Holy hell I've never heard or seen that thing.
 

Pete Doherty's uglier brother.
 

I think she is a DJ or has something to do with the music industry.

Does this mean that we now have to save Mother Earth's remaining hotties from the increasing number of male douchebags AND sexually ambiguous uberscrotes?

I can't deal with this right now, there are not enough hours in the day.

-Scrotal Recall
 

I mean sister
 

I hate humanity
 

That thing and Lindsey Lohan?

I don't know, man. It's like the black hole of douchedom. It's bizarre and twisted and weird and I just can't even give a shit.

Just. Make. It. Stop.

Please.
 

Between Moby Dick and Samantha Ronson this week is EPIC.

And by epic I mean nauseating to the point of clubbing baby seals with puppies while eating kittens and capuchin monkey kabobs.

Damn I hate those little monkeys.

-Scrotal Recall
 

Let's go back in time - you just finished watching 'Mean Girls' (come on you know you watched it) and someone tells you that in a few years this soft, boobie Lohan will be lesbian and more than likely a sex video would be 'leaked' - you'd be hard for a week. I know I would have been. Then she goes and gets all drugged out and hooks up with this beast. I now have an anti-erection.
 

I see neither hott nor douche. Just confusion.
 

db1, Thank you!

for years Ive been passing on the tidbit of biological trivia of Jamie Lee Curtis being some creation of XXY. People say, "but look at her tits...". I learned this from one of the top genetics professors in the country, and why would he lie about that?

Sweet validation!!!
 

she stands up to pee
 

I must have missed the episode where Pee Wee Herman fucked Boy George.
 

Or McLovin. It's a gray area.
 

Yes and Yes.
 

If it is a she, she is the ugliest confused she known to me. BUT if it is a he:
the stupid hat
overdone bling
sideways hand gesture
take my hottie to the fair to show her off to the rest of the carni bags
DESERVES A BEAT DOWN.
 

I too missed the episode that our astute colleague BVG points out.

Unfortunately, I have now seen proof and am ashamed.
 

*gouges out his own eyes and runs around the room into the walls, bleeding and screaming loudly.*
 

SaMANtha is apparently getting more quality 'tang (or as anonymous calls it, "punani") than I and any ten other guys are lately--if the rumor mills are to be believed.

I am not exactly sure what makes doin' her better than just doin' a really ugly skinny nerdy guy, with bad taste in fashion and a thrift store budget, and limited access to Clearasil.

Bonus "Mad at Daddy" points for getting carpetmunched by another X-chromosome carrier?

The "Artist in the Garret" appeal of an impoverished DJ? Assuming that DJ's are "artists," as we have discussed? I guess it is mainly important if the hott PERCEIVES that DJ's are artists...

The vague promise that entry into trendy clubs in Ibiza might await, if the hott can only spring for BOTH of their vacation packages??

I am just thinking out loud, here...
 

don quixscrote said...
I wish I could unsee this.

Ditto.

At least gay guys try to look attractive by, I don't know, bathing or getting some Proactiv.

If by not having your own picture on your Facebook page leads one to believe that they are ugly, then this "person" is guilty. Fugly is as fugly does.
 

Sam Ronson = shim.
 

She is a douche. Even her wikipedia picture is douchetastic:

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/61/Ronsoncropped.jpg

If she isn't gay, she should be. Nothing rongwrong about that, it's just she's putting out all the "I'm a lesbian" vibes.
 

DJ SilverSpoonSinceBirth shags hollywood trainwrecks, people give a shit. FILM AT 11

The over/under on overdose/murder/suicide is 18 months. Place your bets.
 

She is Lindsay Lohan's girlfriend and she def qualifies for douchibaggery.
 

She is Lindsay Lohan's girlfriend and she def qualifies for douchibaggery.
 

vomit.
 

: )
 

Samantha Ronson is a "Mystery."

Isn't that Nicole Richie with, ummmmm, it?
 

She's the step daughter of Foreignor's Mick Jones

http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/story?id=5475432&page=1

http://www.smh.com.au/news/people/lindsay-lohans-tabloid-outing/2008/07/26/1217097102247.html
 

I'd Shit in his hat.
 

And her brother is Mark Ronson who is actually a famous (and good) music producer.
 

Her brother has produced Amy Winehouse, Kaiser Chiefs, Candie Payne, and a lot of other good bands. Hey, props to Sammy for scoring Lindsay.

She should still be in next week's weekly, though. The bling, the hand sings, the bad t-shirt all qualify.
 

She's the step daughter of her uncle's brother, twice removed from her mother's half sister's great grandmother. Very Talented!



Fuck, she's got nothing on me.

