And then the bears ate them.
 

Bag boy to lane 5, bag boy to lane 5, we have a triple bagger emergency here.
 

pig nosed beaverbag douchin' it up in spotted hat & jockey briefs in the background... sheesh, release the hounds
 

this is the closest i've gotten to landing the first comment for a pic. in a long while at least.

did i mention i have a soft spot for white bikinis? just for today that is.
 

Wow, it's been a day, but I'm back...same bag time...same bag channel!
 

This is a familiar spot for photos of douchebags. It resembles a monkey habitat at the zoo.

It is, however, a monkey habitat at a Vegas pool. Which one? Who cares.

Polka Dottie CockPerch in the back there, who uses words like succulent to describe how much he loves phallus, is wearing the same Osh Kosh briefs as my 3 year old.

The difference is my 3 year old doesn't shit himself and I'm fairly certain that's what this tool is doing in this photo.
 

Captain Underpants in the background looks like he is wearing an old Twister mat as a mandana....this has to be Rehab, just saw the show on TV and it just proves everything we say is...true

Hazim the 85th Prince Heir to the Saudi Kingdom, looks like his breaking a few commandments from the Koran
 

a Scene from the movie Habib Yosef's Day off (2008)
 

In honor of the October 21st Caption This post:

Serj knew that the only way to avert the impeding bite, by the world’s only known captive Red-Striped Polar Bear, would come by applying corn to his dog via Lucinda’s rectal Batter n’ Bake™ delivery device.
 

At the World’s Largest Rectal Polyp competition, endoscope technician Shavo Nalbanian applies his legendary skill, while judge Wee-Wee Man indicates the score to the jubilant crowd.
 

Brünhilde knew her multi-cultural relationship with Yurislob Djurkoff was getting a bit strained when he unfurled his hirsute foreskin to the astonishment of everyone at the pool.
 

Ha, check out Eurofag in the background.
 

hahahaha this pic is so funny
 

I'm new to this site and it's a weird sensation to be simultaneously doubled over in pain from laughing at the comments and also sweattin' the incredible hotness of the hotts!!!!
 

Red bikini whispers, "now stick it in her mouth"
 

I knew there was a real reason I hated Derek Jeter. I think both girls in this pic have bat-shit crazy eyes--one from meth, the other from the roofies.
 

I was at that zoo last week, my youngest got sick, so I had to miss the new Douche/Bleeth Exhibit.

ASvB
 

holy schnikes! It looks like Rehab went to the shetter. Not a single hott in the pic and lots of cack. The Blonde up by the Cabanas may be a hott, but can't tell.

Wow how the HR has gone downhill during the week.

On to the Golden Nugget pool!
 

Rico Pasquale, human suppository, did what he does best; unaware that behind him Manny the human disco helicopter light had flicked his nose switch to "Death Boogie".

Holy Shiite, T&D; where you been? First Plinky, now you...as you can see, our work is far from done.
 

yeah who's next? Bag Out, Douche Vader, Jailer Girl, Mitch Meats? bring 'em all back & have 'em fling poo on this pile!
 

we could also use a dose of Squatch & Poo Convention
 

not to mention Ed
 

Looks like John Secada got himself caught in a Bleeth Trap...
 

lofls @ darksock

"Manny the human disco helicopter light" Is my hero of the day.

I used to have a website in my favorites folder that was nothing but pictured being ruined (intentionally or otherwise)by someone in the background.

The fact that MHDHL is obviously picture bombing this semi-sentient coalesced glob of sewer flotsam makes him a hero, and not in any way douche, regardless of his attire, which I surmise is meant to be funny.
 

What's with the dumbshit touching his nose while standing around in his Y fronts?
 

*pictures

--my apology for the typos and grammatical retardations, I am both hung over and sick this Sunday morning.
 

I just noticed the trio of monkeydouches hanging on the rail above them, ogling on like a troupe of inferior macaques observing their alpha about to rail the only females in the group who were ironically and sadly also the trio's sisters, whom the trio still wanted to bang.

Later, Billy, Javier, and Armondo all separately frequented the local brothels in a vain attempt to purge the wall flower shame and excess mating fluids from their greasy bodies.
 

