder what it is like to be as cool as this guy? What rad tats dude! Cool Chuck Taylors on the beach.

Oh this bleeth must be a real pain in the arschen.

What the fuck is a pop bottle andwhy would you measure a taint with it?
 

My retina is burning.

The hott...oh wait, there isn't one. This bitch can paint my house anytime and by house I mean give me a rim job with her dirty tongue.

As for the bob douche-an offending rocker, I'd punch him in the face, but if I hit his lower lips, not that low, I'm sure I could get his heart to skip a beat.

This picture is the equivalent of mixing bleach and ammonia...deadly douche and bleeth gas...
 

@ anon 10:01

It's a HJBBAD thang.

You wouldn't understand.
 

Has either of these two ever seen a gym? That thing on his head looks like something I pulled out of my drain. Hott is soft as hell with a marshmallow belly and the skinniest legs I've seen on a post-pubescent. His head is out of proportion the way a toddler's is. Must be the Gumby variant of the Scrote virus.

Gumby Douche got his shades from an old Karmann Ghia at the junk yard.
 

Anon 10:01, the whole world is wondering what the hell a 1,2,3 Pop Bottles is. We just assume it's used to measure a taint. If you would like to set up an exploratory committe with a Blue Ribbon Panel of experts at the Boca Sheraton, I'm sure that we could find interest in your findings. DB1 may be willing to sponsor the symposium and publish your report.
 

May I be so bold as to suggest that Blondie is as douchey as her gelled-up pal? Just look at that bandana! Axl Rose called, he want's his hairstyle back. Also, the bikini bottom tug? Please.
 

@ BLEETHLVR:

The large head is a classic sign of Hydrocephalus (aka Water on the brain).

It's also characterized by a gay-ass side torso tat.
 

"Asswipe" is the only thing that comes to mind here.

Oh, and boobies.
 

The Little People of America Association ( http://www.lpaonline.org/mc/page.do ) called; they want their short legs and long torsoes back.
 

She is not even on the same elevator with Yak's hott.
 

Bag Eyes, I believe that tatt is a thoughtful thing he's done for whomever is stroking him... just something interesting to look at to break up the ennui. Plus maybe some targets for his spurt. Ooops, did I just go to far?

Doucetorious, you are spot on. This chick is attractive but not up to par.
 

His belt is so sparkly. I wonder what other skank planted that lipstick on his chest, cause the one in this pic isnt wearing that shade. Nice flowers man, really dig them. His tattoo artist saw this douchebag coming a mile away so he charged him an arm and a leg for the outline, but he worked out a deal to just give up the lower portion of his legs but added a blow job. I feel like feeding the hott something really fatty so maybe it'll go to her legs.
 

These two are a serious blue plate special of moose turds, encrusted with bits of fly larvae and even with small amounts of maggots crawling on them and noticible amounts of miniscule wing insects hovering above. With a gay-ass lips body ink. either flush them or set them on fire.
 

Ok... I can't take it any longer. Dare I ask what the hell a "taint" is? I've been afraid to ask until now.

Someone?
 

the taint would be the little skin seam that exists in the region between the vagina and the asshole.

now go about your business.
nothing to see here.
 

not to be picky, but....

wouldn't it make more sense if it was: 3, 2, 1, pop bottles?
 

Queen I am sorry you have been exposed to such words as Taint and such. Shame on you fellas.
 

3,2,1 pop bottles on this guys freakin head... Jesus Christ this "man" has the body of ET. Ive seen more muscular guys on a documentary of Somalians. Someone tell this cracked out James Blunt reject to put a shirt on before he gives Grandma Betty at the beach an aneurism...
 

Baggie Q, the taint exists on men as well, between the anus and scrotum. Tastefully mentioned in HBO's Deadwood, Season 1 I believe, when Swearingin needs to pass gall stones.
 

This pathetic excuse of not only a man but a human being in general is like the man version of Nicole Ritchie after throwing up several times a day for about 2 years in a row.

He has the head of a man in his twenties but the body of a malnurished 5 year old starved sweat shop worker.

I bet this cute little blondie sadly but truly triples this side show's weight.
 

Now this is just wrong on so many levels. Farmer Teds douche quotient is all over the map. I mean from wearing jeans to the beach, the horrific ink work, the boy chest, the dirt on his face, the rooster hair, and the female sunglasses WTF? Besides worst of all he looks dirty and I can smell him from my desk.

Skankie hot is a mess as well but somehow she still looks cute. The kind of girl that would ride you six ways to Sunday before Daddie got home from making the moonshine.
How any female let alone a hot would let this scrote within ten feet of her is beyond me. I guess these two will just have a blast living in that shack, renting bikes, and shagging in the port-o-potty. Who said mankind isnt deevolving.
 

him i would club like a baby seal
her i would grudgefuck to paris hilton's songs
this is the essential hotchick with douchebag
 

hey, if he's a creature he may be worth saving

she is worth paving, with my waist rod
 

Attention Valdouche:
Please walk slowly across the PCH this afternoon so somebody can hit you at approximately 60 mph.

This female distincly reminds me of a stripper that tattooed Bret Micheals name on her neck. Am I wrong?
 

what the fuck is on her feet?
that shit ain't cute.
 

pfah, I believe the 1,2,3 or 3,2,1 debate was raised in Episode One of HJBB&D. Don't bother checking, just ask Baggie Q, she'll remember for sure. My sense is that the 1,2,3 is more senseless and, thereby, most appropriate to belong to our Cult Hero.
 

What we have with this fellow is lung butter cast into human form. He radiates douche for at least a 20 foot radius, skuzzifying anyone or anything that comes close.

She, on the other hand, is a delectable confection. Even covered with sand. She projects that delightful combination of extreme cuteness and majorly hott naughtiness. To sum up - I would 'go there.' Big time.

Pardon me, but I have a small mess to clean up.......
 

Ethiopia is holding on line 1. Something about wanting its physique back.
 

Crap. Darksock, you rascally varmint. You got in ahead of me. By a mere 12 hours. That's what I get for not reading the comments first.
 

"My Name Is Earl-Summer Vacation"

BTW 1,2,3 pop bottles = 3 bottles of bubbly