This photo stirs my nihilistic tendencies. Seriously.

He is your regulation scrote shade of pumpkin, has a freakin FAUXHAWK, and is wearing a dogtag with a pinstrip jacket. He needs to be repeatedly punched in the jaw.

Blondie on the left is cute and only looks to be about half bleeth. The one on the right... well... basketball sized implants, IMO, automatically make her a bleeth beyond redemption.
 

Where is everyone today? There is supposedly a recession going on, but everyone must be out buying DB1's book as holiday gifts!

and yes they are hot ... but he is only about 10% douche ... thanks for not testing our post- Thanksgiving inflated guts DB1!
 

there's a douche, but no hot chicks in this photo...
 

I think those two on the right can kill a 12-year-old, but what a way to go.
 

@anonymous 12:50 pm

i respectfully beg to differ on your assertion this "guy" is but 10% dbag. please note: diamond earrings in each lobe, tanning-salon hue of disgrace, black tanktop with bright orange trim under pin stripe suit with badge of ed hardy, wearing dog tags even though he'd scream like a little girl at the first sound of gunfire if on the front, drinking a cup of what im guessing is his boyfriend's urine.

these hotts are nott. the one on the left is a hotter version of rosie perez and the one on the right is the form Low Self-Esteem takes when it visits the physical plane. though their presence arguably compromises this picture's legitimacy to be on "hot chicks with douchebags" they make him even more of a douchebag because he seems so impressed with himself to be photographed with such tragic stabs at beauty. thus his douchebagicity is unquestioned, as is his presence on this site.

he even pinstriped his hair.

- DJ Jazzy Douche
 

i thought this blog was called hot chicks with douchebags.
 

He's pumpkin flavored.

And the half drunk girl on the right looks like she's paid for those implants with brain cells.
 

Ahhhh, someone missed a couple of Jenny Craig meetings.
 

Meet Pacina, the daughter of the Tobacconist from Amarcord. Wipe that vapid smile off your face and let me reenact that scene in endless takes.
 

The Hank Azaria look-alike is a flaming douche, as in his attire needs to be set on fire. And the chick on the left seems wrong in some way. But yall just keep talking about the girl on the right, because she's all mine. I'll eat her up BigMacAttack style.
 

I would motorboat them all night and then put it in her pooper
 

I believe something akin to Frankenhooker needs to take place here.

The chesticles of the healthy girl on the right need to be removed and placed upon burgeoning cougar hott on the left.
 

I feel like there should be at least one comment that's on-topic, so here:

That article was about Lynx bodyspray, not Axe. Lynx, clearly, does not adhere to the strict standards of quality and safety that Axe does. Though would it be so bad if Axe killed off a few überchoads?
 

What the hell is that on Left's upper lip? Looks like a particularly nasssty chancre.
 

@ F Mcbaggin 2:21
Frankenhooker, heh. Hopefully the douche in the middle can be convinced to try the Supercrack.

I was horrified Thanksgiving morning about Axe deodorant, actually, I'm glad the topic had come up. I awoke at my mom's house, late as usual, and most of the out-of-town family had made it in during the night and were getting about making the food. I dragged myself to the shower and, as I turned to the sink, I froze in terror at the sight of a stick of Axe deodorant on the counter. Whose was it? Where did it come from? Which of my kin was beginning to douche? My mind raced. Would the rest of us be infected? Would I, a professional 'baghunter, have an obligation to search and destroy said 'bagling before he fully morphed into the orange abortions I battle daily? Did I have an obligation to warn the others and get them to safety?

Just then, a paralyzing thought came into my mind....what if he knows? What if he knows I am a bagslayer and has come to destroy me? I would be consumed in some sort of douche Quickening....I thought of making a Blair-witch style video for you, in case I never made it back. You know, me crying by flashlight, dripping snot onto the camera as I say how much I love you....

Needless to say, I survived and never found the culpirit. But I wait, I wait...ever vigilant....
 

Medusa-

I'm here, because I'm not in America, so T-day is just another Thursday around here.

