Oh, God, Anon. I weep for you. Never have I felt such pathos, lived someone else's misery so excruciatingly. I pray for your tortured soul and hope you win for best Anonymous Bag Hunter.
 

If I ask nicely, and in honor of her win, maybe Hamster Hott will return that other testicle? I really liked the matched set.
 

Whoa. Someone get that guy some help...
 

I died a little inside reading this..
Pray for the Anonymous martyr who brought us this epic tale.
 

@medusa

I was just about to chime in that anon should get some kind of douchie for sharing that.

Although can she really be a 9.5 if she financially rapes you on a date? I gotta say that knocks a couple of points off the hotness scale.
 

http://publicanonymous.blogspot.com/
 

been there anon. i feel your pain. except for the part about feeling guilty banging less than an 8.5. no shame in banging five 2's instead of one ten my friend. thats what alcohol, dim lighting and fat chicks are for. i miss college.
 

Cool Hand Douche -

Two 5's make a 10.... Right?
 

Or 10 1's, if you've got the stamina.
 

It's enough to turn a man broke back
 

nice story, anon. i was moaning while reading it....
 

Yea, yea, anon, you can take the girl outta the trailer park....but then, what's the point?
 

@ Mr. White

If you count personality as part of the hottness, then absolutely, a fiscal date-raping and haughtiness knocks some serious points off. If you're going on looks alone, then even the shittiest attitude affects not the hottness.

However, and I hope all you 'bag boys out there don't take offense, it's usually more a question of looks, as revealed in Anon's tale of woe here. He just couldn't be happy with 8.5s after that...even if they just liked to go bowling and then fuck like a banshee afterwards, not caring if/that it was a studio apartment.
 

Sorry for not mentioning this before. I'm the Anon featured above and this is my new blog not just about trangressive behavior, but about the power of anonymity:

http://publicanonymous.blogspot.com/

I posted above probably should have given a little story.

Anonymous Public
 

@tag 'em and mike

two 5's, ten 1's, four 2.5's, it doesn't matter. as long as she isn't sporting a huge pork sword like the chick in the still life pic, i think we're all good!
 

I prefer 3.333333 3s. But that's just me.
 

@anon 11:09

No offense, but nice try with the whole guerrilla marketing, hey look at me, I'm doing something here, look look look, view my blog, view my blog...yea well I'm not gonna look at it. Fuck you. Fuck you for trying to push your anon crack on me.
 

...next you'll be selling anon t-shirts...../puke
 

You poor bastard.
 

@ Jean Claude-

I'm only trying here cuz i imagine you might like it, similar interests, etc. I dont know any other way to do it. If you did it to me, i'd be ok with it.

and your response to me pretty much guarantees we have similar attitudes.

Anonymous Public
 

... & I thought my Weinershnitzel ordeal was a downer
 

That story reminds me of why I put a ring on my self assured, smart and beautiful wife's finger.
I was that anon too many times in my teens and twenties.

Thanks anon. That was painful. Now I shall retire to the cantina and toast my memories.

Starting at Heidi all the way up to Nicole.
 

You put a quarter in this chick's mouth, pull her right arm, and a condom pops out of her vajheen.

- - - -

I don't read stories or posts made by anons. If you're not clever enough to create an avatar nor brave enough to make up and hide behind a fictitious name/identity, then your mental dribble isn't worth my time.


And darksock's mom is so fat she has to pay the extra $30 to check in her left arm on an airplane.
 

Wow, that's harsh man. Anon you get a prize, and I think a pass on a few future douchey moves. I'd be pretty pissed too if that happened to me.

But on the other hand, -that- type of behavior is EXACTLY why we have bleeths. Cause they get all this shit, for putting out a little ass and looking hot and no one gives them shit about how much it costs even if they only offer hotness. I cannot say in good conscious that a girl who bleeds you dry on dates has a winning personality. From the time I was old enough to know what a bill was in my house I knew about our debt problems and our household expenses. That gives you a little more to think about on a date. Like trying not to break your date's wallet.

