Douchebags: If you can't beat 'em, shoot 'em.
 

Holding it at Rehab would've been to obvious, huh?

Congrats, DB1!
 

Douchebags: If you can't beat 'em, drown 'em.
 

@db1, i got a friend who does work for hulu, i can probably get the clip....
 

@ BCS -

I'm not surprised. "I got a friend that works at the Pentagon, he can give me the nukes code".

It may be a day late and a dollar short, but check out my epiphany in the Poppa Squat thread.
 

@db1

I don't have any friends, but I'll keep my eyes open for a clip.
 

Try this one, db1...

http://www.nbc.com/The_Tonight_Show_with_Jay_Leno/video/clips/elizabeth-banks-1031/806726/
 

I can't wait to hear Avram lay down some serious kazoo blues... I love that shit!
 

LMAO @ DarkSock's epiphany.....
 

Nice, thanks boobie mcgee!!
 

Does anybody have a copy of DB1's book I can borrow? I'm too cheap to buy it plus I don't want to pay for crap I read everyday for free, anway.


Uhhhhhhh, I mean "Congrats DB1!!"
Way to bring real literature back to the publishing world.

I'm sure the Nobel committee's interest has been piqued by the publishing of your tome.
And by 'piqued' I mean they attempted suicide.
 

Oh wait, that's the wrong part of the interview. Now I'm sad. And drunk. And sad.
 

Good work DB1, keep it up.
 

DB1, the NBC clip is her talking about her trapeze exploits, though I have to think you could go from there to get the desired clip.

I don't yet see how, though.
 

DB1

Gaming companies producing product for the douche demographic

http://www.comedy.com/embed/club-hero
 

seems like the reviewer guy has a thing for "hipsters"- like he's defending his own hipsterness. stupid hipsters.

I'm just surprised he read it at all- I've yet to actually read more than a scant few paragraphs at a time but I've sure as hell spent hours promoting it.

Pay no heed, DB1- so long as E Banks likes it...
 

So let me get this straight, Db1.

You were at the Bellagio signing in open range in the mecca of doucheousity?
 

congrats DB1!

and congrats to all of us too.

it's kind of hard to hear the noise of the douchebags over the sound of us being awesome.

kudos to the 'bags in the book who showed up as celebs, took it on the chin, and signed autographs.

douche on!
 

I did not attend the book party. I was nearly passed out drunk on my couch, watching The Young Ones on DVD.
 

Let the photo of the Dadabag signing his picture in the book be a lesson to all bags: Have a sense of humor, you fuckwits.
 

so which dbag is suing your publisher?

http://www.courthousenews.com/2008/11/18/In_Libel_Suit_Against_Simon_&_Schuster_Man_Insists_He_Is_Not_A_Douchebag.htm

Name and shame him! I want to know how big a douche this guy is!
 

Congrats DB1!

Don't worry about the Onion. They're only 1% funny. That's why, like Plinkey, I won't buy what I read for free.

*Holds up empty glass*
Here's to cheap bastards!
 

sorry, here's the link to that lawsuit
 

Sadly, none of us will ever be as awesome as the Z-Boy in Pfah's avatar.
 

Next up on DB1's list - a children's book:

Little Suzy bleeth and Joey P-nut, the fat-assed Jersey douchebag, go on a cross country trip to Vegas in their grandmother's stolen 1975 Ford Pinto. Along the way they encounter other young bleeths and douchebags who join them in the fun, frivolity and wonderment only experienced by youth.

The climax of the story is when young Suzy bleeth squirts out a baby in middle of the Las Vegas strip and all the little douche-boys give a hearty "Cheers" with their red plastic cups to the lucky dad.

You'll enjoy this heartwarming story of the experiences of youth and overcoming obstacles and to never give up your dreams of being a douchebag.
 

@crucial head...Z-boy was a badass, but i've always held a special place in my hero-list for Lance Mountain.
 

Oops! Sorry, Plinky. I put a useless British E in your name before. I have one IRL, so it happens from time to time.

