Wednesday, July 23, 2008

 

Chia II


Tai-Chia responds in the comments thread:

----
this is him speaking its clearly ur a loser who put me ont his site but im proud bc use are all haters and cannot get as many grls as meim honored that u wanna be like me thanks so much for goign out of your way to do thi thanks alot no wu realize i get hot girls and you dont
----

And here I used to think those spam emails with the randomly generated text accompanying them were written by computer.

Comments:
She is yummy. I would like to be her giant turquoise pendant.

He is (still) a sour-pussed douche. What can I say? Meim a hatuh i ges coz i like da hot girlz and use punxation insted of run-on sentencez that goz on fer dayz, yo.
 
first reaction after seeing the pic? "www.russianbrides.com"
 
Years of tanning have left his fingers stiff and rigid, and thus impaired his ability to write coherant sentences with proper grammar, spelling and yes, even spacing words apart.

I'm not jealous of a piece of crap like you, Chia. You look like the offspring of a carrot and a gorilla. No one wants to be like you, the only purpose you serve is to be mocked for putting so much effort into being the speckling specimen of douchedom that you are.

Just because you can sell your bullshit to impressionable high schoolers outside the movie theater doesn't mean you get hot girls. It means you're a pervert.

Dehydrate yourself in a tanning bed and fry your brain too. That way I won't have to read or see any more of your nonsense.
 
Can we change this douche's name to 'The Epitome'? Because that is what he is.
The epitome of this site. A vapid, clueless douchebag.
Yet somehow (roofies?) has a hot girl within spitting distance of him.
 
Somewhere, the superintendent of Scottsdale Unified High School Districts is kvelling with pride...
 
His mastery of the English language is mind-boggling.
 
and if he ever gets a flat on his porsche, he can use her spare tire as a replacement.

maybe his keyboard doesn't have punctuation keys? or spell check. or a third grade education.

(note- chick in Chia pic #1 is apparently married, and so I doubt he "gitz" girls like that)
 
Under everything; his orange skin, his underdeveloped muscle, straight down to the marrow of his skinny bones, Mikey knew he shouldn’t touch Ingrid in such a way. But he couldn’t quite shake the question he’s been asking himself ever since his encounter with the priest a few months back… “Maybe she’ll finally be the one who changes my mind about boys.”
 
In a few years, he can be on the page: 'men who look like old lesbians' Hell, he could be there now, not that he's old, he's not, he just looks like a lesbian
With a long, straight stick up his ass. Dude, you are, against all odds, with a hot chick who seems to be into you. As mysterious as this is , should you not be, um, smiling?
Asshole!, get over yourself
 
I see his future and it looks like Tony and Pierre from Tuesday's "Caption This Pic".
 
See, Chia, first of all I know how to button my shirt. That's a very important skill you might want to figure out how to do later on.

Did you learn language from Jar Jar Binks and Edward James Olmos in Bladerunner? The Cityspeak is coming through loud and clear.
 
This guy sucks so bad. He deserves to be in the hall of shame, and mocked for all of eternity.

He is a disgrace to human kind. I hope Xenu spits boiling Axe and wood screws into Chia's face.
 
As far as I can see dude is batting .500
The chick in this pic is pretty cute and kinda naughty looking. The chick in the original pic isn't hot at all.

Chia up that receding hairline, put the booze down and step your game up clown.

Oh yeah, and learn how spell....tard.
 
Man, that hurt my fuckin' head. At least I can sleep well in knowing that sooner or later technology will accelerate out of the reach of this butthurt douche
 
It appears his shift, comma, period, spacebar, and enter keys are all broken on his computer - too bad.

His underbite is reminscent of bill bob thornton in slingblade.
 
Dear Tai-Chia,

I hope this letter finds you doing well. I know you didn't ask for it, but I feel the need to give you some advice.

Now, I have no idea how old you are, but I'll go ahead and assume you are around 19. Which honestly, explains the tone of your post. I remember being 19 and thinking how stupid older people were. And then we go ahead and rip you a new asshole regarding your style and pimpin' ways with all of your hot girls. You deserve to be pissed off. You really do.

