That's Malibu, not Goose brah!
 

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I'm not sure that's a bottle of Goose... looks more like Malbu to me. Notice how he's cleverly held the bottle so that the logo is facing him, thinking he can pull one over our heads. Well, nice try you fucking pussy.

And chicks pulling off the cunt-finger-spilt-tongue maneuver = always classy.

In non-douchey news, Happy ID to all my American friends. Cheers ;-)
 

Actually, Bucky's got that wonderful, beaten-to-death Gangsta tattoo cliche' "Only God Can Judge Me."

God's looking, Bucky. And he says you're about two inches.
 

What a party! Chicken! Pasta! And crabs!
 

How fitting that this picture was taken at the "Crab Shack".

Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche
 

And since you're asking, DB1, I'm making an apple pie today, 'cause there is nothing more American than Apple Pie on the 4th of July. Tomorrow it's a big BBQ, Laundry Gimp is gonna get a set of grill marks on his ass. And Mr. White is gonna make a few pints of his special brew for the neighbors before he eats the apple pie while I stand barefoot in it.

You know, the usual stuff.
 

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@ Anon 10:09

Great minds think alike. Please come to our barbecue.
 

Seaside Crab House...As in Seaside Heights, NJ? As in "Guido Beach?"
 

Yup, that's the same canopy.
 

What I SHOULD be doing is Kathy Hott, bending her over just like in the photo. But the g/f would emasculate me. So I guess I won't.
:(
 

BTW if anyone goes to the above link and wants to look at the boardwalk cam, it's UN: seaside PW: crabhouse
 

Maybe his tatt says "Only God Can Douche" - having a higher power's authority helps validate it for those "made in his image," ya know.

Or maybe it's "Only Tod Can Do Me." Yeah, only one 'd' in Tod. "Trust-Fund Tod." He has the goatee/Van Douche.

Fuck you, Tod.
 

@ Massengill 10:18

I took your suggestion and looked at the Boardwdalk Cam. That's the last time I take any suggestions from you. Asshole. Now you owe me a new monitor. And a new face.
 

My 4th plans ? BEER, and too much of it !
 

I will be driving up to Illinois to visit family tomorrow, then returning Sunday afternoon/evening.
 

RE: only god can judge(me)

i like telling purveyors of this nascent wisdom that it may be true that some celestial being may be the ultimate arbitrator, there is an allowance however for persons such as myself to file amicus briefs from time to time as we see fit and as the case warrants.

of course i don't say it exactly like that...

i am wondering about the bandage on white bandana, specifically that she she seems to be advertising a recent depro shot. i suppose whatever it takes, seems a little pointed. if she is tounging the tang as the fingers indicate. is her bud light friend swirling around the rim? scary when "teacher teacher i have to tinkle" is the classiest of the female poses.

bucky sure looks shorter outdoors his friends sadly are mere baglings. oh to be young enough to take pride in one's ability to merely possess alcohol publically
 

@ Wheeze

Illinois? My deepest sympathies. If you're anywhere near the central portion stop in and have some of Mr. White's homebrew.
 

Heh heh, Medusa - no, actually it's more northeasterly. "Da Bears" have training camp there now.
 

I'd plant it so far inside Kathy Hott that her grandkids will be born with dented skulls.
 

Wow. Seaside Heights, NJ. Who would've thought it?
 

The great thing about living in the redneck/latino area of the I.E. is that the big California Speedway is down the street. They throw a great bash on July 4th.

They have great food, a good concert schedule with Jimmy Wayne, a fairly decent country pop star , and Taylor Hicks , more towards my old lady's taste, rounded out by a parade, a motorcycle show and half nekkid ladies.

Of course 50-75% of the half nekkid ladies will have beer guts to make Dennis Franz jealous, but the remaining 25% may be worth the price of the discounted tickets.

Their fireworks rival anything I've seen at Disneyland or Angel's Stadium.