I'm the great great great wicked great grandson of the semi retarded dock hand who almost blew up the Mayflower the night before she set sail for America.

Do a search on google.

"almost blew up the Mayflower"

Nothing come up does it?

Because you're not on the "Need To Know" list.
 

I almost gave her/him/it a nottadouche pass were it not for the growth hanging off her left shoulder. Um, not to mention the bling, hand gestures, and 1980s reject wardrobe.

Here's to you, hermaphrodite bag...may your hemorrhoids be painful all up and down your 'taint, neither here nor there a penis or vagina there ain't.
 

What the hell is that thing? It kind of bears a resemblance to a Copperhead snake.
 

don't know who she it, but the welding shield sunglasses indicate an uncurable bleeth cancer.

him? (can I use the male gender in this situation?) my 9 pound cairn terrier could kick his ass!
 

I've never heard of her, and can only reasonably assume she's the one on the left?!?!?

I'm too lazy and disinterested to look her up. And too disturbed by the 2 photos below this one. Damn, that limerick down there might just be worse than the Bra!!/Haiku/package one (see the link "Bro!!" in HoS).
 

she's just clinging to the O.C. version of Boy George
 

Chicks luv gay guys.
 

I thought the whole "Jamie Lee Curtis is a hermaphrodite" thing was an urban legend ...?
 

Fuck it's happy about something.
 

I believe her dingle doth dangle.
 

How much do you want to bet this thing spins douche music? And sucks at it too.

Oh wait ... I win:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7VGfBj0BHo
 

Couldn't sleep, so,I see this. Now, I'm up all night.
Hey, if Jamie Lee is a hermie, I'd give it a reacharound, maybe, but this?, this scares me more than Ellen and what's-her-face-Heche
What a train wreck
 

This is what I know:

Her brother is a pretty big music producer.

She's a DJ (ambulatory iPod)

She's dating Lohan.

She looks like she should be named Ducky and inhabit a world where John Hughes writes the dialogue for everyone living there.

Why I know any of this shit I don't know. Time to start using my head to tap out "kill me, kill me now" in Morse code.
 

Those two dudes look really happy together.
 

True story:

I looked at that photo, and said to myself "That Samantha chick isn't too bad, kind of cute, but what is with that dude she is with." Also having never heard of Samantha Ronson, I turned to my trusted freind Internet only to learn that - not only is she the younger sister of a fellow I've never heard of - the "dude" in the photo IS Samantha. W.T.F. Stupid Brits. Seriously?

Jamie Lee may very well be some sort of Man-Woman hybrid, but at least she never went around looking like a douched up version of Chris Crocker.
 

I see nothing but scrote. She (it) needs to fall off the radar before I barf for the 35467th time. And by barf, I mean hang myself upside down on a bridge over a busy freeway with the hopes a rig will pass by and decapitate me.
 

Regardless of what the actual gender of the specimen on the left is, I think the one thing we've all missed so far (and which is the epitome of a douche move, no matter what sex one is) is that Sammy is rocking not only hand gesture #23, the sideways peace sign, but also hand gesture #1: actually holding up bling to the camera. I will repeat that: it is actually HOLDING UP IT"S BLING TO THE CAMERA. If I wasn't positive he/she is already sterile, I would call for it's immediate castration/tubal ligation. I mean jesus-tap-dancing-christ. That's a move I think we have yet to encounter on the site.

gradbag
 

OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH, NOW I GET IT! after having no idea what anyone was talking about, i had to google "samantha ronson". she's the one on the left! that's hillarious! (and yet eerily tragic at the same time). i thought that was a member of new kids on the block looking older and trying to recapture their "glory days" by dressing the same way they did in '91 and glomming on to famous-only-for-having-talented-parents-but-otherwise-wastes-of-cells types in hollywood.

yeah, it's funnier now! she sucks!
 

Is there any relation to Mick Ronson, Bowie's old guitarist?
 

As I must often do, I had to once again turn to my brothers here in the comments thread to try and make sense of the photo. My initial confusion sprang from:

1) With the rapid and continual stage progression of Bleethdom, I had no idea the chick on the right was a Lohan;

2) The dude on the left looked like a Pete Dougherty wannabe;

Thus, I came to the conclusion that the Sam in question was the mess on the right, and was thus confused as it seemed more Bleeth than Bag.

After finally figuring it out, I Googled young Sammy and found this wonderful nugget, concerning her initial foray into the music biz:

"I got a call one night from a club that I used to hang out at and they were like 'Do you want to DJ?'" Ronson remembered. "I was like, 'No way' [but] my friends were like 'Come on, just do it.'"

Like, wow Sam...Like, yea. Like, stop talking.

