Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Wednesday Limerick
There was an alien warlord so weak,
With an oblique, late Greek, physique,
He search out Tom Cruise,
to find a new muse,
While the brunette let out a sweet little squeak.
# posted by Douchebag1 @ 8:28 AM 
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Lord Xenu has gathered two hotts
To touch him in his favorite spots
They stroke his tattoos
While he purrs and he coos
Then he'll chow then down like tater tots
To touch him in his favorite spots
They stroke his tattoos
While he purrs and he coos
Then he'll chow then down like tater tots
xenu can pout with the best,
so don't try, cause you'll fail the test,
just turn, and take hike,
or you'll end up on pike,
with your head, lord xenu just messed.
so don't try, cause you'll fail the test,
just turn, and take hike,
or you'll end up on pike,
with your head, lord xenu just messed.
There once was a douche named Xenu
who soiled red velvet banquets with his man goo
The Bleeths he did tease with tattoos and sleeze
untill last call came ...oh boo hoo
who soiled red velvet banquets with his man goo
The Bleeths he did tease with tattoos and sleeze
untill last call came ...oh boo hoo
# posted by 
: 8:15 AM
: 8:15 AM
hail xenu, the lord of the asses
just don't make no fun of his glasses
he'll snap you in two
down your neck he'll poo
then display you in front of the masses
just don't make no fun of his glasses
he'll snap you in two
down your neck he'll poo
then display you in front of the masses
Xenu can run but can't hide
Hunters will search far and wide
They'll throw the smack down
On that outrageous assclown
Brunette will then join our side
Hunters will search far and wide
They'll throw the smack down
On that outrageous assclown
Brunette will then join our side
if you look close, unders xenu's chin pubes
amongst all his other tattoos
is the phrase "carpe diem"
look hard! you will see 'em
wonder what he'll sieze from these two?
amongst all his other tattoos
is the phrase "carpe diem"
look hard! you will see 'em
wonder what he'll sieze from these two?
oh blondie, don't kiss xenu's grease
you mark yourself as his next piece
there's no shadow of doubt
that tomorrow YOU'LL pout
cause your self-respect is now deceased
you mark yourself as his next piece
there's no shadow of doubt
that tomorrow YOU'LL pout
cause your self-respect is now deceased
The mighty warrior Xenu shan't be messed with.
Of his HoS ass, you're not worthy of a whiff.
Or so Eileen and Laura think.
They've had too much to drink.
For Xenu is just a tatt practice area that lifts.
-Amerigo Vesdouchey
Of his HoS ass, you're not worthy of a whiff.
Or so Eileen and Laura think.
They've had too much to drink.
For Xenu is just a tatt practice area that lifts.
-Amerigo Vesdouchey
# posted by : 8:33 AM
: 8:33 AM
that lord xenu's one hell of a guy
though i don't know why he'd wear a tie
because cleaning commodes
don't require dress codes
on nights off, he just wants to look fly
though i don't know why he'd wear a tie
because cleaning commodes
don't require dress codes
on nights off, he just wants to look fly
Greetings from Middle-earth!
Lord Xenu was once with a dame,
Who's friend found him utterly lame.
They thought it was funny,
Plus needed the money,
So they made him believe he had game.
Lord Xenu was once with a dame,
Who's friend found him utterly lame.
They thought it was funny,
Plus needed the money,
So they made him believe he had game.
Oh god not him again
baghunter's lives are so grim
We said with dismay
as DB laughed away
Xenu has a beagle for a chin
baghunter's lives are so grim
We said with dismay
as DB laughed away
Xenu has a beagle for a chin
Airplane Toilet’s are not a place to dip your head
The blue water will certainly turn your hair red.
Large chunks of shit you search the bowl for
You are on freaking sick manwhore
The blue water will certainly turn your hair red.
Large chunks of shit you search the bowl for
You are on freaking sick manwhore
# posted by : 8:41 AM
: 8:41 AM
Once was a sad comb
who had not a home.
'til Douche he did find
to settle his mind.
Now they both get together
for a friendly comb over.
who had not a home.
'til Douche he did find
to settle his mind.
Now they both get together
for a friendly comb over.