But know this: We're right. You'll look back on these pictures years from now and think "What in the fuck was a doing?" You'll be embarrassed, and feel remorse for the decisions you are currently making.

If you were smart, you'd change for the better. But you're not. You're 19 and think no one rocks harder than you.

So best of luck son. Remember to wear a condom and never drive drunk. I wish you the best, but keep in mind that if you don't change your attitude some, the chances are pretty good that you'll be taking my order at White Castle 8 years from now.

Godspeed Tai-Chia,
pfah
 
This post has been removed by the author.
 
Were it not for the photo evidence, I would remain unconvinced that Chia had opposable thumbs.

But because both photos so far only show him in a seated position, I'm standing firm in my belief that he's a quadraped.

An orange, greasy-haired quadraped.

From Staten.

And she's his far more highly-evolved cousin. She is lovely.
 
this guy looks like what would happen if ben affleck's mom was fucked with the ugly stick and she gave birth in a wind tunnel. cool hair bro, the frosted tips aren't generic, greasy, corny, played out, or goofy looking at all. i thought guys tried to hide grey hair, this asshat is trying to look that. as for the girl who fucked him... one question? does the curtain match the carpet? did his blow out and gel his frosty pubes?
 
@ pfah...better go ahead and place that WC order now.
Hey, Chia, I'd like six sliders. Well, seven counting the one beside you.
 
I love when scrotes try and justify themselves and "stick it" to the hecklers by making themselves look even dumber.

The worst part is, after submitting this letter, he feels really good about himself.
 
He needs a writing lesson from HJBBAD. Damn, his grammar and spelling would actually improve. Not sure if HJBBAD will have time for such tutoring, given his busy schedule of BB&D'ing. And making millions.
 
@country o.g.... good point. i am getting rather hungry.
 
Miss Jane Hathaway bag
 
"this guy looks like what would happen if ben affleck's mom was fucked with the ugly stick and she gave birth in a wind tunnel."


that launched coffee all over my monitor.

well-done. [applause]
 
Methinks Chia is about 16... that said can we pin him with the virtues of douche or is he simply a dork?
 
use isw elcome. does use no tehd ifference btween ur car anda porcupine? Teh porcupyne hasd teh pricks on teh outside.
 
I think my head just exploded....
 
@ragnar.....i heard that joke told before, but not with the gas and wincing that accompanied reading your version.
 
this kid is sucha fucking loser and is sitting next to me to show me the comments that people left about him.. he is honestly staten islands number one loser especially because he thinks hes hot.
 
@pfah

One minor correction to your missive: He won't be working at WC--he'll be the guy begging outside of the WC.

Mmmm...Crave Case.
 
After reading pfah's letter @9:53, I've discovered the problem. It's the hotts. We enable them. We encourage their behavior by questioning their reasons. If ignored them, they wouldn't be with the bags. They would realize their bleethy ways. What's scary is that I love this site. It is battling for the noblest cause: taking down the douche. Now, I fear, it is encouraging the douche. The douche would not douche if it weren't for the hott. The douche does not douche just to douche. They douche BECAUSE the hott wants them to douche. Rescue of the hott may not be the answer...
 
He appears melancholy in this pic because he pincushioned his hair and read for the part of "Wilson" in Castaway, but failed.
 
this is janine aka mikes secret admire and im in love with him hes the hottest kid on staten island i was joking with these last comments dunt be madd ppl bc hes with me and not you and no im no tthe girl in the picture i am in love with him hes staten islands local celebrity aka the hottest kid on staten island now be quiet all u hataaassss
 
evidently, no one in Staten Island has a decent command of the English language.

realistically though, it's probably Mike himself typing as if he's a girl to try and give himself more street cred.

no worries Mike. we all know you rule the island.



oh hey, your Dad called and would like his shirt back.
 
