Thursday, November 20, 2008
The 2008 Douchies: The Nominees Are...
The 2008 Douchies are coming. December 8th.
Still a couple of weeks away. But here's where I need your help.
The Douchies work over a two week period. Each day a different category is voted on, while the Monthly finalists are broken up into sub-finals groups of three each. The three sub-group winners go on to the final vote, HCwDB of the Year.
But the other categories still need nominees. That's where you come in.
Help me narrow down the field and sort out the hott-wheat from the douche-chaff. Here's the current list of categories in which nominees are still open:
Hottest Hott
Best Golden Globes
Smells Like Poo
Most Expensive First Date Hott
Douchiest Hair
Douchiest Facial Expression
Most Annoying 'Bagling
The Ricky (aka "Douchiest Everybag")
Greatest Crisis of Modernity
Hottest Girl-Next-Door Hott
Most Innovative New 'Bag Maneuver
Most Likely to be Part of the Permanent Collection of the Guggenheim in 2023
Clearest Proof of Natural Selection
Best 'Bag Hunter of the Year (Comments Threads)
Best 'Bag Huntress of the Year (Comments Threads)
Douchiest TV Show of the Year
Douchiest HCwDB Celebrity Couple of the Year
Help me out. Which pics deserve recognition? And by recognition, I mean spew.
List your nominees in the comments threads. Or if you need more time, return to this thread when you have time to sort through.
I'll be taking suggestions right up until we start. And what a glorious, half-drunk Awards Show this will be.
# posted by Douchebag1 @ 7:01 AM 
Comments:
there is no way this can be completed while i'm in my office. this is going to need a friday night and a bottle of captain.
Douchiest TV Show. Diners Drive-Ins and Dives. A show about food hosted by th eking of TV douches Guy Fieri. Bleached Hair, White sunglasses always worn on back of head, Sweat band 1/3 of way up arm, Quotes such as "money" when describing some grandmothers macaroni and cheese recipe.
# posted by 
: 7:08 AM
: 7:08 AM
which also answers the next category, douchiest celebrity couple. heidi and spencer. hands fucking down.
Douchiest HCwDB Celebrity Couple of the Year should certainly go to Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag. mainly because they symbolize everything i despise.
well, except Heidi's big fake boobies. those can stay.
well, except Heidi's big fake boobies. those can stay.
hottest hott -- 1/28/08, the Patriots girl in "The Dreadlocks" photo.
hottest girl-next-door hott -- 2/27/08, the blonde in "Stonebag"
hottest girl-next-door hott -- 2/27/08, the blonde in "Stonebag"
bag huntress nominees are of course ashfish, amanda, medusa, hypersexual girl, a few others. ashfish has been around a long long time, so long time regulars might give her the nod. medusa is into bondage and leather and rips up the comment threads...amanda is obviously the model and the up and coming l.a. starlet, but her defense of douchebags and her offer of a date with donkey douche was quite disturbing. then again, hypersexual girl, UM. Uh....
tough call.
tough call.
"Douchiest HCwDB Celebrity Couple of the Year"
Who is that couple that are in the MTV reality show the Hills? (I think its called the Hills)
I breifly saw something on TV about them and thought what a fucking putz. the girl is hot as shit and he is her makeup artist, professional movie director, light and boom coordinator, dress designer, writer, producer, manager, boyfriend, stunt double, auto mechanic, chef, lobbyist, etc.....Jack of all trades master of being a douchtwat
Who is that couple that are in the MTV reality show the Hills? (I think its called the Hills)
I breifly saw something on TV about them and thought what a fucking putz. the girl is hot as shit and he is her makeup artist, professional movie director, light and boom coordinator, dress designer, writer, producer, manager, boyfriend, stunt double, auto mechanic, chef, lobbyist, etc.....Jack of all trades master of being a douchtwat
# posted by : 7:35 AM
: 7:35 AM
that's pretty funny within 5 minutes of this post there have already been 3 mentions of heidi and spencer from the hills. gee, wonder who's gonna win?
Best 'Bag Hunter of the Year (Comments Threads).....
Gotta be DarkSock for this genius:
[She is clearly cock blocking.
# posted by Blogger DarkSock : 6:35 AM]
The fact that I remember that comment from 5 months ago is testimony to DarkSock's cleverness.