Then the demolition derby starts as the cars filled with meth heads coming down and drunken illegal aliens pile towards the exits. Fun stuff. Pull up some lawn chairs and watch the cops on Segways write tickets that get tossed out the window before the ink is dried.


Of course my family will be the freaks there since:

a) we have all our teeth, well, most of them
b) our vehicle doesn't have a confederate flag on it
c) our vehicle doesn't have a "The Virgin of Guadalupe" transfer on the back window
d) we'll be wearing shoes
e) we speak english
f) we're under 350 pounds
 

EVERYWHERE these young leaders of tomorrow end up is a Crab House.

The Seaside Crab House: It's Always Low Tide Here.™
 

@ wheeze

Ewwwww Lake Forest. Ha ha. Sorry 'bout your luck.
 

On this 4th of July, I'd like you all to remember that Lady Liberty has a surprisingly hot bod. Only a matter of time before some other Axe-reeking statue tries to doggy-bag her.
 

Hot Chicks with Mad Guitar Skills

Katrina Johansson
 

His belly tatt reads "Inflate to 36 pounds."
 

And remember: If you're not down with Prep H, you can buy the douchebag equivalent of a sports bra.

Yeah, I'm not trying to steal the boss's thunder with my own Friday links here, but I keep finding all kinds of HCwDB-related shit this morning.
 

This picture is almost too much for words. Almost.
Wait actually it is. For a minute there i thought i could sum up the enormity and variety of its douchal multitude in a few succint and possibly pithy phrases, such as, "Poolside at the Crab House, crabs caught live everyday . . . from the pool behind you . . . and served on a steaming hot platter of chicken paste",
but then the composition's magnitude overwhelmed my senses and rallied to defy categorization or even intellegibility by sentient creatures.
The work is strong, almost as if the scrotal excretions involved in the 'baggery were unconsciously participating in a spectral art installation on the Jerz sho, a meditation on the not-to-be-explored grundle of vacuous culture syndrome also known as stereo-typical-douchery (STD).
Impressive use of mixed media on an utterly emotionally-depraved canvas.
-Le Douche
 

@vin

I mostly play through a Fender Princeton Twin, not Marshall. Do you think...um...that she'd...like me anyway?
 

Bucky celebrates his recent diploma of douchewankery by mimicking Bra!Broheim! at his poolside graduation party...
Kathy and Kayla celebrate by wearing two bras while making "Broheim" hand signals.

Big Bro Heimy stands attentively to the right, taking it all in.
 

I play thru a Crate 2x12 combo. Hell, it was cheap and it's louder than a drunk red-headed divorcee locked out of her own trailer.
 

vin:

yeah, she shreds, but her music is formulaic and at its core, not that interesting.

Now if you want a hot chick who can shred AND play something new and interesting, try two minutes and 23 with Marnie Stern who shreds and sings at the same time. Also, Marnie's drummer is Zach Hill from HELLA, and he's fucking amazing.

And this is another of her videos that is pretty funny to watch but the song fucking shreds and is completely manic.

And this is one of my ,fave songs by her. It isn't as manic or shreddy as the others - it's just tough as nails.

Marnie Stern - great guitarist, creative, totally original, and (tsssst OW!) Hott. A future ex-Mrs Tempest.
 

And another young woman with totally amazing chops is Kaki King. She's isn't as overtly hotttt as Marnie Stern, (she's got the stupid lip ring thing going) but her technique is amazing.
 

@darksock

Back in my younger days, my first real amp was a Crate with an EV speaker. I think I caused structural damage in more than one high school gym with that fucker.

@Troy

I dig the Marnie vid, although I have to be honest: Every time I hear somebody wanking on that right-hand tapping shit, I want to drag Eddie Van Halen's near-corpse behind my car for a mile or two. Never has a technique that could have been mildly interesting (at best) as a flourish or ornament been so overused and abused. It's like a flamenco guitarist playing nothing but rasguedos and tremolo, i.e., boring as shit.
 

SHUCKY: Hey, bro! What's goin' down this weekend!