What did I get for my first date? The date that I went out and bought an brand new outfit shoes, did my hair and even put on fucking makeup? I got taken to a movie and I think to a plate lunch place (think $6.00 for a take out plate of food, half of which is white rice)for dinner. Yeah, I'm TOTALLY doing this wrong. I guess that's as good as it gets though for being a tier two or three.
 

@anon pub

...heh, I was joking, but I'm not sure if we have the same interests...I like long walks on the beach, barefoot, dragging a whale carcass behind me. Flamethrower lit dinners, of dolphin and fried pubic lice. And I prefer filthy ginches who glue hairballs to their pits to brown toasted hourglass needy broads who don't put out.
 

I DO have a name, it literally is Anonymous Public and am a regular on the site.
 

@ Jean-

I might have been wrong. you seem like a nicer person than I am
 

Plinky wrote:

I don't read stories or posts made by anons. If you're not clever enough to create an avatar nor brave enough to make up and hide behind a fictitious name/identity, then your mental dribble isn't worth my time.


I do read it, but I don't put much weight or interest in it, and I rarely respond to anons.

I agree. Getting an avatar together is easy and fun and I don't see what the problem is, other than laziness.

All I did was think back to my childhood and all those creepy puppet shows, and then I met the Blue Fairy, and she turned me into one.

And now I have a woody 24/7.

So, suck on my little mahogany tourdes, anon.
 

Well if you want to, you can read it, I happened to purposely choose the name and theme of anonymity as it's interesting see how much anonymous shit occurs online. if you dont like it, fine, but i thought i'd offer it to my fellow HCwDB fans as a regular. i KNOW all of you already.
 

it's so cold here that I'm gonna go pee on my hands!
 

anonP,
no worries man. I already signed up to follow your post... anonymously of course.

And yeah, ugly chicks wear big glasses to cover their ugly mugs.

personally, I'm just too lazy to log into the blogger thing to have an avatar
 

I usually go to most links cuz i'm a media whore or cuz i figure, if someone here likes it, i prolly will and I dont know about that Anonymous blog. It seems like a rip-off of Bret Easton Ellis and Chuck Palaunchuck (spelling?) but i guess i could read it if i'm bored.

Army of Douche-ness
 

being an internet geek, there is only one Anonymous in my world, and they do funny and splendid things.
 

@ Troy Tempest

Only us brave people put ourselves out there with our screen names.

YOU ANONS ARE COWARDS!!


he he he. Isn't the internet great?

My name is Todd and I live in shit-sandwich ... uhhhhhh, I mean Northeast Ohio. I like making fun of 'the system' and good 'ole burgeois America. And celebrities. And stupid people. And idiots. And men and women. And most near-extinct animals. And television. And the radio. And fashion. And foreigners. And our government. And fat moms. And abortion. And religion - ALL of them. And art. And movies. And rich people. And LA and Hollywood. And the French. And the Brits. And just about every country on the planet. And Antarctica. And douchebags. And bleeths. And science. And math. And heterosexuals. And homosexuals. And a-sexuals (darksock). And virgins. And colors. And light. And darkness. And pfah. And fictitious characters and creatures. And Randy @ Chicago's b96.5 said .... And on and on and on and on and ...
 

@ Plinky,

I'm from Cleveland too.
Where do you hang out?

Army of DOuche-ness
 

@Army of DOuche-ness

Right now I hang mostly in the Croatian Nation/Willoughby area.

I really don't go out all that much since getting imprisoned ... errrr, married, and since buying a house. But I'm always looking for fellow klunkheads to hang out with and feed my inebriation.

Have your people call my people.
 

@ ash

Hey, don't knock tier 2 and 3, it's a good place to be, trust me. Every now and then I feel a pang that I never made it to tier 1 when I see one strutting down the street,the picture of perfection. But if that means hanging out with douches, being wanted solely for pussy and bragging rights and being a total cuntbag to the rest of humanity, I'll be happy to stay where I'm at.