And yes, I'll wipe his DNA off my lips now.
Gotta be DarkSock for this genius:
[She is clearly cock blocking.
# posted by Blogger DarkSock : 6:35 AM]
The fact that I remember that comment from 5 months ago is testimony to DarkSock's cleverness.
And yes, I'll wipe his DNA off my lips now.
@ BCS: "guggenheim obviously should go to still life with coors light." Absolutely, in a walk.
Celeb Couple: John McCain & Sarah Palin
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: Hate Assbury
Clearest Proof of Natural Selection: Droopy McScrote
Celeb Couple: John McCain & Sarah Palin
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: Hate Assbury
Clearest Proof of Natural Selection: Droopy McScrote
# posted by : 7:43 AM
: 7:43 AM
A systematic review of the past year would take a level of focus and time I rarely possess. So like any good American facing an important election, I will vote randomly and haphazardly.
Douchiest TV show: The Hills is a strong cotender, but we should not neglect Paris Hilton: My New BFF.
I think all of our huntresses should be nominated. And they should submit tasteful nudes for judging. Except for Medusa. She can post something totally filthy. And I'll enjoy it.
Douchiest TV show: The Hills is a strong cotender, but we should not neglect Paris Hilton: My New BFF.
I think all of our huntresses should be nominated. And they should submit tasteful nudes for judging. Except for Medusa. She can post something totally filthy. And I'll enjoy it.
I would like to add an award:
"most ticklish douch"
And while I'm at it, I'll just give the award to The Gator.
"most ticklish douch"
And while I'm at it, I'll just give the award to The Gator.
# posted by : 7:46 AM
: 7:46 AM
Celebridouche couple: Criss Angel and Holly Madison.
Most Annoying Bagling: HJBBAD
Most Innovative New Bag Manuever: The belt buckle side tilt
Most Annoying Bagling: HJBBAD
Most Innovative New Bag Manuever: The belt buckle side tilt
Smells Like Poo: Small Package
Best Golden Globes: Boobie Ephiphany or Unnecessary Point
Hottest Girl Next Door Hott: Surfer Kelly
Huntress: Amanda (and I may have a lead on a picture of her if I can find a full episode of a certain TV show)
Hottest Hott: Polka-dot bikini from this week.
Best Golden Globes: Boobie Ephiphany or Unnecessary Point
Hottest Girl Next Door Hott: Surfer Kelly
Huntress: Amanda (and I may have a lead on a picture of her if I can find a full episode of a certain TV show)
Hottest Hott: Polka-dot bikini from this week.
# posted by : 7:48 AM
: 7:48 AM
Quato's model hott for hottest hott. Yummy.
And can I vote for a threesome for Celebri-douche? Bono-bag and his underage gal pals.
And can I vote for a threesome for Celebri-douche? Bono-bag and his underage gal pals.
@bcs
A half dead, rotting-in-the-sun wildebeest takes your breath away.
------------------------------
A fly taking a shit takes your breath away.
--------------------------------
Maggots on raw meat takes your breath away.
--------------------------------
darksock's mom eating a pastrami sandwich takes your breath away.
A half dead, rotting-in-the-sun wildebeest takes your breath away.
------------------------------
A fly taking a shit takes your breath away.
--------------------------------
Maggots on raw meat takes your breath away.
--------------------------------
darksock's mom eating a pastrami sandwich takes your breath away.
Samarai Scrote has to be nominated somewhere...
also, Surfer Kelly for hottest hott
also, Surfer Kelly for hottest hott
# posted by : 8:01 AM
: 8:01 AM
I don't know what happened to the "Most Deserving of a Trashcan to the Head" category from last year, but Scroteboy Slim and his illiterate babble about going to Cornell has to be in the running...
...and by running, I mean running for his life. Him and is stupid tattoo.
...and by running, I mean running for his life. Him and is stupid tattoo.
Hottest Girl-Next-Door Hott:
Mary-Kate Molson from March. plus, she's playing pool. i'd put my 2 ball in her middle pocket.
Mary-Kate Molson from March. plus, she's playing pool. i'd put my 2 ball in her middle pocket.
I don't see any categories here that he would fit in, but I really hope Fist of Power gets a nomination.
