AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!

why anon, why?

you had to piss off the boss, and now we all suffer!

What's next?

Xenu in a thong?
 

I wish I could say my money's on the laser beam, but I'm afraid Fish Slap is just too powerful. And by powerful, I mean douchetastic.
 

Douchebags with lasers! We are all doomed.
This is actually the less suck-cessful T-1000 terminator "Scotebag" model. Sent from the future to get on some hotts.
 

i think the slap was going for this look...
 

RUN FISHSLAP. The Predator has you in his sights.
 

oh sweet embrace of the translucent octopus, take Fish Slap to your lair and have your way...
 

Fishslap..... you disappoint me....... That chick is not Hot
 

This is about as classic as it gets.

Notice his Douchvelopment:
going away from the shaved eyebrow, and amassing full arm tatts. DD has some new tatts too, so it seems that Tatts might make a strong play for ADouchetrement of the year.

Chin strap will be a tight contender for the same prize.
 

Someone please place an IED under his TransAm
 

Unfortunate for the rest of the human race, the laser here can't get through the shiny reflectiveness of 'Slap's bling.

He is strong with the Douche.
 

Get to the Choppa!

and leave fish slap behind!

fuck him.
 

FUCK ME!
 

he's rubber and he's douche/
whatever weapons science creates/
bounces off him then smells like poo.

this will be submitted to the New Yorker for publication, and I like my chances!
 

Oh no he di'int!! He brung out Fish Slap??

Nice goin' Anon...Hope you're happy.

I'm morbidly curious how DB1 is going to top this, but I WILL tune in!

Fish has reeled in some better hotts, but I'd still think of unmentionable things I'd never actually do to her. Mostly, because I'd never get the time of day from her....

Fuck Fish Slap!
 

I'd be passing out against a wall too if I were wearing not one but two pieces of head accessory that were cutting off my circulation.
 

It looks like the Fucked Slap of the Fish is in the process of reaching douche nirvana though meditation.

He has truly reached the state of nothingness and non-perception required to combat his ignorance by attaining the true inner scrote. In fact, he can project his desensitized douche aura directly from his shoulder to a bleeth entering a club by simply chanting his mantra:

Most holy spirit of Xenu. Na is grease, Ma is axe, Si is bling, Va is tatt, and Ya is shaved chest. Many are it’s meanings. Many are it's ways. Holy most high Lord Xenu be thy name. Auuummm.

(I am afraid. Very afraid.)
 

He is closing his eyes not thinking of the ass next to him but thinking how spectacular it would be if he could have sex with himself
 

Fish slap is back, and this time...he's brought a laser with him. I didn't think it could get any worse, but he brought his A-game today...


Buffy the Scrotebag Slayer
 

She has lovely hands.






Fuck Fish Slap and Fuck Anon!
You mess with the bull, you get the horns!
DB1? I call Uncle.
 

It says something about the Gauntlet when Fish Slap isn't the biggest douche of the day.
Fuck Fish Slap
 

Thank you DB1 for revealing the here to fore unkown final work of Jean-Michel Basquiat, "Douche."
 

Once the focussed twin laser beams burn a hole through his shirt, he'll wake up and say "Muuuhnhnhh? Wuh? OW!"
 

Wow. A Dr. Who reference - the obscurity of your references often reaches poetic proportions. And by poetic, I mean cheesy sci-fi series!
 

Also, I'm glad anon lit a fire under DB1. Frankly, the only real douchebag prior to the Gauntlet was the Player, and he's pretty minor league. Even last week's winner wasn't that douchie

- which is why I DIDN'T VOTE FOR HIM. It seems the audience here is easily distracted by the Boobs. ARE YOU BETTER THAN THE DOUCHEBAGS? THEN LOOK BEYOND THE BOOBS! look at the freaks who get to fondle them! The Hotts are lovely, but the scrotes must go! And yikes -th e comments "oh the boobie oh the boobies" waa wa waa, poor little babies need the mommy booby thang, meanwhile the very people they desire are being DEFILED by the lowest of the low, the shit floating at the top of the cesspool of western civilistion - and all you can do is whimper "Boobies!" Well, good move, Ace - let me know how that works out for ya. Are the hotts important? Yes. But they arouse desire, not disgust, which dovetails with a recent post about bleeths.

Yes the bleeths must be mocked. They must be verbally slapped about. They must be ignored. Sadly, if we ignore them, they will drift to the douchebags, and breed like retarded flies, and overpopulate the world with knnuckle dragging, illiterate, dumbass JerZee, boneheaded crotchfruit!

Oh just shoot me now...
 

@ steve zodiac-




amen.
 

I can almost here the Daleks now: "Ex-ter-min-ate! Ex-ter-min-ate!"

Yes, please do, Daleks. Please do.
 

Oh, The Slap never ceases to amaze....in him, with every new photo, we're able to catch a glimpse as to what the virus is mutating to next.

He should be captured and used in medical science experiments....painful ones.
 

@Steve Zodiac

Well said, sir.
 

I like that I just won a big fu^king prize look on her face.
 

Even the bolts from Thor's hammer make no dent in the scaled armor of the FS.

I must be excused now to swat at retarded flies with my knuckles.

Oh...and FFS!
 

I can't think of a better place than a disco in Las Vegas to close your eyes, repeat your mantra, and try to achieve a quiet but resolute nirvana.
 