*Holds up URC*
Cheers!
 

The Search for Animal Chin was the greatest skateboard movie every, for all time, and everest...
 

*ever
 

@clementine

good on ya and i understand. i personally have more typo's in my threads than a teenage boy in jenna jamison's live chat room.
 

@crucial head...agreed. however, Girl Skateboard's Yeah Right DVD is pretty incredible as well. the soundtrack is fantastic and the sessions are rad.




yeah, i just used the word 'rad'.
 

I'm just curious about the high number of trannys at this party...I know you weren't actually THERE DB1, but did you have final say on the guest list?
 

Wow. Rad. That's gnarley!

Damne! Did it againe!
 

@Pfah,

I'm going to name my next child Bones Brigade whether it's a boy or a girl.






Time for a new pic DB1!
 

i like turtles
 

@sock-
your epiphany is the funniest/scariest thing i've ever seen. But are you sure thats not batboy?
 

@ douchelexic

wow a batboy reference. awesome!
 

Go with the insider at Hulu if you can.

As I said with the link when it first came up, NBC only keeps those things up for like 2 weeks, or something, so download 'em.

This Guy has a good start on how.

The Tonight Show directory structure seems to go like this:
http://www.nbc.com/The_Tonight_Show_with_Jay_Leno/video/episodes/?vid=123456
and
http://www.nbc.com/The_Tonight_Show_with_Jay_Leno/video/categories/season-17/35905/

The vid code of the Elizabeth Banks episode, I believe is: 806726.

Good Luck deciphering their episode numbering scheme, though.

Tried entering that # directly, but no dice.

That's all my limited Kung Fu can do right now.

Maybe Tian has the new directory structure figured out with suffix like .asx or .flv.

(maybe they actually pulled the vid off the server instead of the link?)

Oh well; cheers.
 

Hey DB1

How 'bout a heads up next time?

Maybe a hunter would like to pop in and check out the scene.....

Especially if you're going to be in SoCal sometime soon,...
 

And, more importantly, was a Bleeth or two impressed with your work and offering her snuggly goodies ending up in a "Stays In Vegas" situation ?
 

How did these toaster crumbs warrant two photos in the Las Vegas Weekly?
 

"In related news, "Area Man" does something that signifies a small, sad existence, but it's funny in headline form because newspapers don't normally report on the banal. So it's funny. For ten years straight."

WIN.

Will I ever get tired of looking at hotts and making fun of people? I think not.
 

@db1

Sorry, man... I saw the beginning of it and thought 'this must be it'.

Damn.

I'll crawl back into my hole now. Keep up the good work.
 

Youtube link for Elizabeth Banks.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nfv06XHjeQ
 

of course, I leave Vegas and I'm back in NYC fighting with New Jersey douche while this is happening.
 

So which Douches showed up to sign?
 

@Hoopo, 10:27 a.m. -

Thank you! That's so cool! (First comment there, too.)
 

Wow, Elizabeth Banks is awesome! She has such a great personality, smart, funny, great story teller, and she was mocking douchebags on national tv. I think I'm in love. *drool*

thanks for the link Hoopo
 

Better yet is the Elizabeth Banks Underwear Scene


RRrrr!!!
 

@ crocodile douchee 7:51
BWAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!!! New category for the Douchies: Best Douchebag-Inspired Product.

Ironic that they chose The Belaggio for the party, is it not? The hotel was inspired by the majesty of Italian art and architecture. What it actually is is a feeding trough for fat, midwestern goobers with all the culture of a sewer grate. They can come and preen and pose in front of the fountain whose water output in one day would irrigate Ethiopia and stave off the deaths of little children. **But it's so pretty!!!!** Then they can ride a fake gondola on a fake waterway, piloted by a guy named Earl who's from Tulsa. Later they can gawk at ugly Fendi bags that they can't afford anyway and then dry-hump themselves silly in an awful replica of a Eurotrash nightclub.

