Benny looks a bit like Moby.

It would appear he snatched that necklace down from a beaded curtain for quick impromptu accessorizin'. BUtton the shirt geek.

All four ladies are pretty darn cute, but Stacy Gold Hott on the left & Winona Ryder/Uma Thurman Hybrid Hott on the right have extra sassy puckers. For my money this makes their sorority ambience even more humpable than the two that are actually touching the 'Bag. Perhaps the intensity of the 'Bag Aura has already begun to take effect upon them. So sad.
 

Wow, thought they were at a bar until I noticed the three URCs. This is clearly in Benny's mother's basement. Note the leather sofa with the mirror behind it, and the desk with the laptop on it reflected in the mirror. The mirror is also good for examining the extent of Benny's male pattern baldness. Not quite sure what Benny's up to, but I can guarantee he used his go-to "I'm a Russian cosmonaut" line to get things going.

As for the hotts, fairly non-descript. Three have their eyes closed. All four of their faces are similarly contorted. The eyes of the only one looking at the camera silently scream for help. All are potential jailbait.

Benny, time to get your own place and stop spiking the kool-aid.

Viva La Revolucion
 

At least Rob Halford's son didn't follow in his Daddy's footsteps. I could use me summa that right about now as having a hard time...getting...up...
 

It seems staged.
 

But we must at the same time examime the entire picture. Somehow, this pasty skinned bald headed doofus has attracted 4 hotts to his immediate vicinity. While the usual case for attraction on HCWDB.com is either blatantly related to money (all those skin oranging treatments are spendy..) or physical attraction (if you could sever the head of many of the scrotes on the site from their douche clad bodies, you would still, in many cases, have an attractive head.)

Benny however, clearly has neither the cash a homeless man can accumulate at roosevelt field mall on a busy sunday, nor the looks god gave to a grapefruit. And still, the hotts come.

I say bottle it, and sell it to the non douche among us.

Or better yet, analyze it, and come up with a patch/requsite 12 step program of rehabilitation.
 

the infamous Red Cup and his progeny make an appearance.

so what happened in this pic? Staged? Naw.

Benny sprang for bottle service (Colt 45 malt liqueur) at teh Wisconsin college bar and the bottle hoes flock, willing Red Cups in hand.
 

Benny was the bouncer at the palais de dance
Hed slash your grannys face up given half a chance.
Hed sell you back the pieces, all for less than half a quid
- NOT
 

where the fuck is chris hansen? i don't understand this picture, it vexes me. i'm thoroughly vexed.
 

Benny (a.k.a. Nosferadouche) captures the souls of young hotts and ceremonially deposits them in the urn located directly behind him.

- Douchey Smurf
 

Quite simply, Benny is Benny Abramovich Polutskin. The pauper look easily explained by the fact that he's a greased up Russian pimp with bad taste in clothes, style, and dignity. Presence of ubiquitous red cup further enlightens us to the fact that Benny probably raped the motherland during the fall of the empire, quite possibly coming to Brooklyn in 1993 to set up shop, opening up his seedy dive where Young Russian beauties work for rent and customers spend vast sums of money to drink his watered down vodka and dance with the girls. Ubiquitous red cup further tells us Benny is a wise entrepreneur, never allowing the girls to drink vodka on shift. Ah Benny, cheers to you living the American Dream, and yet embodying the creeping American Nightmare you fucking wank.
 

Benny must have induced some kind of hypnosis on these vulnerable hotts; same languid faces, same body postures. But perhaps, Benny himself has fallen into the same hypnosis; same languid face with his lips puckered for any kind of popsicle.
 

Good Rob Halford reference Labaglia. I am convinced that our douche will certainly be "Breakin' The Law" if he lays one greasy finger on any of these 10th graders.

Was this a staged photo-op? One look at the terrified hostage to his immediate left says it all: "If I pose for this picture will you PROMISE not to tell my parents that you saw me here at this party???"
 

Red cup, Red cup.
Have you any beer?
Yes sir, Yes sir.
But this guy's queer.


Your Mom's K-Y
 

This douche plays keyboards for a Cheap Trick tribute band. The worst part of hell week was when the Tri-Delt pledges had to kiss him.

Dad's nads
 

This is like some sick opening scene from "8mm".

Look at hott on Benny's right...her "am I doing this right?" stare gives me chills, death is nigh.

This is staged indeed, for a snuff film.