I do believe this is the most disgusting male I've seen featured on HCwDB.
 

I agree with Amanda; the redhead's facial expression is not flattering.
 

I'm not sure to which male Amanda is referring. They all look pretty silly.
 

Ginger looks like she could ear corn on the cob through a picket fence; she also looks like she could shit cornpoo through the same fence.
 

I looked into an enclosure like this when I was looking at monkeys in a Japanese zoo. Shit, I could have just stopped in Vegas and saved another 16 hours of flying. And as much as those monkeys made me laugh (c'mon, who doesn't laugh at monkeys?) these douchebags make me laugh more.
 

Gainin: Disco Helicopter Dude would be an awesome sidekick for Samurai Scrote. This needs to happen somehow.
 

I think the retard's gesture in the foreground says it all, "Smells like poo", indeed.

I dunno about the guys, but the girls are definitely a Stage 4 Bleeth. Bitches look rode hard & put up wet, if ya know what I mean.

And is that Heather Graham in the red??
 

I just had to sweat out a second half victory by my cardinal and gold boys over the trees of Stanford… but it was worth every minute because I can come back to this dirty picture and unleash holy hell.
 

Gainindouche I mean. Stupid iPhone autocorrect feature.
 

Polka dot hat? Really?

Did someone smash a disco ball lamp on his head?
 

I think Darksock's just drunk...

Heh heh.
 

Alejandro and Nestor awkwardly nurse their straws, in a vain attempt to divert their gaze away from
Conductor Harry Kasparov’s botched ‘train wreck’ exhibit below.
 

And by lamp, I mean: We ALL love Lamp.
 

Ilka leaned in for one last confidence boosting earlobe-nibble, before Shiesh Kabob declared his unrequited allegiance to Kabbalah.

And with a swift severance of his unclean prepuce, at the hands of Mistress Mohel Monique’s: ‘Talented Turd Cutter,’ his rite of passage was complete.
 

"EAT an ear of corn..."

Damned iPhone
 

handle your whiskey 'Sock!
 

I would like to speed dunk red headed hotties boobala's in a vat of Irishcoffee, sprinkle them with a case of pixie stix, tie her to a fire ant hill & turn a phallanx of aardvark loose on her

then repeat on her fire box

both she & I would die of laughter
 

It took a while, but trying to work while visiting here is not easy. I figured it out: douche in Y fronts touching his nose is playing charades with someone behind the camera.

The word they are trying to guess is "douchebag" because it smells like poo...
 

Polka Dottie CockPerch in the back there looks like Fire Marshall Bill fucked Crucial's disco ball lamp
 

Hey when the fuck did they start the re-make of Fantasy Island?!?
I like how they've given Tattoo a little more zip to his character: they turned him into a pygmy-faced little monkey troll and adorned him with some Batman underoos and a skull-cap befitting a Special Olympian.
 

Caption:

the darksock family reunion.
 

This is a new attraction at Disney -
being molested by a crooked dicked
third rate gangster named Hymie, while his psychotic little brother Pigshnitz whiffs on his right index finger - the one he used to finger-fuck your best friend Gladys - who's so pale she makes Casper the friendly ghost look like one of the Ooopma Loompa's - and somehow, some way this keepsake photo which was supposed to be for your eyes only, makes it's way in the mail to your unsuspecting husband who, upon opening and seeing this photo, is going to beat your red-headed ass like a third world donkey and divorces you and kicks your skanky ass out on the street.


And Disney will only charge you $299.95 for this once-in-a-lifetime experience.
 

vindouchal FTW for the Fire Marshall Bill reference on the "special" fella in the back.

And the 'tard is wearing a RAINBOW POLKA DOT MANDANNA. That's a new level of douche-itude, imho. Whadda cock fag (to use the esteemed words of our friend, Donkey Douche).
 

Had to be a doggy pose didn't it. Something about an all white outfit that just screams douche bag though isnt there.
 

Nah, all white is what the ORDERLIES wear in the hospital.

On the other hand, I never saw an orderly dressed like white-bikini.
 