It wuz teh best of timez, it wuz the wurst of timezzzzzz....
 
Mikey's mom mistakenly called me just now while trying to reach Pfa.

She wants her panties back.
 
mike?

there's something you should know.






i am your Father.
 
This hott, she is delectable. Which makes me want to punch Chia in the head even more than I did before.

But I'd be afraid to get orange on me.
 
Also, db1, I happen to believe Chia is HOS material all the way. Give the people what they want!
 
@janine --



There is help.


Call 1-800-AXE-KILLS

or visit www.stopfuckingthatdouche.com

Someone is waiting to help you change your life and leave the hell you're in.

Please, make that move now.
 
His ramblin' textatribe sounds eerily similar to the taunting letters from the Zodiac Killer.
 
Sadly, Anonymous @ 10:25 couldn't possibly be The Legend himself because the grammar, spelling, et al in that post is far superior to his original postings. *shudder*

My brain hurts. Why, Chia? Why? Was there a turning point in your sad little life where you thought to yourself "Mikey, smart people are fools. It's cool to be dumb"? Sorry, you probably couldn't read that. I meant "miky smrt ppl r fuls its kool 2 b dum". I'm sad for you, my little Chia Pet, and wish I could help. Not sad enough to, you know, actually touch you or anything. Just sad enough to pity your poo smell.
 
pulci you got abused in farrell. you were popular for all the wrong reasons. when people were laughing they were laughing at you. you were so pathetic that you made up stories how you made out with girls when you clearly didnt. now you're a promoter for clubs and out of high school but you're still the loser you always were. even if you do get girls now you're still a douchebag.
 
Further proof that any ol douche,can pick up chicks in a strip club.Mikey,she likes you not for who you are or how small your dick is.She likes you for the money.A lesson you have not learned in life quite yet.
 
This is amazing.

I believe that we could model Chia's "blowout" using the latest in CAD and analysis software and use it as a protective coating for the Space Shuttle!

I'm on the phone with NASA as I type...
 
The movies they went to see:

"A Midsummer Night's Cream"
"Willy Wanker and the Fudgepacking Factory"
"Swallow Hal"
"Shaving Ryan's Privates"
"Rear and Pleasant Danger"
"Mighty Joe Hung"
"Meat Joe Black"
"Lord of the Cock Rings"
"E-3: The Extra Testicle"
"Edward Penishands"

With all that movie watching, how did he find the time to go tanning?
 
"Lord of the Cock Rings"

Darksock, didn't you direct that one?
 
@pfah
dude, you keep eatin' at the Castle, and, in 8 more years you might not be around to eat at all
Bleccchh!, the only Burger I know that comes out smellin' the same as it went in, and, not helpful for the hangover next day
(shivers running down my spine)
 
I'm ashamed to say it, I feel I should announce that I was born and raised in Staten Island. I got out. Thank god, I got out. It is possible to be from there and still get an education and use the English language correctly. Extremely rare, but possible.

That said, I feel that the immutable stench may be lurking within me, and sooner or later I will revert to an Island bleeth. In fact, I feel the rising urge to bleach my hair and get nail extensions. I may not have much time left....
 
that guy is a huge douchebag
 
Enjoy the blowout Chia.

It's heading for the hills and never coming back.
 
ANON 9:15

"His mastery of the English language is mind-boggling."

NO MY FRIEND. Its "MIND BOTTLING"
 
Which came first, the 'club promoter', or the douche?
Are they interchangeable?

I stole that bit from Seinfield. It's gold, I tellya.
 
"though he would remain as morality teacher".......howl my ass off!!!!
 
Whoa. Somewhere HJBB&D is feeling a disturbance in the force...as if millions of synapses tried to fire, and were silenced forever.

@ Pfah:

I'm flattered, but no; I actually directed "Hairy Squatter and the Chamber of Secretions".
 
If it's Douchebag Poetry day today then here's my submission:

I am gaseous
In my asseous; like Clay
That is Cassius.
 
he should have been from 'statin' island...as in acne-statin.....
 