Kill them, Benny, kill them all
 

Is it me or does Benny have a glint of Hannibal Lechter in his repugnant eyes and face.
 

I don't think Benny really got that mall kiosk job. He runs a military surplus store/pawn shop across the street from a club and he saw the douchewrecks night after night as he was locking up to go home. He decided it was his time to shine. Really, though, someone should tell him that the kissy-face isn't supposed to look like the old-man-who-just-pooped-his-pants face.
 

Benny's gay lover James is taking the picture. College girls love gay guys that buy all the booze.
 

two words - COKE . . . . DEALER
 

Good call BCS - I shit you not, (whatever the fuck that means) the first thought in my mind was 'Chris Hansen'!!
Is this pic enough to get the baldouche on any registered sex offender lists????

Scrote Von Douchemarck
 

all of these girls may be toung dumb and full of cum but it isn't benny's not yet...benny is the arranger gotta get out jail go to benny gotta get a lawyer got to benny looking for a quantitly of pills or whatever outside your normal supply go to benny...simply put he is a douche resource....so they guys who know go to him, those unpictured souls of discretion talked their girlfirends and their friends etc into posing...what the hotts didn't realize what the douches didn't realize is that by bringing them to benny he picks the ones who can get hooked on and perform services and what not toget products out side their boyfriends sphere of douche...
its laughably small time in one sense, but it happens all the time
 

I think y'all have Benny all wrong. Look at him - he's almost as homely as I am. He has NO taste in clothing, and the only thing that's missing is him flashing a sideways peace sign. BUT: he's the center of attention of 4 hotts. So, either this is staged specifically for HCwDB, or he's filthy rich and slumming it. DB1 needs to be careful - as word about this site gets around, more and more people will set up douchetastic photos, which, while amusing, don't have the innate fuck-headedness of a Real HCwDB find.

I mean: we have standards, ya know...
 

Do you think it burns Benny that his twin brother Simon Pegg has gone on to be a film star of some repute while he's stuck selling grams to the Squeaky Fromme Jr. High glee club?

No, I don't think so either.
 

I'm shocked that the otherwise keenly observant commentators seemed to have failed to notice Silky the Pimp's farmer tan rising from the depths of a chest more hairless than my chihuahua's inner thigh. And less than half as sexy.

This mere fact lends me to wonder if Silky really spends his days hawking the new Sidekick in and avoiding eye contact with self-confident women, or if he has a slightly less-glamorous post, perhaps a newspaper route so mom doesn't kick him out of the basement (excuse me, his "apartment downstairs"), even though he has kicked about 10 holes in the wood paneling when his team gets a low score on WOW and he has a temper tantrum.
 

"Benny and the Hotts" - I'm sure ol' Reginald Dwight knows his special friend here wasn't making any moves on these young ladies, even though he wonders if Saturday Night's All Right for Douching.

They just want his money or the free drinks it buys. But in what restaurants may one find the Ubiquitous Red Cup? I need to avoid those places.
 

Crushed. This guy has crushed my spirit. I got nothing.

Dude.
 

This picture reminds me of the time I looked out from the walls of Minas Tirith at the hosts of Mordor and realized that all was lost, and that death was iminent.

But then we won and I stuck my wand in Pippen. Those hobbits are good lays if you can bag one.
 

i love that the bad stagged photo in front of a mirror reveals to the world that benny didnt choose that hair cut...genetics did. give it up ben-ster

Mickey O'Douche
 

Hmm, I dunno, I get the gay vibe all the way with this one. And, judging by the necklace I'd say this is a batchlorette party for him.
 

In the reflection it appears poor Benny is balding....
 

Pfah never told us he had a douchy brother...
 

I agree with Ashfish, theose are FAG HAGS all the way

I wish I was queer, so I could get chicks...
 

its Moby, possibly a little cooler though
 

"BREAKIN' THE LAW; BREAKIN THE LAW!"

I didn't know the lead singer for Judas Priest was still alive...
 

Dude, those chicks aren't interested in you at all. No, really. They aren't.


Also, did anyone else notice his rear "hairline", as seen in the mirror, forms some type of douche Holy Grail?
 

interesting factoid: he has a mark of the douche on the front and the back of his shiny head.

how can this be?!
he is: the lord of the douche.
 

I thought Moby was queer??? oh wait look at his outfit....he still is. *phew* had me worried for a second.
 

I'm pretty sure that's the former CEO of Powerset...