# posted by : 8:12 AM
: 8:12 AM
Douchiest TV Show: the newly premiered "From G's to Gents." Only the douchiest, most retarded fools try to act like gentlemen, and fail miserably.
# posted by : 8:17 AM
: 8:17 AM
Hottest Hott - Deathtongue's Girl. I don't care who the other nominees are...
I'm still dreaming about her.
I'm still dreaming about her.
douchiest hair goes to wheat stalks that also contains one of darksocks most funniest comments ever, which he should also get best baghunter...or pfah or mr. white or there are so damn many...
douchiest hair- clearly hawk has to be in the running.
Douchiest celeb: I don't know if they were ever posted, but really, shouldn't brian austin green and meagan fox be in there....the dude's initials spell bag for godssake.
Bag hunter: Include Pfah, if only for his harrowing experience with SS a few weeks ago.
Bag huntress: Amanda should probably be in there for her 5 part pictorial...classic. Also...Mrs. White for putting up with Mr. White.
Douchiest celeb: I don't know if they were ever posted, but really, shouldn't brian austin green and meagan fox be in there....the dude's initials spell bag for godssake.
Bag hunter: Include Pfah, if only for his harrowing experience with SS a few weeks ago.
Bag huntress: Amanda should probably be in there for her 5 part pictorial...classic. Also...Mrs. White for putting up with Mr. White.
I only started posting on here over the summer so I'm probably skipping a few.
Still Life With Coors Light has to go to the Guggenheim.
Smearkat's hott gets the golden globes.
Douchiest TV show? How about Ghost Adventurers? Wherein a douchebag taunts "ghosts" and generally acts like a pussy.
Hottest Next Door Hott: The redhead with Malignant Melanoma. I have dreams where she comes out of a fog riding a stallion and carries me off into a lake. Or wrestles me in a vat of crisco. Depends on the day, really.
Best 'Baghunter, I'd say a tie between Crucial Head and Baron Von Goolo, just by a smidge.
Still Life With Coors Light has to go to the Guggenheim.
Smearkat's hott gets the golden globes.
Douchiest TV show? How about Ghost Adventurers? Wherein a douchebag taunts "ghosts" and generally acts like a pussy.
Hottest Next Door Hott: The redhead with Malignant Melanoma. I have dreams where she comes out of a fog riding a stallion and carries me off into a lake. Or wrestles me in a vat of crisco. Depends on the day, really.
Best 'Baghunter, I'd say a tie between Crucial Head and Baron Von Goolo, just by a smidge.
Hottest Hott: Hour Glass, but that's subject to change as I over look them some more.
Best Golden Globes: Four Points cause they're real
Smells Like Poo: Artificial Douchetelligence
Most Expensive First Date Hott:Hamster Hott (aka Amanda), cause she looks like I would have to take her to something classier than an Olive Garden
Douchiest Hair: The Hawk- Oct.
Douchiest Facial Expression: Short Boat
Most Annoying 'Bagling:
The Ricky (aka "Douchiest Everybag"): Can I vote for DJ Bello? If not, HJBBaD
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: The Four Horsemen. Those boobies didn't stand a chance.
Hottest Girl-Next-Door Hott: Old Chap's Hott
Most Innovative New 'Bag Maneuver: The "hold my shirt up with my mouth, while the two bleeths who I have my arms around point at my abs" by Mencken in Sept.
Most Likely to be Part of the Permanent Collection of the Guggenheim in 2023: Mooby
Clearest Proof of Natural Selection: Scroteboy Slim? Not exactly sure what this category is looking for, so I went with the Douche that's trying to evolve (ie go to college)
Best 'Bag Hunter of the Year (Comments Threads): Darksock. I think I explained it well when I said his comments make you feel like you just stepped in poop. Awkwardly enjoyable. Then we made the poo sock club...
Best 'Bag Huntress of the Year (Comments Threads): Medusa Oblongata
Douchiest TV Show of the Year: From G's to Gents
Douchiest HCwDB Celebrity Couple
of the Year: I don't follow celebrities enough to know...but whoever John Mayer is with, or if anyone is soiling the nethers of Natalie Portman anymore. Or whoever Criss Angel is dating.
Best Golden Globes: Four Points cause they're real
Smells Like Poo: Artificial Douchetelligence
Most Expensive First Date Hott:Hamster Hott (aka Amanda), cause she looks like I would have to take her to something classier than an Olive Garden
Douchiest Hair: The Hawk- Oct.