Let me put it this way: No matter how hard your so-called "homey" Pete tried to convince you, trying to look like a cross between Sonic the Hedgehog and the rubber poop monster from Dogma isn't a good strategy. In the long run, the pity handjob you might get out of it won't have been worth it.
 
So what, the kid let his coach touch him. He probably said, "kid you'll be in some European Basketball League somewhere if you let me..." Because young Michael is toiling in some Juco b-ball squad in Jersey he came with it.
 
"this is him speaking"-"use are all haters"

Um, the Zodiac killer meets TuPac? Guess what dude....startling revelation....YOU ARE NOT BLACK! Um, yer kinda orangy. And the bling/wifebeater/open collar shirt with the one button buttoned does not make you an OG Gangsta. Dear God make it stop! The entire young generation thinks they're OG's. Thanks MTV you suck.

Cutie with the turquiose brooch, I know this is your cousin and you feel bad for him but it's ok. Just sneakily erase all of the Rap/Hip Hop from his Ipod and all may return to normal soon.

I blame the Rap.
 
"no wu realize i get hot girls and you dont"

ya mean like the one in the first pix that's standing outside the bathroom wearing an engagement ring?

i'm sure you rocked her world, you mentally handicapped shitstain.
 
Ya damn kids and your music
 
this guy sucks so bad, every one hates you bro go die please
 
Cheezeeporn is dead, long live Colonel Steve Zodiac. Will return with mirth and amusement after my hand heals up.

Oh, and ChiaDouche here - is pure scrote. He has all the charm of the Arthur Kill combined with all the intellect god granted a fencepost. A really dense fencepost. Like a Black Locust felled by an Axe wielding douche.
 
welcome to the fold, Steve Zodiac!
 
use are all haters...

Mikey, apparently you strayed to close to the train tracks and after being struck by a diesel engine, it spun you widely out of control into a puddle of chemical waste that makes Love Canal look like an Olympic swimming pool.

If I were to send you a telegram it would read:

Dear Scrote: (stop)

I feel sorry for the high school hotts you thrust yourself upon. (stop)

Please, please, please. (stop)
 
HAHA YE STHS IS MIKE PULCI SPEAKING YES USE ARE ALL FUKING HATERS AND LOOSERS ALL U GUYS THAT TALK SHYT AOUT ME U CUD HAVE FUN LL U WANT I MAKE MORE MONEY THAN NAY OF USE GET MORE GIRLS THAN ANY OF USE WILL IN UR LIFE....YOSE THAT LEFT FARRELL TTHAT DIDNT LIEK ME I DUNT CARE UR ALL LOSERS BC USE HAVE NO FRNDS INTO COLLEGE AND I HAVE MILLINS NOW IM GLAD FARRELL WAS AN EXPERINCE AND NOW I MOVED ON BETTER THAN ANY KID IN FARRELL I LOVE MY LIFEE......HAHA USE ALL SUCK AND HAE FUN BC HALF THE KIDS THAT AUSED ME ARE ON M DICK NOW BC THERE LOOSER AND GET NOO GIRLS HAHA PEAE OUT HATASSS
 
MIKEYPULC is his screenname
MIKE PULCI WAS BY FAR THE BIGGEST LOSER IN FARREL. SUDDENLY TOWARDS THE END OF HIGHSCHOOL HE DISCOVERED THE GUIDO HAIR THAT WAS A DEAD STYLE. NOW HE THINKS HE GETS GIRLS WHEN HE PROMOTES FOR CLUBS. GETTIN GIRLS IS ONE THING, TAKING PICTURE WITH A RANDOM GIRL IS ANOTHER. MIKEY PULCI DO US ALL A FAVOR AND BE YOURSELF. YOUR A SICK LOSER BRO. U WERE SUCH A FAGGY LOSER IN FARRELL AND NOW YOU THINK ITS COOL? PATHETIC!. THIS SITE WAS SENT TO ME ON FACEBOOK. YOUR REP IS DONE BRO HAHAHA THIS SITE IS TOO FUNNY..