# posted by : 8:41 AM
: 8:41 AM
Post five hundred wasn't enough
to keep Lord Xenu from getting rough
So off our admin flew
conjuring another pile of goo,
his next pic will be in the buff
to keep Lord Xenu from getting rough
So off our admin flew
conjuring another pile of goo,
his next pic will be in the buff
lord xenu emerged from the sky
with a shriek that made all babies cry
Tom Cruise he did scurry
"Please bless the baby Suri"
Xenu ate it with mustard on rye
with a shriek that made all babies cry
Tom Cruise he did scurry
"Please bless the baby Suri"
Xenu ate it with mustard on rye
tonight, xenu summons the thunder
these two lasses whose asses he'll plunder
when he's through with these two
they'll have lower i.q.
"is he gentle?" no longer they'll wonder
these two lasses whose asses he'll plunder
when he's through with these two
they'll have lower i.q.
"is he gentle?" no longer they'll wonder
xenu's insatiable appetite for kids
he eats them like cartons of dibs
their meat is so tender
no matter what gender
he's the #1 cause of sids
he eats them like cartons of dibs
their meat is so tender
no matter what gender
he's the #1 cause of sids
Greetings (again) from Middle-earth!
What could have Lord Xenu been thinking
When he juiced up without even blinking?
With his violet hair,
And his chest scorched with nair,
Hotties soon will know what has been shrinking.
What could have Lord Xenu been thinking
When he juiced up without even blinking?
With his violet hair,
And his chest scorched with nair,
Hotties soon will know what has been shrinking.
Xenu likes stacks of pancakes
pancakes that are made from snakes
he uses a syrup
made from the jizz on his stirrups
and asks these hotts to partake
pancakes that are made from snakes
he uses a syrup
made from the jizz on his stirrups
and asks these hotts to partake
I find this commingling to revolting to think,
Two coeds cuddling Xenu, I must drink.
He looks greasy and smelly,
Double chin and fat belly,
Must be a joke, brunette's ready to wink.
Two coeds cuddling Xenu, I must drink.
He looks greasy and smelly,
Double chin and fat belly,
Must be a joke, brunette's ready to wink.
Greetings (yet again) from Middle-earth!
Lord Xenu has shown no remorse,
For the look that he seems to endorse,
The hotties are smitten,
Like some yarn on a kitten,
By the douche who would beat them with force.
Lord Xenu has shown no remorse,
For the look that he seems to endorse,
The hotties are smitten,
Like some yarn on a kitten,
By the douche who would beat them with force.
scientologists owe xenu praise
and worship for all of his days
he gives them direction
and for his protection
their first born, to xenu, they raise
and worship for all of his days
he gives them direction
and for his protection
their first born, to xenu, they raise
All hail the High Lord Xenu,
Who sits on a throne of hot cat poo.
Of Axe doth he smell,
Has bitches for lapels,
And a fucked up two-tone douche hair-do.
Who sits on a throne of hot cat poo.
Of Axe doth he smell,
Has bitches for lapels,
And a fucked up two-tone douche hair-do.
xenu came from teegeeack
with a massive cock and pee pee sack
what a buncha bullshit
from the mind of a twit
l. ron hubbard, a complete maniac
with a massive cock and pee pee sack
what a buncha bullshit
from the mind of a twit
l. ron hubbard, a complete maniac
Baby Suri saw Xenu and got scared,
"Look at that mother fuckers hair."
she was heard to exclaim
displaying no shame
cuz her parents are both mentally impaired
thx bcs
"Look at that mother fuckers hair."
she was heard to exclaim
displaying no shame
cuz her parents are both mentally impaired
thx bcs
500+ posts Xenu was given
much traffic to our site was driven
but Xenu still pouted
so we all stood up and shouted
"All hail Xenu! You're forgiven!"
much traffic to our site was driven
but Xenu still pouted
so we all stood up and shouted
"All hail Xenu! You're forgiven!"
on a bender of pills and much booze
l. ron hubbard discovered his ruse
conjured up xenu's form
and a media storm
to ensnare stupid twats like tom cruise
l. ron hubbard discovered his ruse
conjured up xenu's form
and a media storm
to ensnare stupid twats like tom cruise
so we all know that tom cruise is gay
"where did suri come from?" heard you say
it was xenu's man gravy
that impregnated poor katie
you think tom would fuck kate? there's no way
"where did suri come from?" heard you say
it was xenu's man gravy
that impregnated poor katie
you think tom would fuck kate? there's no way
All hail! King Xenu returns
Bringing surprises, we don't know
His presence is all we need
For his costume is the show
All hail, as he makes us bleed
Bringing surprises, we don't know
His presence is all we need
For his costume is the show
All hail, as he makes us bleed
# posted by : 9:14 AM
: 9:14 AM
baby suri made excellent stew
as xenu burned her like an auschwitz jew
"What a lovely dish,
you taste so delish!"