Douchiest Facial Expression: Short Boat
Most Annoying 'Bagling:
The Ricky (aka "Douchiest Everybag"): Can I vote for DJ Bello? If not, HJBBaD
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: The Four Horsemen. Those boobies didn't stand a chance.
Hottest Girl-Next-Door Hott: Old Chap's Hott
Most Innovative New 'Bag Maneuver: The "hold my shirt up with my mouth, while the two bleeths who I have my arms around point at my abs" by Mencken in Sept.
Most Likely to be Part of the Permanent Collection of the Guggenheim in 2023: Mooby
Clearest Proof of Natural Selection: Scroteboy Slim? Not exactly sure what this category is looking for, so I went with the Douche that's trying to evolve (ie go to college)
Best 'Bag Hunter of the Year (Comments Threads): Darksock. I think I explained it well when I said his comments make you feel like you just stepped in poop. Awkwardly enjoyable. Then we made the poo sock club...
Best 'Bag Huntress of the Year (Comments Threads): Medusa Oblongata
Douchiest TV Show of the Year: From G's to Gents
Douchiest HCwDB Celebrity Couple
of the Year: I don't follow celebrities enough to know...but whoever John Mayer is with, or if anyone is soiling the nethers of Natalie Portman anymore. Or whoever Criss Angel is dating.
Honorary "Best 'Bag Huntress of the Year" should go to Elizabeth Banks for her unexpected plug of the site on The Tonight Show. Not only did she claim to be inspired, she also reveled in mocking the bags while explaining it to Jay Leno.
In addition, her asking of "Whyyyyy?" would also apply to Marissa Miller's inexplicable affinity for douchebags. (See above photo examples)
In addition, her asking of "Whyyyyy?" would also apply to Marissa Miller's inexplicable affinity for douchebags. (See above photo examples)
i agree w/ mike - still life with coors lite is THE best photograph qua photograph on the site and needs to win the Guggenheim. If Diane Arbus were still around, she'd have taken that photo - it's just that good.
I need some time and a lot of likker to figure out the rest of them. It'll take some serious research. And when I say Research I mean massive hango over inducing drinking binge, because otherwise I would simply pass out or kill myself after exposing my self to that much scrotewankery and boobage. (pronounced: boo-bahzh)
I need some time and a lot of likker to figure out the rest of them. It'll take some serious research. And when I say Research I mean massive hango over inducing drinking binge, because otherwise I would simply pass out or kill myself after exposing my self to that much scrotewankery and boobage. (pronounced: boo-bahzh)
Awesome!! I can’t even begin to put forth any nominations at this point. I need to do some research. And by research, I mean alcoholic beverages.
I’ve been traveling to various jobsites throughout the Southwest for work the past few days. Gotta make sure my erections don’t fall down, if ya know what I mean. Which, I hate.
The traveling I hate. Not the job, nor the erections.
I. Need. A. Drink.
Is it Friday yet?
I’ve been traveling to various jobsites throughout the Southwest for work the past few days. Gotta make sure my erections don’t fall down, if ya know what I mean. Which, I hate.
The traveling I hate. Not the job, nor the erections.
I. Need. A. Drink.
Is it Friday yet?
Elizabeth Banks should be recognized as a great Celebrity Anti-bleeth, but she didn't post in the comment threads. Otherwise I agree with you Don't Wheeze.
Archidoucheis, I just think the lovely Ms. Banks should at least receive an Honorable Mention, but not an actual award per se.
Unless, of course, she does begin posting here. That would kick ass!
Unless, of course, she does begin posting here. That would kick ass!
I agree. She should get a "Behind Enemy Lines" award for being an anti-bleeth in the epicenter of bagidness. And for being hot.
the brainpower necessary to cull a list of nominess together will indeed require the midwifing services of a gallon of jameson, a handful of tylenol 4's, rubber gloves, a subscription to horse society, and a shorn lemur. in other words, a regular friday evening at chateau douchetoevosky. check with me then.
however in advance of that my nominees for bag hunter of the year (in no particular order):
BVG
Darksock
Mr. White
Crucial
pfah
Steve Zodiac
BCS
however in advance of that my nominees for bag hunter of the year (in no particular order):
BVG
Darksock
Mr. White
Crucial
pfah
Steve Zodiac
BCS
I hereby nominate Melon Butt for Best Golden Globes, because it didn't specify that said globes must be of the frontal chesticular variety.