Re: someone in your clan getting the Axe -

You need to look at it from a more ideological perspective - doucheness is something the ISA (Ideological State Apparatus - Althusser - look it up) advocates as it leads people away from consciousness of their material relations to production and the alienation imposed by capitalist relations of production, and thusly, their actions lead to consumption rather than revolution.

So, in this way, whoever in your clan acquired the AX deoderant probably did so because it was on sale at wallmart, and had no idea of its symbolic status as a tool of poo.

Never attribute to malevolence when simple ignorance or incompetence will suffice.

You might want to bring it up over some beers with your male relatives -

"Hey who bought the AX? Ya know only greasy douchebags wear that crap...."
 

@Heather
"she's paid for those implants with brain cells"... funnier and truer words have probably never been spoken of this woman
 

Hmmm, well, they may or may not be implants, but given her general all-over roundedness, I'm gonna hazard a guess they might just be real boobies.
Interestingly enough, the ladies with the really large natural knockers are not quite as eager to show the skin on them as the wannabes with the fake tits. There are always exceptions.
Anyway, who cares about the left and middle people when a pair of tits like those are showing so much cleavage?
You can rub that AXE out of your eyes right now.
 

Simple rule on Axe/Tag: unless you're in middle/high school, you shouldn't use it. Save your pennies and buy real deodorant and cologne (but use within reason).
 

Mitchum is nice stuff, but when I want to smell nice, I splash on the Old Spice, and have done so for years. My lady loves it, brings back the reminiscing.
 

This picture says: RPG, IED, and WTF all at he same time.
 

@ whoop-di-douche -

I can absolutely guarantee you those are implants. I am 110% certain.
 

Yes! This was my question!!! It's like i'm almost kinda famous in a small way!
 

I see 3 jerks who hit the clearance rack at Macy's and didn't try the shit on and look at themselves in the mirror before they went out.

And in the middle of these 3 jerks I see one squid dick who goes to clubs and milks 1 drink for an entire night as he works his magic as the next up-and-coming club promoter.

The sad truth of the matter is he always had 2 good semi-looking chicks on his arms - his cousin and his cousin's girlfriend. The reality of the situation is he happily bangs his cousin.

And to those of you who think those tits are fake: take a gander at her sausage fingers and baloney-filled arms. Those tits are real boys and girls. She's a chubby chick who took a surprisingly decent phot that night.

Christ her fingers are so chubby they say Jimmy Dean on them.
 

LOL Plinky!

Amen to that. I can spot a set of fakes a mile away. If she took them out of their protective shell I'd be willing to bet they drop to her navel. They look nicley pushed-up and rounded like fakes, but they don't have that hard-top, puffy look. However, I have been fooled before, if they are fake, they're incredible. But I would be willing to place a small wager based on her ample hands and upper arms that those are the ta-tas the good lord blessed her with. And did he hever bless her, Amen and Halleluja!!!
 

AXE does not make deodorants. Only odorants.

Common mistake. But your "friends" (wink wink) are still douchebags.
 

And I'm with heather: fake. What we're witnessing is the rare hott that, either through design or laziness, affords herself the bodyfat to merely make them appear real.

And a damn fine job of it too.

But please - don't tell me that we're so used to seeing bleeths built like a No. 2 pencil jammed through a pair of Hostess SnoBalls that we don't even know what fake looks like anymore.
 

Axe and Tag are super douchey. I would rather use manjunk!
 

Yeah there is no reason to ever use AXE or Tag deodorant or whatever you wanna call it. get some real deodorant or tell your moms to stop buying it for you.
 

After careful examination from multiple angles, I gotta' go with...

FAKE.

No creases, wrinkles, stretch marks or anything that resembles the real McCoy twins.

I'm thinking she's a chubber who was NOT well endowed. And, rather than diet and exercise to get down to a good fighting weight, she opted for the silicon saviour to "even things out" for her.

@ Medusa

I'm scared for you.

Damn.

An Axe user in your mother's home? That's a horrid thought. What surprised me, though, is that you had to SEE the label to know what it was! I would have thought that once the lid was taken off, you would have instantly been awakened from your slumber.
 

this is just "chicks with douchebag."

who decides whether the girls are actually hot?
 

I can only see douchebags. Remember, women have the ability to be total douchebags too, these 'two' being prime examples of that