AS A STUDENT WITH MIKE PULCI AT FARRELL MIKE WAS THE BIGEST HERB U WILL EVER MEET.

YOU CAN FIND HIM WORKING AT TRENDS IN STATEN ISLAND MALL! GO IN TO GET A LAUGH AND ABUSE HIM!
 
FAG KID
 
Wowsers there's some keyboard problems in New Jersey. Missing punctuation keys, crazy sensitive spacebars and caplock set to on as a manufacturer's default.

This is all very, very mind-bottling.

I fear the future.
 
Jeez, this is getting nasty/personal and fast! I'm ashamed to live near New Jersey/New York. Is it a law that every computer in that area have a stuck CAPS LOCK key?

Why do all these idiot guidos/douchebags claim to be millionaires? I could look the way they do for about 20 dollars but that would mean compromising what little integrity I do have.
 
Wow... poor Ch-ch-ch-chia. Gaybashing is inappropriate and horrid, and I hate to see it. But, I don't think Chia is gay. Yes, he has very womanly hands, but gay guys also have fashion sense. And, fag hags don't pull away from their gay boys like the hott in the first pic is doing. Lastly, I think it is sweet that Chia helped little sis sneak into the club. 14 is definitely old enough to get your party on.
 
HAHAHAH YYA HAHA LIKE I SAID ABUSE ME ALL U WANT DO WATEVER U WANT UR PROB THE UGLIEST KID ON THSI ISLAND BRO AND A LOO0SER WHO GETS NO GIRLSS...........ASK ALL THE POEPLE I WORK WITH...I OWN HALF A CLUB USE ARE ALL LOO0SERS COOL ABOT FARRELL IM IN COLLEGE GETTING MORE GIRLS THAN ANY OF USE AND U DUNT BELEIEVE HALF OF FARRELL CALLS ME TO ASK WHERE THE PARTY AT IF THEY CUD CUM BC I WOKR THE DOOR I LET PEOPLE IN OUT AND IF URA LO0SER DUNT COME HELL YEA I WORK AT TRENDS ASK MY EMPLOYEES HOW MNAY GIRLS I GET AND THEYLL ABYUSE YOU


LETS SEE THE PERSON WHO PUT THIS PIC UP IS EVEN A BIGGER LOOSER BC THEY FEEN ME AND SECOND OF ALL THEY HAVE NO LIFE AND THIRD OF ALL I DUNT SEE ANY OTHER KID THATS COMMENTING ON HERE THATS ACTUALY WITH A GIRL

IM ON HERE TWICE AND WITH GIRLS GO CHWCK MY MSPACE AND FACEBOOK EMEAIL ALL HOT GIRLS AND ASKED OF I HU WITH THEM I PROB DID SOOO EERYONE STOP JOKING ME PEACE
 
HAHAHAH YYA HAHA LIKE I SAID ABUSE ME ALL U WANT DO WATEVER U WANT UR PROB THE UGLIEST KID ON THSI ISLAND BRO AND A LOO0SER WHO GETS NO GIRLSS...........ASK ALL THE POEPLE I WORK WITH...I OWN HALF A CLUB USE ARE ALL LOO0SERS COOL ABOT FARRELL IM IN COLLEGE GETTING MORE GIRLS THAN ANY OF USE AND U DUNT BELEIEVE HALF OF FARRELL CALLS ME TO ASK WHERE THE PARTY AT IF THEY CUD CUM BC I WOKR THE DOOR I LET PEOPLE IN OUT AND IF URA LO0SER DUNT COME HELL YEA I WORK AT TRENDS ASK MY EMPLOYEES HOW MNAY GIRLS I GET AND THEYLL ABYUSE YOU


LETS SEE THE PERSON WHO PUT THIS PIC UP IS EVEN A BIGGER LOOSER BC THEY FEEN ME AND SECOND OF ALL THEY HAVE NO LIFE AND THIRD OF ALL I DUNT SEE ANY OTHER KID THATS COMMENTING ON HERE THATS ACTUALY WITH A GIRL