# posted by : 10:19 AM
: 10:19 AM
I hereby nominate Melon Butt for Best Golden Globes, because it didn't specify that said globes must be of the frontal chesticular variety.
# posted by : 10:19 AM
: 10:19 AM
Douchiest TV Show? The Pickup Artist. Hands down. Teaches relatively normal guys to be douche bags. ugh.
# posted by : 10:44 AM
: 10:44 AM
I agree with pfah on Mary Kate Molson...an underappreciated delight...
I'm also fond of the Sultry Ski Bunny of Perfection. And Zippy's Hott makes my pants fit differently.
HJBBAD and DJ Bello are neck and neck for Most Annoying 'Bagling.
Jacques should be considered for Smells like Poo and/or Douchiest Facial expression.
And I could see Millennium Bag in the Guggenheim.
I'm also fond of the Sultry Ski Bunny of Perfection. And Zippy's Hott makes my pants fit differently.
HJBBAD and DJ Bello are neck and neck for Most Annoying 'Bagling.
Jacques should be considered for Smells like Poo and/or Douchiest Facial expression.
And I could see Millennium Bag in the Guggenheim.
# posted by : 10:45 AM
: 10:45 AM 
@douchetoevsky
Hey haven't seen you in a minute! I'll take a shot with you, but you're on your own with the horses...I prefer dolphins myself.
@Crucial Head
Yea I'm right there with you...I'm gonna have to give this some thought. And by thought I mean, throw rotten chunks of Mahi Mahi at this list on my screen and whoever it sticks on wins.
Hey haven't seen you in a minute! I'll take a shot with you, but you're on your own with the horses...I prefer dolphins myself.
@Crucial Head
Yea I'm right there with you...I'm gonna have to give this some thought. And by thought I mean, throw rotten chunks of Mahi Mahi at this list on my screen and whoever it sticks on wins.
i'll be waiting for the nominations to come in. sadly enough, i've been out of the loop for too long to speak with authority here.
will there be a category for group scrote? i rather enjoyed the douche platoon last year.
tv show: the pick-up artist, seriously how could anything else even come close?
celebrity couple: marissa miller makes a strong case above
guggenheim: still life w/ coors
maneuver: the headlock/chokehold thing, i don't remember if this was as popular last year, at least it seems newer
hot: deathtongue's
natural selection: dna dan...or perhaps this is proof against?
tv show: the pick-up artist, seriously how could anything else even come close?
celebrity couple: marissa miller makes a strong case above
guggenheim: still life w/ coors
maneuver: the headlock/chokehold thing, i don't remember if this was as popular last year, at least it seems newer
hot: deathtongue's
natural selection: dna dan...or perhaps this is proof against?
# posted by : 11:32 AM
: 11:32 AM
I have to think about my nominee choices for awhile. There is just so much douche to choose from.
Best bag hunter should probably be between:
Darsock, Bcs, Mr. White, Crucial, and pfah.
Best bag huntress should probably be between:
Amanda,Medusa, and Buffy the Scrotebag Slayer (haha, that's me)
Hey DB1, you should post pictures of the hunters and huntresses if you have any of them. That way we could place a face to the glory.
Best bag hunter should probably be between:
Darsock, Bcs, Mr. White, Crucial, and pfah.
Best bag huntress should probably be between:
Amanda,Medusa, and Buffy the Scrotebag Slayer (haha, that's me)
Hey DB1, you should post pictures of the hunters and huntresses if you have any of them. That way we could place a face to the glory.
# posted by : 11:38 AM
: 11:38 AM
Looks like I didn't vote for most annoying bag correctly as I messed that up with The Ricky
Most Annoying Bag: DJ Bello, or HJBBaD (if the DJ is either not able to be voted for, or if he's getting recognition some other way)
The Ricky: Scroteboy Slim
I'd also like to add the hott from 1994's Muggs and Alba back in July for Hottest Hott.
Most Annoying Bag: DJ Bello, or HJBBaD (if the DJ is either not able to be voted for, or if he's getting recognition some other way)
The Ricky: Scroteboy Slim
I'd also like to add the hott from 1994's Muggs and Alba back in July for Hottest Hott.