BUCKY: Crab House Pool Party at the Shilo Inn, bra! It's gonna be off da hook!

SHUCKY: Hell yaaah, bro! Fuck Vegas! We da real Rehab, dawg!
 

@Medusa

Sorry that I won't be able to make it. I live way down south (SC) where the IQ's are in the single digits and just about everyone under the age of 18 has 4 children.

Have some slices of the pie for me and have Mr. White pour a 40 and the sidewalk for me.

Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche
 

@ Troy, nice links. Marnie Stern is the hottest of the gals but that voice just made the corners of my Chet Atkins poster curl up.

That Kaki King video is like Stanley Jordan with acrylic nails. Very innovative.


@ youse guys

I stick to the basics, Les Paul through the Marshall or Strat through a 1964 Vibro Champ.

My kick assest guitar is a 1971 Gibson EB-3 bass in ashwood. They only made 12 that year. It's worth a Douche's ransom in bail money/URC fund/bottle service at the club

P.S. Kaki King is cute with the Librarian Hott look
 

I would use my dick to straighten out Kathy's tongue.
 

I'm going to a big party with boating and water skiing on Lake Winnepasaukee, maybe I'll see ya, DB1.
 

Shot to the scrote
and they're to blame
they give Jerz, a bad name!

-Douche Bauer
 

Instead of the Hefty Cinch Sak pants, Bucky is wearing the 8 gallon Waste Can Liner Shorts. He is not holding a URC, but a rather plain Coke cup. Which then one can infer that he is drinking mostly rum with some coke and will fry his brain in the hot sun, since the magical hat cannot rotate its shield harmonics like Picard tried to do against the Borg and keep the harmful rays of the sun from striking his exposed dome.

Is that Nottabucky with the floating white hat in the background getting ready to snipe like Lee Harvey Oswald at the Book Depository?

-Douche Bauer
 

I'm going to a bohemian art gallery's 20th birthday party in Sydney:

http://www.tapgallery.org.au/exhibitions.html

except this art gallery puts on burlesque strippers for some reason, known coyly as 'visual performing arts'. and free wine. and available women. and probably even song.

ha-hah. and 4th july doesn't even mean anything in oz...

P.S. that crabshack pic is horrifying. what are those young ladies thinking making those strange tongue gestures -- i might ask someone at the art gallery tonite, they'll know...
 

I just feel sorry for the multi-residential dwellers forced to live next door to the Crabshack...
 

I went to school with a Bucky...Bucky D.
He played soccer; also, he lettered in playing "hide the sausage" with his best "friend" Aaron.
He had big chipmunk cheeks and teth to match, He was about 5 foot 6 or 5'7'' ad had bad breath. He ended up marrying this plow horse named Carrie T. She can out bench him, I'm sure of it. He has two kids now. He and Aaron turned on me because I caught them in full anal penetration, pants around ankles, lips on lips, Aaron fingering his butt while he plowed James out on the river where we used to go fishing. He was Aaron's biggest fanboy. So they decided they had to destroy me, lest anybody find out they were gaytards. I had to be destroyed. They sunk all day every day into trying to make my life miserable, turning everybody against me, all because I caught them being gay homosexuals and didn't ask t join in on their sick butt play. Bucky D., wherever you are, I hope you die, you dyslexic turdball. You secret fag. Dude still cruises public bathrooms from what I hear. Bucky and Carrie--she could very well have a dick herself.
 

Nothing like washing down crabs and dingleberries with Malibu rum and pineapple juice.
 

running with the malibu hahah
 

wow bucky. you get pretty lame by the minute.
 

what truly surprises me is the pink shirt hott sandwiched by Bucky's buddies. that's some quality hott. totally didn't expect that from Bucky.

but i guess HCwDB is all about defying expectations.
 

Layla hott, definitely trampier. Easier to corrupt. Turn to the dark side she will... with my penis.
 

bucky has a thing for the tan men!
 

hit the gym son !