And I say this having never actually set foot in the Bellagio, I could smell the poo from the street. And I smell the irony now. Good on ya, DB1, glad to see you and your bloated liver getting recognized for your tireless work.
 

I live in Vegas and I find it funny how those who attended the launch party were the very ones this site is all about. This place is a cesspool of of these clowns. Granted, if vegas wasn't such a douchebag attraction, this site would have less pictures to make fun of. It works out for our entertainment.
 

Bellagio is mecca to the Eurobags that invade the city. Similar to the doucebags that hang out at the Hard Rock, but the Eurobags have more money and expensive clothes. However, they smell worse.
 

@ vin douchal

Thank U for that. Wish I had seen this thread 20 minutes earlier when I was cleaning my pipe ... errrrr, nevermind.
 

The dweebs at The Onion have been rockin' the same three jokes for years now. The Obama administration is going to kill them - they can't make fun of one of their own. Fuck'em.
 

I would lick Elizabeth Banks' bung... if she kept her shoes on. How can someone that hot have such ugly feet?
 

The Onion aspires to be The Daily Show in print.
Not a bad concept, mind you, but your jokes gotta stay razor sharp if you're gonna ask sarcastic morons to remain loyal.

Hence the birth of hotchickswithdouchebags.com.
 

I've been regularly viewing this site for a couple years now. Despite what some other geeky critics may say, this hasn't worn thin over time for me. Always a laugh. Thank you. :)
 

Heres the problem of the onion article.

They missed the point of the site.

They don't get it. Unless you spend a couple of days on here you won't get it.

1) those most likely to call out and mock so-called douchebags most likely have a whiff of doucheness themselves.

Likely? Yeah. Thats why DB1 named himself DB1. Read the FAQ.

2} Though the questionable classification of "hot chick" seems mainly based on cup size and lack of clothing

Either a dude with no sex drive wrote that. Or a girl who doesnt like the site. We have hotts from all creed, color, cup sizes, and promiscuity here. Questionable my ass. If your cahones work then there is no question. Just a huge growth. Automatic for the people. Not to forget all the delicious library hotts. Makes me want to quit work, go back to to engineering school, and do their homework while they get coffee with their ex boyfriends.

3)which flogs the joke to death with a lengthy classification of douche-types

Yah. Thats what happens here. We define douches and what they are, then mock. And the chicks. Well one thing this site promotes is the idea that normal girls out in your local neighborhood are super attractive and not just found in magazines and movies.

4)whom these supposed objects of desire cling are unquestionably worthy of mockery—even if the term "douchebag" is as overused and nebulous as "hipster."

Nebulous? Really. I thought there were lengthy classifications. Or did you miss the point of the site?


I think the author that wrote that snippet needs to incorporate at least some humor into their critique. Instead of sounding like a crotchety old lady. That's what we do. And we don't even get paid for it.
 

@ low-key

A-fucking-men. Chances are if you have 100 or so bloggers and at least one-third of them have a smidge of humor then this site will carry on forever.

Hell, Hollywood survives and look at the shit they re-hash all the time!!

Was it Ecclesiastes who said (paraphrasing) there's nothing new under the sun, that it's all been said and done already?

As long as we keep the presentation fresh this place will roll on.
 

@Plinky:

I know that verse! It was in the book of Exidouche or Lamindouchions.


... or maybe it was the Pissalms... Mr. White would know.
 

I love how you're a coffee person too db1
Yes, that's it - coffee over red bull any day
 

Since when does DB1 refer to himself as "The DB1?"
 

the avclub writers aren't the same writers who write the parody articles from the onion.
 

Great news and I promise to buy the book!

And even better: The Onion put it ahead of that unfunny PoS by ShitDouche Fucker Max.
 

Sorry folks, but only douchebags drink Red Bull or any of those "power" drinks.
 

Uuh...DB1? Where was this party and these hot chicks at the fkkn Hollywood signing?? Fakkssake....

Now I'm straight bitter n Thanksgiving is ruint.