IM ON HERE TWICE AND WITH GIRLS GO CHWCK MY MSPACE AND FACEBOOK EMEAIL ALL HOT GIRLS AND ASKED OF I HU WITH THEM I PROB DID SOOO EERYONE STOP JOKING ME PEACE
 
HAHAHAH YYA HAHA LIKE I SAID ABUSE ME ALL U WANT DO WATEVER U WANT UR PROB THE UGLIEST KID ON THSI ISLAND BRO AND A LOO0SER WHO GETS NO GIRLSS...........ASK ALL THE POEPLE I WORK WITH...I OWN HALF A CLUB USE ARE ALL LOO0SERS COOL ABOT FARRELL IM IN COLLEGE GETTING MORE GIRLS THAN ANY OF USE AND U DUNT BELEIEVE HALF OF FARRELL CALLS ME TO ASK WHERE THE PARTY AT IF THEY CUD CUM BC I WOKR THE DOOR I LET PEOPLE IN OUT AND IF URA LO0SER DUNT COME HELL YEA I WORK AT TRENDS ASK MY EMPLOYEES HOW MNAY GIRLS I GET AND THEYLL ABYUSE YOU


LETS SEE THE PERSON WHO PUT THIS PIC UP IS EVEN A BIGGER LOOSER BC THEY FEEN ME AND SECOND OF ALL THEY HAVE NO LIFE AND THIRD OF ALL I DUNT SEE ANY OTHER KID THATS COMMENTING ON HERE THATS ACTUALY WITH A GIRL

IM ON HERE TWICE AND WITH GIRLS GO CHWCK MY MSPACE AND FACEBOOK EMEAIL ALL HOT GIRLS AND ASKED OF I HU WITH THEM I PROB DID SOOO EERYONE STOP JOKING ME PEACE
 
whoever writes on this site is a looo0oser you are abusing him meanwhile he is with a girl and youse arent.....get a life and use are probably are all ugly and distusting
 
loser
 
Dear Chia,

How the hell could you be in college when you can't spell or type a single coherent sentence?

-CoBS
 
"He Just Bangs Bitches" is starting to look pretty good all of a sudden.
 
Hey Mikey,

American english is the language we use in the real world, not your own predictive-text language from your celly, scrote face.

On the other hand, maybe it is translating for you, since you're obviously illiterate (which means you're probably unable to read this...k...jus' a sec...

DOOD, U KNEED 2 LRN HOW 2 RITE INGLISH, BROHEIM. EVRYTYM U POST A THRED, U MAK US LAF HARDUR.
 
Oh, and...

PEACE.
 
this kid makes me want to shove nails through my eyelids while rolling over hot coals naked soaked in gasoline.
yeeeesh
My brain has imploded from trying to decipher his tard speak.
 
DIOFHROF;HEF;JHF;SLAJFHAIOHGHJHSDJJKSDFKJHDFJKHJHSDAJKBBSJHDJAHSJFKLJFLSKDFJSLKFJSLFSL.

PEACE
 
i tried to make it through this thread but pulci popped one too many CAPS in my ass

i agree with pfah's first post, except i support drunk driving, and condoms are only for sailors and queers
 
Query:

Should Tai-Chia be admitted to the Hall of Scrote?

No douche has ever responded like this before and by so doing raised his Scrote Quotient far beyond what would be possible by the pictures.

On the other hand, it would probably inflate his ego and only intensify the Jerz Guido infection raging throughout his body.

What say you, fellow 'baghunters and 'bagmockers?

P.S. I feel most sorry for the women who are defending his scrote lifestyle. Sticking with your friends, good; supporting their douchebag lifestyle, bad.
 
HoS for sure.
or a public tar and feathering, followed by my beating him to death with a pillowcase filled with 6 pound bowling balls.
 