He exclaimed, but then started to poo
baby top gun
has given him the runs
"oh no it seems suri,
is much like curry!"
as brown liquid flew out of his buns
"That's what you get squid
for eating my kid"
said the chick from the creek
as bcs' work week
was reduced to writing limericks about burning children like jews in the holocaust
as xenu burned her like an auschwitz jew
"What a lovely dish,
you taste so delish!"
He exclaimed, but then started to poo
baby top gun
has given him the runs
"oh no it seems suri,
is much like curry!"
as brown liquid flew out of his buns
"That's what you get squid
for eating my kid"
said the chick from the creek
as bcs' work week
was reduced to writing limericks about burning children like jews in the holocaust
Greetings (more and more) from Middle-earth!
OK, I just really have to point out, this guy transcends douchosity onto a whole new level of scrote. I can't even begin to fathom the kind of dedication it takes to go that route.
Now for my last limerick of the day:
Dear Xenu, you look like a mess,
For fuck's sake you can't even dress,
Go back to your roots
With your silver space suits
You look like a fag in distress.
OK, I just really have to point out, this guy transcends douchosity onto a whole new level of scrote. I can't even begin to fathom the kind of dedication it takes to go that route.
Now for my last limerick of the day:
Dear Xenu, you look like a mess,
For fuck's sake you can't even dress,
Go back to your roots
With your silver space suits
You look like a fag in distress.
Here is another pic:
http://a895.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/88/m_0966ab9c578fc9c3f8e7bd5224841c6e.jpg
'prince of oakville' near toronto.
http://a895.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/88/m_0966ab9c578fc9c3f8e7bd5224841c6e.jpg
'prince of oakville' near toronto.
# posted by : 9:44 AM
: 9:44 AM
this limerick pic confuses
like d.t. hottie sis amuses
sam fox prefers sushi plate
now chris hitchens is straight
but elvis alter ego he abuses
like d.t. hottie sis amuses
sam fox prefers sushi plate
now chris hitchens is straight
but elvis alter ego he abuses
# posted by : 9:49 AM
: 9:49 AM
xenu's teeth are titanium blades
he hides laser beam eyes behind shades
he wears badgers for shoes
and on babies he chews
over bald spot his dyed hair cascades
he hides laser beam eyes behind shades
he wears badgers for shoes
and on babies he chews
over bald spot his dyed hair cascades
Xenu looks like he would love
A fist in his ass with a shove
His chicks are hot
But clearly they're not
Naked like those from above
A fist in his ass with a shove
His chicks are hot
But clearly they're not
Naked like those from above
adamantium makes xenu's bones
(it's much harder to make into clones)
picks his teeth with a rake
takes a bath in bleach lake
took the locker back from davy jones
(it's much harder to make into clones)
picks his teeth with a rake
takes a bath in bleach lake
took the locker back from davy jones
I missed yesterday's Xenu thread
I worked out of the office instead
Xenu irritates
By the will of the Fates
He should end up like Pulp Fiction's Zed
I worked out of the office instead
Xenu irritates
By the will of the Fates
He should end up like Pulp Fiction's Zed
There once lived an Oompa faced scrote,
upon which two hots they did dote,
on four legs like Rover
They grabbed his comb over,
And screamed "pound me hard, Jud Heathcote"
upon which two hots they did dote,
on four legs like Rover
They grabbed his comb over,
And screamed "pound me hard, Jud Heathcote"
A baseball bat to the head
Would not hurt Xenu it is said
He would grab it in jest
Swat at you like a pest
Then fuck his own ass til it bled
Would not hurt Xenu it is said
He would grab it in jest
Swat at you like a pest
Then fuck his own ass til it bled
"Weekend At Bernies" Remade
For Jersey's Douchiest Accolade
Random Hotts
Look like Fembots
Holding Up Xenu's Beat Shades
For Jersey's Douchiest Accolade
Random Hotts
Look like Fembots
Holding Up Xenu's Beat Shades
# posted by : 10:23 AM
: 10:23 AM
There once was an Old One named Xenu
Rehab was a nugget in his poo.
Nothing could scare him
As he amassed a large harem,
And turned his cock into a petting zoo.