Also, she's quite accomplished. Don't believe me? Well, besides regularly licking the goo from Ms. Lohan's slot, Sam has also "appeared at Jessica Simpson's Birthday Party, with Lindsey Lohan on the American Music Awards, ElleGirl Prom, Blender, Maxim, Playstation, IFC Awards, Playstation at the Superbowl, Sundance, and the VMA's in Miami".

Gee, if that's not stardom, I don't know what is. I feel so inadequate.

And to think, I really dig Foreigner. At least it's not Mick's real daughter.
 

Jamie Lee Curtis has a dong too? I still think she(?) is hot. I am so confused right now.
 

Who's the douchebag in the black hat?
 

For those with short memories, i refer you to DB1's post a month or so ago about pretentious, no-talent, trust-fund, coke-headed DJ's.

This bleethskank is Exhibit A.

I'd highlight the link here, but I'm Blogger illiterate...
 

Leave off the names and gender, examine photo, Douche+Bleeth.

Bag 'em Dano!
 

She's a "DJ". Which means... I am not a musician... can't sing or pluck and instrument... but I'll play other people's records a pretend I have talent.

She's just a little L.A. scenester... harmless. What's up with all those Z list celebrity chicks... they're all unattractive, but the tweens are all about them.

Strange.

- Douchey Smurf
 

i think she is lance bass's alter ego, he was gay but then decided he wanted to be a girl so he had his asshole altered into a vagine, now it is still gay because its bumpin C's with linsey...
-scissor mi timbers
 

oh man,HCWDB should totally start including lesbians. some of the hugest douches ever are lesbians. it's actually more annoying because they're the same ones who point out douchebaggery in dudes, then they turn around and do it.
as someone who goes that way occasionally, it seriously narrows down the pool of possibly hot dykes.
 

The pump up the volume chick is Samantha Mathis, who is actually finer than frog-hair. DEFINITELY not the same as this train wreck.
 

If this humble scrote may be so bold as to build on the giant work of the great Jean Claude Van Douche who said, "Here's to you, hermaphrodite bag..." by proposing the term:

hermaphrodouche

Who would of thought that Joey from DeGrassi Junior High would grow up to be a chick? I take that back. We all thought it.
 

She's a shit dj riding the coat tails of her brother who's a cheesy UK dj/producer.
 

What's Mr. Bean doing with Lionel Richie's daughter???

Creepy!!!
 

@ ted theodore scrotgan

waidaminnit waidaminnit waidaminnit!

Samantha Ronson is the one in the hat???

Oh.

Oh dear.

Oh dear no no no NO NO NONONONONONONONONOOOOOOOOOOOOO (valve burst!) harrrrghle gluh-farghhhh......
 

Having conversed this subject with my wife, she has concluded that she is a whole new breed - a lesboducheian.

Dear reader's I now know that horror of the future to come, I pray that lesboducheians will keep to their Hollywood hunting grounds and not spread throughout the land and by land I mean Jersey. I can not bear to imagine the fate the world of a true duche/lesboducheian scrotial crossover, where scrotal gender laws are no longer defined.

I must leave you now, for this is too much to bear upon my weakened constitution...Hark! a whistle blow of a distant 'train hangover coming with the dawn.
 

Holy shit! You finally found a lesbian douchebag! Dude! Never even thought of Sam Ronson!

Sam-Ron has gesture, bling, weird hat, but lacks kissy face and forehead smear. I vote douche. Lesbidouche.

Although (speaking from a lesbian point of view) I don't find Lindsey Lohan particularly suckle-worthy.
 

She's a skank, not so much a douche, or douchette for that matter. And Hohan is rapidly falling from hot status to mega-skank, no-talent status. She has a nice rack, that's about all.
 

ok she isn't samantha mathis from the pump up the volume movie

she is the love child butt baby of ducky and the short new kid
 

Like the many posters above I had no idea that was a chick on the left. Until google. But now that I think about it "she" bares striking resemblence to a 80lb hipster I used to buy x from.
 

shes a douche, and by the looks of it need to as well!
 

I think Samantha Ronson is the Beatrix Kiddo to Douche Lee's Pai Mei.
 

Samantha Ronson: Some EXTREMELY shitty "celebrity dj" who has not a clue what good music is, nor what good looks are. I think she's completely fucking useless, and she sucks as a "dj".

Samantha: Please kill yourself!!!
 

I'm pretty sure that's Nicole Richie with Sammy boy. And while Sammy may be a no talent douche she's a RICH no talent douche. Hohan is her kept woman.

Gotta hurl now.
 

So this is the "lovely lady" who's dating Lindsay lohan...and by "lovely lady" I mean scrotette...5 levels of hell in one picture *shivers*