Besides, all the guys who are tier-1 have no brains, small dicks, little imagination and nothing to offer but looks and money. There are exceptions, of course. But Tier 2 guys overall are a better choice. They have to work a little harder on the presentation, 'cause it's not as pretty as tier 1, it has to be more solid and amusing.

You're in the right place, Ash. Your biting wit would be wasted on tier-1 guys, they wouldn't get it and they'd be threatened by it. You and I shall rock tier 2 and our conquests will be the stuff of legends!

Mr. White to the basement, STAT!
 

Plinky, you need to cut some folks some slack. Like me. I don't even know HOW to post an avatar, but since the comments here are what matter, I just go about doing my commentary. At least I have an ID or handle or whatever, and celebratory at that, Whoop-di-doo!
 

@ Whoop-di-douche

I was being facetious about the avatars and screen names. We're all "anonymous" for the most part.

I was being ironic, too, making fun of the anons for being 'anonymous' when I, myself, am anonymous as a real dude.


It's all good. It's all about the good times here, brah.

As for affixing an avatar: go to a website or a search engine - like google or yahoo images - and find a picture you like. Save it in "my photos" or another file on your computer.
When you go to e-blogger "edit" your profile. Scroll down to the section where you can upload your picture and hit "browse." It should bring you to your computer's directory so that you can click on the file and then the picture. Click "ok" then "save."

There might be an easier way to do this but this in-and-of-itself is pretty easy.

If what I told you doesn't work then reach out to pfah or bcs.
 

I'm anonymous as a social concept, based on all the previous anon's that came before me.

oh, and BSC, i know Anonymous the group as well.
 

rather, BCS
 

Excellent post anon. Your self observing ego will be an endless source of torment and insight for weeks to come.


@ash definitely try and negotiate where you are going before you seal the deal. I know i've had a much easier time choosing places when I knew that a bar wasnt the only place the girl wanted to go. I mean you are probably a veteran and know this stuff anyway but I figured I would throw it out there. I have blown a good amount of cash but those experiences I remembered for a good while. I dated this girl last year and took her to I knew this place that played turkish music, went down to a festival about 2 hours out that had a small band we liked, ate at place that had Nepalese food. Of course a few months later I lost my job and was dirt poor but felt good about most of the money i spent. The cash value doesnt matter as much (unless you are strapped for cash at the time) so long as you arent sitting in a bar wasting yourself away and instead using it to enrich yourself and being exposed to stimulating things. Hell, if you get good at it alot of the time you can join a community and not have to worry about the $$, cause the people in the community dont mind sharing food , conversation, or music with you. Substituting a hole in the wall with culture for places with status where rich people frolic is something I people do more of.

On the other hand taking a person out all the time cant substitute for your own personality. You could take someone around the world , if you don't connect on a personal level then it could be boring for both of you.
 

And now if she checks back in, she's going to be pissed and ask for takedowns of all her photos (even though it's just this one, I think).

Better save 'em if you haven't already done so, fellas.....
 

Also, Hamster Hott seemed pretty cool when she wrote into HCwDB. Check it out.
 

part of me feels, "whew, at least i'm still a virgin and haven't gone on such wasteful cash binges before."

and part of me wants to tell Anon, "hey you i'm still a virgin. what the hell are YOU complaining about?!"

but yes, if i saw that post i would raise Anon a toast in honor of his sacrifices.

and what the fuck is "expensive" water people? like sparkling flavored water? caviar-flavored to make it more expensive? i'm too Neanderthal for this shit.
 

Steve, "expensive" water is the bottled liquid served in restaurants fancier than Quiznos. That's why you've never had it. Dare to dream, Steve! Dare to dream!
 

and it doesn't sound like i would want to have it either. have fun with expensive water Anon Public. i know i wouldn't.
 

@Medusa

You're right, tier 2 and 3 isn't that bad, just frustrating sometimes. I guess being a tier 1 princess wouldn't be fun anyways. Everyone expecting you to either be prim and proper or a slut and to have a head full of air. Oh well, too bad for them. Those girls are gonna have to ratchet it up a few notches if they want to keep up with us I think. I have yet to see tier 1 pen erotica, or have a pron collection in the first place. Too bad for them, more latex for us! I'm going to have to send you this little story I'm writing when I get done with it to see what you think.