Rehab was a nugget in his poo.
Nothing could scare him
As he amassed a large harem,
And turned his cock into a petting zoo.
I just have to voice how upset I am Xenu is back.
Sometimes, when I'm feeling really bad about myself, I'll look in the HoS at Xenu. It usually is the final push to drive the needle into my vein that I needed.
This fucktard should not exist. I actually believe he's an alien, for the sake of humanity. The fact that he cuddles with cuddly trim makes me want to go Sweeney Todd on my wrists.
Sometimes, when I'm feeling really bad about myself, I'll look in the HoS at Xenu. It usually is the final push to drive the needle into my vein that I needed.
This fucktard should not exist. I actually believe he's an alien, for the sake of humanity. The fact that he cuddles with cuddly trim makes me want to go Sweeney Todd on my wrists.
In the two thousandth year of our Lord
Xenu appeared from the fjord
He's now matured
Our senses raptured
So I'm beating my eyes with a board.
Xenu appeared from the fjord
He's now matured
Our senses raptured
So I'm beating my eyes with a board.
He’s the stuff of legends and lore
He both the future and days of yore
For hotts he’s a-lusting
While looking disgusting
It’s his Power of Scrote I deplore
Oh Xenu of L. Ronald Hubbard
You’ve got us all kind of flubbard
You look like slimes
But pull in the dimes
In fear I’ll go hid in the cupboard
These hotts can sense all your powers
They’ve notched many since losing their flowers
Oh yes you can pull
Though these I’d cull
Over us mortals your essence so towers
He both the future and days of yore
For hotts he’s a-lusting
While looking disgusting
It’s his Power of Scrote I deplore
Oh Xenu of L. Ronald Hubbard
You’ve got us all kind of flubbard
You look like slimes
But pull in the dimes
In fear I’ll go hid in the cupboard
These hotts can sense all your powers
They’ve notched many since losing their flowers
Oh yes you can pull
Though these I’d cull
Over us mortals your essence so towers
Just like I once saw in Nantucket
Belushi had hotts there to suck it
But this douche was drunk
and those hotts wont drink spunk
while he cries chunky words in a bucket
Belushi had hotts there to suck it
But this douche was drunk
and those hotts wont drink spunk
while he cries chunky words in a bucket
# posted by : 11:07 AM
: 11:07 AM
I'll try my hand at one........
There once was a scrote named Xenu
Who was all over a site that we knew
He looks to be from another planet
Stupid pout glasses and chest tats, I can't stand it!
I hope they take a knife to what he pees through
There once was a scrote named Xenu
Who was all over a site that we knew
He looks to be from another planet
Stupid pout glasses and chest tats, I can't stand it!
I hope they take a knife to what he pees through
# posted by : 11:47 AM
: 11:47 AM
Douche b.a.g.
3 feet
3 feet
2 feet
2 feet
3 feet
You can take some license but too much gets sloppy.
White, ed's and bcs's first are great examples. Mine felt sloppy.
3 feet
3 feet
2 feet
2 feet
3 feet
You can take some license but too much gets sloppy.
White, ed's and bcs's first are great examples. Mine felt sloppy.
There was a b.a.g. from Japan
Whose limericks never would scan.
When asked why this was,
He answered "because
I always try to fit as many syllables into the last line as ever possibly I can."
Whose limericks never would scan.
When asked why this was,
He answered "because
I always try to fit as many syllables into the last line as ever possibly I can."
# posted by : 1:56 PM
: 1:56 PM
Bleeth905 is correct
Where rhythm and form intersect
Is the limerick sublime
If you just take the time
Though perfection is hard to perfect
Where rhythm and form intersect
Is the limerick sublime
If you just take the time
Though perfection is hard to perfect
Two hotties this creature has mauled.
Hairless chest the wax it did scald.
Blondie in red
should be in my bed
This forward-combing fucker is BALD.
-grimatongueworm
Hairless chest the wax it did scald.
Blondie in red
should be in my bed
This forward-combing fucker is BALD.
-grimatongueworm
# posted by : 8:59 PM
: 8:59 PM
there once was a bag with a tie,
who had axed up his chest and his fly
when the bars yielded no gurls
he then trolled the highschools...
because it's a shame to waste this spanish fly!
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who had axed up his chest and his fly
when the bars yielded no gurls
he then trolled the highschools...
because it's a shame to waste this spanish fly!
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