Orangina




rhymes with:

FUCK'n DOUCHE!
 
seriously....(to the so called "females" responding for Chia) sex really is supposed to last more than 5 seconds, porn isn't just fantasy.
 
Hopefully this Russian hott will put some radioactive poison in this d-bags drink.
 
yah u tellls them chia use gots all tha ballz an hott girls an whenn u r in tha fedrel lok up for pokin tha 15 yere oldz u r gonna make sum one a reel gud wife so dont cry wen ur huzbend iz doin u in ur cell at nite cuz bubba wont like that an dont leeve lipstik printz on bubbas dik ether jus B proud to B a hott jale house bitch
 
mmm loser.
 
What can I say?

I don't have to add anything to this thread.

I'll just sit back with my scotch and watch some batshit delusional kid from Staten (and certain Hall of Scrote candidate) implode IN ALL CAPS.

Mikey, you're one barely comprehendable, misspelled joke that writes itself.

Carry on, then.
 
Pfah -

how do I make my picture appear? I got a gmail acct and even a blogger point to upload my image, but it doesn't show up. Warum? Wudd-I-do-wrongrong?
 
OH - nemmind -there it is.
 
But... how do we know that Tai-Chia/Mikey boy is really who he purports to be here? What if the person writing the text as "him" is actually one of the haters from the Island? Or one of his clones from the movie of the same name?

I want proof that this respondent is indeed Tai-Chia. Without his sweet writing skills, I'm just not sure that he is HoS worthy - thus the call for proof. As we say in the auditing biz, "You can't tick mark lips."
 
Dear grammatically impaired douchewank,

Iv'e been following this post for some time now, including the first picture. I must say that every time I try to read your comments, my brain begins to hemorrhage. Needless to say, blogging has become quite expensive especially now that you seem to pound your chest (not too hard or you may bruise a rib) more and more often. I am forced now to offer an ultimatum: either you contiue to slither among civilized society, which would result in my death by a massive aneurysm; or you can move back in with your mom, who may not have loved you enough, and cut yourself off from the rest of the world. Otherwise we may have to continue this tiresome dance until one of us dies a bloody death from reading slovenly, incoherent, and outright hilarious dribble; or one of us finally comes to terms with fact that the apex of their existence was reached when they finally discovered the proper function of a penis during their highschool prom, only to have the experience soured by a well trained and honed three second response trigger. Yours, by the by, is the latter (that means the second one). In short, you are an extreme douchebag and show great potential for even more mockery and finger pointing. And while I try hard to believe that you remain human, you certainly try my convictions. A wiser man pointed out that you are still young and may by turned from the path you have taken, it just may be so, but today you are indeed a HUGE (you see the proper use of capital letters here) scrote.

Sincerely concerned,

Anonymous
 
This whole discussion makes me the saddest I've ever been on this site. It's not the bad grammar, hellacious spelling, or the complete lack of sentence structure, it's how personal this has gotten. Remember friends, this is all in fun, we're here to let off some steam and make fun of folks who act like idiots, that's it. It's always a little weird knowing information on someone in a pic, I remember learning who Xenu and Purg Hottie were, and it ruined it.

So can we try to be civil and keep the whole personal attacks out of these? Also, this girl is quite striking, and Pfah, well said sir.
 
@ douche quixote

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I see a gaggle of reporters surrounding Rodney King, and his immortal words still ring in my ears as if it were just happening...

"Can't all Bleeths just throat my dong?" er...can't we all just get along.

Sorry...couldn't help it.
 
Between the original message from Chia and the anon post at 3:19, I just had flashbacks to Flyteeth.

Tools like Chia make my brain hurt.
 
Hahahaha, I love that he thought defending himself was a good idea, just proved further he was a scabby douche. Maybe you should use the money you get from your half a club, I dont know try mugging someone with it, can you use tools yet, and learn how to speak properly.
 
You all remember the end of Raiders of The Lost Ark, when their faces melted?

Thats how I feel after reading the Anonymous throw down battle.
 