I think FUNG should win the "Smells Like Poo" award, theres no one remotely close to smelling as poopy as him.
# posted by : 11:43 AM
: 11:43 AM
Ok here we go, hopefully I didn't miss too many:
Hottest Hott:
Hourglass
Boston Teat Party
Deathtongue's hott
The Yak's hott
Most Expensive First Date Hott:
Ms. Hamster
Zippy's hott
Golden Globes:
4 Points, end of discussion
Poo:
Bagwatch Nights
Predatorbag
Fung
Douchiest Hair:
The Torch
Hair Supply (not a fan of the Hawk)
Douchiest facial expression:
X-Lax
Metaphysical Hooligan
Crawdaddy
Scrotey Mariner
Most Annoying:
Crotch Grabber
O-Prune
Droopy McScrote
Everybag:
Midwestern Bag
Herb the Office Boy
Crisis of Modernity:
The Dingo
HJBBAD
Girl Next Door Hott:
Stonebag
Chick from fanmail on 10/30
Bagling Hunters on 9/2
Worst New Bag Maneuver:
Mencken's mouth shirt-pull
Sideburn Harry's fake phone call pose
Samurai Scrote, you know . . .
Guggenheim submission:
Millenium Bag (still futuristic even then)
Acey Douchey (so many of the right characteristics, easy to use as learning tool)
Proof of Natural Selection:
DNA Dan
Crapser
Fung
Flex 'N' Face
Celebrity Bag:
Kriss Angel
Best Ass:
Ass Not What Your Country Can Do For You . . .
Hottest Hott:
Hourglass
Boston Teat Party
Deathtongue's hott
The Yak's hott
Most Expensive First Date Hott:
Ms. Hamster
Zippy's hott
Golden Globes:
4 Points, end of discussion
Poo:
Bagwatch Nights
Predatorbag
Fung
Douchiest Hair:
The Torch
Hair Supply (not a fan of the Hawk)
Douchiest facial expression:
X-Lax
Metaphysical Hooligan
Crawdaddy
Scrotey Mariner
Most Annoying:
Crotch Grabber
O-Prune
Droopy McScrote
Everybag:
Midwestern Bag
Herb the Office Boy
Crisis of Modernity:
The Dingo
HJBBAD
Girl Next Door Hott:
Stonebag
Chick from fanmail on 10/30
Bagling Hunters on 9/2
Worst New Bag Maneuver:
Mencken's mouth shirt-pull
Sideburn Harry's fake phone call pose
Samurai Scrote, you know . . .
Guggenheim submission:
Millenium Bag (still futuristic even then)
Acey Douchey (so many of the right characteristics, easy to use as learning tool)
Proof of Natural Selection:
DNA Dan
Crapser
Fung
Flex 'N' Face
Celebrity Bag:
Kriss Angel
Best Ass:
Ass Not What Your Country Can Do For You . . .
Douchiest TV Show: The Pick-up Artist. It's a douche training course. And one word: Mystery(not to mention his side-kick The Matador, really you call you self The Matador, wow)
# posted by : 12:25 PM
: 12:25 PM
BTW Most Likely to be Part of the Permanent Collection of the Guggenheim in 2023:
Still Life w/ Coors Light
FTW!
Still Life w/ Coors Light
FTW!
Ok. Umm yeah... I'll have to abstain from voting this year because I feel that the further glorification of any douchebag will only serve to inflate said douchebags already inflated ego. Furthermore the objectification of young ladies on this site is both deplorable and despicable, with the exception of Flyteeth and maybe sock I'm quite certain that all of you crawled out of a woman's womb shortly before you took your first gasp of air. Your mothers/sisters/cousins/wives should be ashamed of all of you. I refuse to participate in another annual event that will only serve to increase the degradation of our collective moral fabric.
That and BCS is totally effin right! Deathtounge's hott FTW!!
And since I missed most of the year due to uhhh work, drugs, being duct taped and stored in a closet for most of the year, I am giving my proxy vote to BCS for any and all categories.
@BCS good call on Deathhott man! I would say that I totally forgot about her but that's not entirely accurate. I've single handedly kept Kleenex's stock moving in a positive direction to her all year.
That and BCS is totally effin right! Deathtounge's hott FTW!!