Colorful polka-dot mandana Snoutly has a very interesting aberration up in that crotch between his legs.

And while we know there is a rock wall and some green bush behind him, it would appear his little rocks are hanging out the black Y-front pull-on..

But then, the imagination is a fun thing.

Why is he even more interesting than the obvious spoofy action which is the Main Act?

I'm all opera'ed out for the evening.
 

Hey, despite the smell of poo here, and the heavy smell of everything on fire in greater LA, have you noticed how blessed we all are NOT to have Spur-ious Fan around this evening???

I think the villain in the opera must have done him in.

THAT, or he took his medication.
 

Ah, I see the late night west coast drinking crowd has arrived.

Let's riff shall we?
 

...or perhaps someone with PMS got to him. That would do it.

Cyclical douche terror.

Someone sent him some Midol.
 

I dunno, Vin, me so tired after singin' in that opera chorus. It wears down the balls in a way no woman can.

However, as we look at this photo, we are newly inspired to MOCK the mock-balling.

I say let's moth-ball the whole scene.
 

This Spurs Fan chap has placed himself, socially, in that crowd of backwards baseball cap wearing 40-ish guys that are reliving their glory days of nailing the easy chick in town ( the one with the floating eye) while hanging with their group of life long bro's that still live in either:

1)The "finished" 3rd car area of their parent' garage. You know the area with the crudely cut-through-the-wall air condition that reeks of stale cheap pot, Right Guard aerosol and sweaty laundry

2)A two bed room apartment, rent split 4 ways

3) A camping trailer with cracked, flat tires in GrandMaMa's back yard that he needed to move her collection of porcelain dolls to the garage carefully wrapped in old corsetts and 50's era wigs to fit his blow up matress in on the floor
 

Think I'm close there?
 

Perhaps this douchester ie merely her rag. My, but those appliances have really morphed in recent years.

That, or this is the biggest Depends pad I've ever seen on a hott's ass.

Where's Mr White when we REALLY need him??? Tarping away tonight???
 

Opera eh? Nice

I'm a frustrated country singer/songwriter
 

I'd guess so, Spur-ious Fan really needs a hard spur kick in the nuts.

And an education.

I always liked "Gee-hah, San Antone!" as an expression, and now he's ruined it for me.
 

Opera eh? Nice

I'm a cross dressing Salvation Army bell ringer, but usually when it's closer to Christmas time
 

Opera eh? Nice

I'm a sequins wearing piano player at the local gay karaoke club
 

Oh, everyone I know in the oepra chorus has wide musical tastes. We all sing the gamut. You'd be surprised what musicians like, and do. Most are pretty Heinz-57. Part of that is the humorous element in spoofing all sorts of musical styles.
Sorta like the varieties of douchebag styles.
 

Opera eh? Nice

I've conducted the neighborhood water glass ringers symphony's rendition of the overture in West Side Story
 

I love the live theatre.

When I was a wee Douchal my folks took us to first run plays .

Epics like "Man of la Macha ", "Hair", "Jesus Christ Superstar" and the like
 

You da gay-bag, douchal? How fun is THAT! I'm straight as a blown whistle, but the gay-boys are a riot.
 

More of a fag hag. I'm not into the life style but they's some entertaining fellers
 

I'd like test the flame combustion properties of that douche's white suit with a Campbell Hausfeld Oxy-Acetylene Torch
 

Opera eh? Nice

I played second triangle in the local PTA's Easter performance of Haydn's Stabat Mater
 

Well, opera is live theatre for sure, with a big orchestra thrown in. You had the good life growing up, obviously. You must have lived where the shows were available, ie LA, NYC, Chi-town.

The wife likes music too. We're both artists. Graphic variety. Music is but a sidecar.

Always admiring the graphic layout of these douchey photos DB1 puts out. There' some real balletic moves in some of them.

DB1, the Great Master indeed, knows that a picture is worth a thousand words. But we mock anyway, cuz' we're full of words.
 

Vin, youse a female? A fag-hag?
 

No, just an expression
 

There's something about these Vegas pools that's troubling for a real gambler.