If this guy ever gets laid, that would be proof enough for me that there is no god.

I didn't think it was possible, but he actually seems to be getting douchier with age.

I mean, this guy transcends the natural parameters of douchosity. As Nigel from Spinal Tap would say: this douche goes to eleven.
 

I've said it before and I'll say it again:

Fuck Fish Slap.
 

No! Anything but the Slap!

DB1, why must you punish all of us because one ornery 'baghunter?

AV
 

oh - I forgot - ob: Fuck Fish Slap.
 

Fish Slap would make a great assistant for the Master. Much like the robot dog Doctor Who had, but way stupider.

AV
 

Is it just me? or does the Fish Slaps latest hot look like a slutted up Rachel Ray?
 

that's the great Satan's tongue flicking across his A #1 anal storm trooper "Pescado Palmada"

this cat continues to mine the depths of douche while pulling first rate tale...though he may not know what to do with it

nice new trashy tatts 'Slap...fuck you!
 

Nice chin'acne on the brunette...
And Fuck Fish Slap!
 

Aiy yie.

Yes, Fish Slap, I want ketchup with my fries.
 

Fuck Fish Slap!!

Where have JoeyP and Bra been ALL Summer???? huh???
 

I e-mailed DB1 personally yesterday and told him i had a dream that I met Fish Slap and that he was really sensitive and was hurt by HcWDB.

I partially feel responsible for this and am not sure if i should be proud of cry.

Army of Douche-ness
 

@Mr. Zodiac

Yes the cleavite has me. I admit it. I do not whine, I mentally caress. It is a fault, but I'm okay with that. That these folk, both douche and bleeth, have nothing better to do during the summer than Re-hab is disturbing and I am jealous, 'til I look in the mirror. Then all is right again.

But Hour Glass.........!

Oh. Never mind.
 

This post has been removed by the author.
 

@Mr. Zodiac

Yes the cleavite has me. I admit it. I do not whine, I mentally caress. It is a fault, but I'm okay with that. That these folk, both douche and bleeth, have nothing better to do during the summer than Re-hab is disturbing and I am jealous, 'til I look in the mirror. Then all is right again.

But Hour Glass.........!

Oh. Never mind.
 

NOMAD STER-I-LIZE!
 

The Daleks are no match for the Slap. He'd just keep spinning them around looking for the keg tap until they drowned in their own vomit.

Much like I'm likely to do if today's parade of atrocities continues.
 

a close eyed, double head wrapped, new tatted up, chin strapped, dalek laser resistant SLAP??

has there ever been a 2 time winner of the month? Slap could make db history if not..

And the fuckin Douchebagg community is going to have to step it the fuck up if they wanna be real contenders for the '08 Douchie awards, after what Fuck Slap just threw down...

Holeee shiit.
 

Slap on,

Slap off,

Slap on slap off...

THE SLAPPER
 

Slap on,

Slap off,

Slap on slap off...

THE SLAPPER
 

You'd better be glad you are anonymous. Thanks for making Management throw down the gauntlet. And by gauntlet I mean my lunch.
 

Sorry for the double post. However, well I'm at it, I still say Phelps is douche.
 

Those are some major heroin tracks
 

Ugghhh. Fuck Fish Slap!

These people really can't be allowed to procreate.
 

i feel your pain, zodiac. last week's winner revealed a serious flaw in recent bagelection reasoning. As i said before, the hott will get you in the door, but only true douchestrength will carry you to victory. At least that's the way it should be
 

going through the Fish Slap (fuck him) archive, one can chronicle his further descent into the douchal abyss....

... now he resembles an Arabian horse breeder.... he's the guy who fluffs the ponys!
 

Everytime I see the Slap, I'm amazed all over again at the vast amount of rage and despair that rise within me, giving me a tightness in the chest and bringing me nearly to tears I can scarcely explain.

Poor, wasted Bleeth. She's a mighty fine specimen, too. Damn shame she's been contaminated with Fish Slap's poisonous man venom. Boo. My soul weeps.
 

FFS
 

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-haberdouchery
 

I wouldn't fuck fish slap with Shemp's dick.

Wouldn't fuck the fat bitch next to him either.
 

How is it possible no one has mentioned this unbelievable choad's nose bling? THE MAN HAS A NOSE STUD. That's a whole new plane of douchitude.
 

Good thing she has long gerbil plucking fingers.
 

If Calvin Klein designed and clothed douchebags, this is what it would look like.
 

What is Fish Slap thinking....shhh... let's listen ing...

"ohh, this chick is not so hot. Man, I've spent half my paycheck on supplements for the past 6 months, I better f'ing get the DOY 2008... this bitch is leaning on me, and my ABS are missing a photo op...SHIT...and all the protein powder has caked up in my lower intestine... pretty sure I'll need to take a long stiff dump on Sunday..."

Clearly, he's got issues, despondent. So he's bandaged his head.

--VS
 

Fish Slap has wet dreams.

Fish Slap meditates on Hott, and medicates with pot.

Fish Slap plays with other fishes, and swims in bitches.
 

@haberdouchery:

FFE?

;)
 

I can honestly and gladly say that I have never seen a bigger douche in my life, I am appauled at Fish Slap. He should take that bandana off from under his beret, blind fold himself with it and play in some traffic
 

Fresh from his frontal lobotomy, fish slap liked the way his dressing looked and it was handy to wipe drool. He looks like half pirate half gay-french dude...