And since I missed most of the year due to uhhh work, drugs, being duct taped and stored in a closet for most of the year, I am giving my proxy vote to BCS for any and all categories.
@BCS good call on Deathhott man! I would say that I totally forgot about her but that's not entirely accurate. I've single handedly kept Kleenex's stock moving in a positive direction to her all year.
I know it's not a "Celebrity Couple", but Steelers kicker Jeff Reed has to take home some sort of award. Even his pic on TV when they played the Colts had a "blowout."
# posted by : 2:17 PM
: 2:17 PM
I thought about turd flush too for the smells like poo award. Him and Appendix Albert, and Don. Cause Don's just so Fred Flintstone goes on an all night meth binger funny looking.
Clearest proof of natural selecton: PUMPY
Golden globes: Brian Earlicker and Lila's Alzadoes
Smells like poo: crapster the unfriendly douche
Guggenheim: Fung. Kenner can be put in some other wax museum.
Annoying bagling: he just bangs bitches and drinks
Most expensive first date: little carmacita smells poo
hottest girl next door hott: crapster's mamacita
hottest hott: purg hottie or FSDU's hott in the costume contest
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: brothabag leon
Golden globes: Brian Earlicker and Lila's Alzadoes
Smells like poo: crapster the unfriendly douche
Guggenheim: Fung. Kenner can be put in some other wax museum.
Annoying bagling: he just bangs bitches and drinks
Most expensive first date: little carmacita smells poo
hottest girl next door hott: crapster's mamacita
hottest hott: purg hottie or FSDU's hott in the costume contest
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: brothabag leon
@ douchetoevosky
I agree with your worthy nominations for bag hunters as the names on your list dole out the jabs on a consistent basis however I am all for the "open format" popularized by tennis and golf.
Match ups may be tough depending on the draw but I also think a bracket set up like the NCAA basketball playoffs .
New guys like yours truly would be a 16 seed for sure but catch a guy on a bad day or with a topic right up your alley and an intersting scrum could be enjoyed.
Or does that make too much sense?
I agree with your worthy nominations for bag hunters as the names on your list dole out the jabs on a consistent basis however I am all for the "open format" popularized by tennis and golf.
Match ups may be tough depending on the draw but I also think a bracket set up like the NCAA basketball playoffs .
New guys like yours truly would be a 16 seed for sure but catch a guy on a bad day or with a topic right up your alley and an intersting scrum could be enjoyed.
Or does that make too much sense?
Regarding the celebridouche couple category, do both parties have to be celebs? If not, then I nominate Marissa Miller and Ass Pimple.
# posted by : 3:39 PM
: 3:39 PM
okay i said i wasn't gonna weigh into this nomination process, but now i have to nominate skanky redhead from Douchestral Cycle II as Most Expensive First Date Hott. or some other category to honor this skanky bitch. there. i said it.
As Requested:
Still Life With Coors Lite
It is a work of art. I've been an active professional artist for decades. I know my brake fluid and this is the real stuff.
If Diane Arbus did colour and lived in Las Vegas, she would have shot this picture.
Still Life With Coors Lite
It is a work of art. I've been an active professional artist for decades. I know my brake fluid and this is the real stuff.
If Diane Arbus did colour and lived in Las Vegas, she would have shot this picture.