When one goes to Vegas, it should be about gambling. It's something you can't do at home (Indian Casinos excepted)

My style is to rest up in the daytime, then pound the shit outta Crown Royal and play craps until the sun comes up.

Next is a huge breakfast that hopefully includes runny fried eggs, chicken fried steak and lots of white gravy.

This is followed by laying out at the pool with the i-Pod charged up as I wallow and melt in the 115 degree sunshine essentially removing the night's toxins readying for the next go round
 

I always liked any Stabat Mater, especially the brewed varieties. Like LaBatt's Blue Ribbon Mater.

Oops.

Time for another bottle.
 

But these fuckers have hijakced the pools now.

They've turned them into clubs.

Undulating crappy techno dance waves drone on as boisterous flesh hulks and their shrieking mistresses foul the air and airwaves making it hard for a guy to pass out.

"HEY man, I'm listening to PINK FLOYD here, turn it down!"

They'll kill it for us regular guys.

Or worse yet drive us to places like The Plaza or Sam's Town

Damn these douchebags
 

You sound like a farm-boy with that breakfast. We like our biscuits and sausage gravy around here, but the moderne wife likes to douche up the scrmabled eggs with shredded zukes and red onion and do it in frittata style. With cottage cheese.

Never been to Vegas, we gamble with the markets instead. And we'se both old enough to have sun damage to the skin.
 

And fuck me if they get out of the pool to pee. Guarantee they're using it for their own personal elimination needs
 

Vegas is a dalliance. I only go Super Bowl Weekend and a couple summer trips. It gets expensive if the dice aren't following orders.

At least the room and food are free if by free you mean lose a couple geezle's and we'll feed you
 

I can really appreciate the pool scenarios. Douchebags have infiltrated many things. Ruin it for everybody.

As for the casinos, we went to one near the San Francisco airport once, along the commuter train line. It was totally "infested" with Asians. Asians of all varieties, and the menus were in several languages, including Vietnamese, Korean, Thai, and who knows what else. We had no idea they loved to gamble so much, but then, it reminded me of that scene in The Deerhunter...
 

Uh, yeah, many a wee folk has used the pool to eliminate the liquid line, but when adults do it, cm'on.

I don't use pools nay more, lost the colon years ago to IBD and don't want to bother with extra waterproofing to the expensive adhesive flanges necessary to wear a secure appliance.

Hey, it was either that, or die.
 

SoCal indian casinos are a melting pot.

For people watching, the best time to go is around the first of the month. Old timers, welfare recipients and working hacks alike all just got paid and the forced camaraderie is comedy..

I'm off to the Samurai Scrote thread now. See ya
 

Where we live, I'm just used to seeing a different version of Asian, the educated university variety with more smarts than to gamble away all that cash. That, or the rich Japanese pared-down connoisseur.
 

Yikes! Just caught that colon thing @ 12:09 AM.

New respect over here.
 

@whoop-di-douche wrote:

As for the casinos, we went to one near the San Francisco airport once, along the commuter train line. It was totally "infested" with Asians.

I've been there. It's in San Bruno, CA. 660 san mateo avenue.

It's not "infested" with Asians. THEY LIVE THERE. Please understand: San Francisco has no "majority population" - IIRC, it's about 40% Euro, 5% African, and the rest is roughly divided between Asian (mostly Chinese) and Hispanic (mostly Mexican).

That particular neighbourhood in San Bruno is very mixed. There's an AWESOME middle eastern food store there, several sushi restaurants, several Chinese restaurants, and (when I was living in SF) an awesome mexican place that had a live mariachi band every friday night.

One of the Chinese places attracted Asian douchebags like mad, as it would serve dinner until 10 and then become a disco. They'd all pull up in their heavily modified Hondas, bleethy girls in tow.

One night, I think it was in 2006, I swear it was "be a complete asshole as understood by the representation of your dick by way of your car" night. It burned a hole in my retina.