Tai Chia gets a 10/10 on spelling and grammer. give his teacher a golden star.
 
douche quixote pleads for peace.

I understand the sentiment. However, what we are seeing is something even MORE depressing: the arrival of a new class in petroleum society. I would argue that it is a transitory class - something like the American Industrial Middle Class of the 1950s and 60s, which arrived in 1946 and vanished in the early 1970s, reeling from the first oil shock and nascent globalism with the exportation of american industrial demands to the third world.

This new class, which I have no name for, yet, is largely illiterate and is fascinated by flashy things of the moment, whether it is TV, computer games, or hot chicks with fine boobies. Due to the gutting of American Education at the behest of "Texpayers" (a group that replaced citizens, starting in 1978 with California's prop 13), expecting these new generations to have anything resembling culture or decorum is absurd. Their parents, at this point either aging hippies or punks or new wave disco ducks, rejected the foundationalist approach to culture under the banner of postmodernism, pluralism, and feminism (the last to were admirable goals, but postmodernism was bullshit from the gitgo) and with it went any hope of expecting cultural basics to be taught - whether it be the simple joys of spelling and proper grammar to the fineries how to use cutlery and chew with your mouth shut.

With the art programs blown to bits and ship wrecked on the remnants of expressionism (abstract or otherwise) and its blinkered notions of alla prima painting, and then buried under the philosophical baggage of conceptualism, learning simple things like perspective and proportion never happened.

With music programs dismantled, but the urge to create music remaining celebrated, no one had to learn an instrument or how to read music, or even the basics of how to compose, and blathering oscenities in octameter over a drum machine and turntable became the obvious option.

Creative writing took a beating, as did other intellectual pursuits as America de-intellectualised what little it had in terms of public intelligensia, and in short order, a complete chowderhead was elected president, a perfect reflection of the cultural retardation of the Society. So, now, we have a website where dullwitted people parade themselves in nonsensical poses of testosterone poisoned idiocy, and are made fun of by a group of people who, rightfully, see that these people are scrote and deserve a dressing down.

Finally one of these illiterate members of this new uneducated class of losers pipes up to defend himself, and we all laugh at his imbecility.

Douche Quixote - it is all so much worse than you think. And to Mikey TaiChia the Douche - go read a book, will ya? The rest of us, ponder this moment.
 
all the other pics are funny ..but this kid is the man..i seen him a club once hes a funny kid and is nice to everyone. Stop judgin this kid. and stop hatin on staten island people. this site is pathetic. i love how one has a bashing site and doesn't think about the lawsuits that may follow. Bashing someone and posting their picture as the main topic of the site is illegal so just a heads up. MIKEY PULCI IS THE MAN haha
 
@steve zodiac --

Well said.

Great essay.

What about this thought? I've been thinking about it a lot lately.

Members of Generation Douche® are fully aware of the hopelessness of their situation and its compromised aspirations. They know too many people who've wound up with a series of jobs in lieu of a career. No one stays married and kids just happen. "Loyalty" and "Permanence" are foreign concepts. Out of this cynical morass, they've chose to cope by adopting identities with overcompensated self-importance and inflated self-worth. They live for the club life because it's the one place that offers some measure of what they perceive to be "value" because it offers an immediate reward for the effort. And there is no context of past or future with them; instead, like all the technology that surrounds them, there's just the knife's edge of the present waiting to be supplanted by the next and faster version.

God, I'm becoming an apologist.

Time for lunch.
 
@ Steve Zodiac

Condense, condense, condense.

However, very well-researched and zen-like in it's more exculpatory passages in the 5th and 6th chapters.

Brilliant.
 
mike cut ur hair bro..u look like a fag
 
@anon 9:28 --

*shakes head*







Never mind.
 
@oldbagnanimous 9:29am:

Yep I see a definite resemblance to KD Lang already.
 
Well, now that names have been named and placed within a geographic and educational context:

http://blog.silive.com/advanceupdate/2007/07/suspect_screamed_for_accomplic_1.html

Army of Douche-ness