Don't forget Highly Doucherous for his aweful acid reflux expression while surrounded by two yummy bikini babes for Douchiest Facial Expression
Douchiest TV show of the year:
Million Dollar Listing
Pick Up Artist 2
Rehab (a show about Rehab on TruTV)
Million Dollar Listing
Pick Up Artist 2
Rehab (a show about Rehab on TruTV)
# posted by : 6:47 PM
: 6:47 PM
Greatest Crisis of Modernity: Post Firecracker Exploded Ants Brown Mushy Paste, Why There is No Hope for Mankind
Best Golden Globes: Bag/Not a Bag, January 16, left hott; Smearkat's hott, Ass Not What Your Country Can Do For You
The Ricky: Midwestern Bag, Herb the Office Boy
Douchiest Facial Expression: The Lizard Scrote, Wednesday Limerick, February 20; Shortboat
Hottest Hott: Eurobag/Not a Eurobag, January 4; 2001: A Space Douche hotts, Homies in Da Lobby hotts
Girl Next Door Hott: Grenade Tosser Hott, Sultry Ski Bunny of Perfection, Halo Angel
Douchiest Hair: Turtleman, Eraserhead, The Metaphysical Hooligan
Most Innovative Maneuver:
Wednesday Limerick, February 6; Flex n' Face, Mencken
Clearest Proof of Natural Selection: DNA Dan, Smog Magogs
Most Expensive First Date Hott: Frankie the Water Guy hott
Smells Like Poo: The Bagnana Daiquiri, Miami Scammy, The Turd Flush
Guggenheim: HJBB&D's writing(February 28, specifically), Still Life with Coors Light
Most Annoying: HJBB&D, DJ Bello, Donkey Douche
Bag Hunter: Crucial Head, Darksock
Bag Huntress: Medusa Oblongata
TV Show: The Hills, The Pick-up Artist
Celebrity Couple: Spencer & Heidi
Best Golden Globes: Bag/Not a Bag, January 16, left hott; Smearkat's hott, Ass Not What Your Country Can Do For You
The Ricky: Midwestern Bag, Herb the Office Boy
Douchiest Facial Expression: The Lizard Scrote, Wednesday Limerick, February 20; Shortboat
Hottest Hott: Eurobag/Not a Eurobag, January 4; 2001: A Space Douche hotts, Homies in Da Lobby hotts
Girl Next Door Hott: Grenade Tosser Hott, Sultry Ski Bunny of Perfection, Halo Angel
Douchiest Hair: Turtleman, Eraserhead, The Metaphysical Hooligan
Most Innovative Maneuver:
Wednesday Limerick, February 6; Flex n' Face, Mencken
Clearest Proof of Natural Selection: DNA Dan, Smog Magogs
Most Expensive First Date Hott: Frankie the Water Guy hott
Smells Like Poo: The Bagnana Daiquiri, Miami Scammy, The Turd Flush
Guggenheim: HJBB&D's writing(February 28, specifically), Still Life with Coors Light
Most Annoying: HJBB&D, DJ Bello, Donkey Douche
Bag Hunter: Crucial Head, Darksock
Bag Huntress: Medusa Oblongata
TV Show: The Hills, The Pick-up Artist
Celebrity Couple: Spencer & Heidi
Douchiest TV show
there were too many comments for me to check to see if this was already there but:
THE PICKUP ARTIST 2
Taking poor socially crippled well meaning dorks and making them don the trimmings of douche. Also I can't even believe Mystery is real and personally as a woman, I would spontaneously combust if I saw him walking on the street. If he tried to hit on my I would start bleeding from my eyes, s**t from my mouth and vomit from my ass.
there were too many comments for me to check to see if this was already there but:
THE PICKUP ARTIST 2
Taking poor socially crippled well meaning dorks and making them don the trimmings of douche. Also I can't even believe Mystery is real and personally as a woman, I would spontaneously combust if I saw him walking on the street. If he tried to hit on my I would start bleeding from my eyes, s**t from my mouth and vomit from my ass.
# posted by : 8:35 PM
: 8:35 PM
Didn't Brett Michaels use his notoriety [sic] in a reality TV series to get some poon?
He's a douche but did they have any hotts on it?
He's a douche but did they have any hotts on it?
The Guggenheim in 2023 cannot be without The Blowfish - April 08. That guy haunts me.
Hottest Girl-Next-Door must include The Yak's girl in early April.
DB, if you have a girl next door category, let's have an opposite Dirty girl category - that's Veronica, hands down.
Hottest Girl-Next-Door must include The Yak's girl in early April.
DB, if you have a girl next door category, let's have an opposite Dirty girl category - that's Veronica, hands down.
# posted by : 9:06 PM
: 9:06 PM
Okay, I've scrolled right down and skipped reading the others, for now at least.
Whatever category she is, and I'm not sure, you just gotta include Ass Pear.
I say that as I munch sweetly and quietly away on a tasty Bartlett, although an Anjou is fair competition. Whatever HERS is, it belongs in YOUR competition.
Whatever category she is, and I'm not sure, you just gotta include Ass Pear.
I say that as I munch sweetly and quietly away on a tasty Bartlett, although an Anjou is fair competition. Whatever HERS is, it belongs in YOUR competition.
# posted by : 9:10 PM
: 9:10 PM