The topper was this Massive Douchebag who drove up with his hair in a spikey blowout. His car was a Honda Prelude that had been lowered to have 3 cm ground clearance. It was painted metalflake green like a hotwheels toy. It had high intensity black lights set into the bottom of the car, so as it drove around, it glowed on a field of UV blue, and anything bleached or UV resistant would look like it was radioactive. My guess is that he was doing his part to sterilise the streets. It had the lowest profile tires I had ever seen on a car - I could only imagine it had a ride similar to that of a buckboard wagon. The headlights had been modified to be those nasty blueish things, and the taillights had covers on them to illuminate the silhouette of dragons. The exhaust was minimal and covered in chrome, and the sound system was deafening as it pumped window shaking gangsta rap into the delicate evening air.

I stood there laughing when he parked it and got out with his bleethy date. He was about 5'7", Asian, totally roided up with acne on his shoulders, hada browridge that any Neanderthal would have found attractive, and was wearing a wife beater T so you could see his dragon tatts. It's about 10.30 at night and he puts on his sunglasses as he leaves the car. I guess the yellow sodium lights of the parking lot were too bright. His hair, as noted, stood straight up. I don't reemmber his pants, but I do remember he wore HUGE white sneakers that had all the laces undone. How they stayed on his feet, I have no idea.

The bleeth? Skanky Asian bleeth in an lbd - nothing special.

I know that little strip WAY too well...

There used to be a store there of this guy - some old smelly hippie fuck - selling used books and LPs. Amazing vinyl collection. Most of it pretty scratched, but I picked up some GREAT stuff there. San Mateo Ave. Wow. sniff... "Memories...."
 

upon reflection, the siting was actually in 2003, not 2006.
 

if you guys get bored, this is pretty damn funny.

you will need a password to watch it, it's "cosmicdancer"
 

Fake red hair.
Fake boobs.
Fake O face.
Fake man doggie baggin'.



And Darksock hamming it up in the background.
 

The tourists observing the poo from the safety of the fence make me think this is some kind of Douche Zoo, where the Douches may be seen in their natural habitat without human interference.

Call this Dochebags in the Mist.
 

Hey, isn't that Haji from Jonny Quest?
 

these chicks are borderline hot, and the douches are boring.
 

Zodiac, that was a great commentary, can literally see your description. Night we wuz there wuz in late September of 2003, and we stayed at some motel near the airport and decided to wander around for something different to do before flying out the next day.
You're right, they have to be living there to have menus with that many differnt Asian languages on them, I'm just amazed at the variety! Had a friend who used to teach down there, too.
Me, I like the City and also Marin. And much further south to Stanford area and its enclaves. But passing through any place we like to explore and take in "local color."
As stated before, our "gambling casino" is the markets. Wife didn't like being in a casino at all, so we eventually left. Being the artists we both are, it was worth the experience.
 

Most members of the Pakistan national cricket team only know Janice by her nickname, "The Sticky Wicket."
 

The guy in the disco ball hat is probably one of those assholes that comes to a party with no friends, and then walks around awkwardly trying to butt into other peoples conversations. Minutes before this shot he was up on top of the hill next to those guys and said
"Big Gulps huh?..."
"..."
"Well OK, Seeya."

I wasn't there, these are just some of the things I know.
 

I'd still bet that disco ball hat is there with other people and is being a novelty act, or just a rabid photobomber.
 

"There's a reason they call me RUMPelstiltskin..." cackled the be-speedoed leprechaun as he disappeared up Alejandro's rectum.
 

I finally resolved the strange conflicting feeling I have been having about this pic.

I want to grudge fuck that redhead for some reason. I don't know why, as her skank factor is way outside the tolerances of what I normally find attractive, but I want to grab a handful of that matted mess she calls hair and rail her from behind with all the force an amateur martial artist like me can muster. There it is.
 

Holy SHIT BCS.

That is the funniest shit I've seen all year, and I'm only two minutes into it...
 

Gaijindouche wins sexiest comment of the year award as far as i'm concerned.

of course, it takes a unique type of hottie to drive that kind of ferocity from a man.

here's to the song FUCK ME LIKE YOU HATE ME.
 

Attention Ho in white bikini can earn her keep on all 4's. a grinder, a bumper, with a pre-moistened dumper.
 

What's with that Eurodouche behind them?
 

Who will fling poo first