On a semi-related note: I've got more Bianca pictures up. Even found some Christmas ones! They're awesome.
 

@ Ash

What? WHAT? I can't hear you! My vibrator is too loud!


Thanks for the piccies. Aside from burning up 3 AAA batteries, I am the hero of the workplace, I shared the pics and created a sea of IOBs.
 

@Medusa

Sweet! I'm so sad, my rabbit broke the other day!!!! And I can't find a decent replacement. Seriously, I about cried when I couldn't get it to turn on. Damnit Hawaii, WHY MUST SHIPPING BE SO EXPENSIVE!
 

I've always loved me some Bianca. And female convo's about vibrators (attractiveness pending).
Not so much the seas of IOBs.
 

@ ash

The rabbit, I find, is quite breakable. I'm a fan of the eager beaver, a lil' sturdier. It's those one with the beads and the pearls, that's what gets all fucked up.

I think we're abusing this forum.
 

Wow anon. Wow.

Brilliant!
 

On a tangentially related note, I just covered the topic on bitchy suburban mothers, Hamster Hotts in a few years:

http://publicanonymous.blogspot.com/2008/12/mothers-use-bullshit-scare-tactics.html
 

@medusa

Whenever there's a need, I'm in the basement. No worries.
 

Anon, that's what you get for dating women who think of themselves as something you have to "afford", while offering nothing substantial in return (unless you count "trophy" fuck and headache as substantial). Stop wasting money on them and you might afford a better car. 'Cause there are actually women out there who will take you out, are not impressed by your money, but by your wit and substance, plus a bunch of subtle shit, and are hott to boot.

P. S. If anybody actually meets one, let me know.
 

@ Ashfish and Medusa

As a man I am thoroughly concerned about the woman's plight with cheap and ineffective self-pleasure devices. So, if sharing your experiences and feelings with such a broad audience helps then by all means please SHARE!

And if you'd like to include pictures I think it will be most benenficial to me in understanding the depths of your struggles as strong women.
 

This kind of story can only come from a member of the 30K millionaire club. Spending the money you dont have to impress a girl only makes you more of a douche dude. Congrats on all of your obvious acclomplishments. I suggest that in the future you stop going to places you cannot afford and definitely stop trying to bump yourself to the upper class, you stick out like a sore thumb.
 

Of course she drives a better car than you, anonymous. That's because sniveling, crawling idiots like yourself cover half of her expenses in an attempt to impress her. All she has to do is look hot and occasionally (if you've drained your wallet heavily enough), give some. And when she gets bored with you, she moves to another semi well-off idiot willing to cough up the dough while crying inside, leaving you to yell out her name and write posts like these, oblivious to just how pathetic you sound.

If there were no men like you, there would be no women like her, as there would be no one to supply the demand. But as it stands, it is a self-perpetuating cycle, a downwards spiral. And it leads straight back to the Victorian Era.

That's progress for you.
 

i would really perfer you to not consider this a personal attack, but for all intensive purposes, IT IS!
PLEASE REMOVE WHATEVER IT IS YOU LEFT GROWING ON YOUR FACE
your cheap suit isnt impressing anyone, and your ability to get a table/bottle further perpetuates your infinite ability to contract a viral disease OR NEVER GET ANY.... EEEVER.
please keep your disgusting facial whatever and your herpes far far away from me, not that i would give you a second of my time if i ever did see you.
Buuuuuut if you were to eventually recieve some fellatio that you think is even worth mentioning to your friends, stop f*cking popping your collar
your not of worth
get over yourself
and shave your face correctly you waste of matter
 

If she rates above 8 my scrotum with lipstick and fake sunnies would rate at least 5!
She is very ordinary and if she tried that shit on me I'd go to the bathroom then leave without telling her.
You blokes need to do some research and see what a real hottie looks like. Take your dick out of your hand, put on some pants, and head for a beach. But don't forget your asthma spray.