Does being the janitor mean you "work" in the law office?
 

the last time i had the unfortunate experience of filin a lawsuit, i had to get it dry cleaned.



ba ding!



he's a piece of work, isn't he?
 

I wonder if he took the time to review the sterling record of success previous lawsuits against this website have enjoyed.
 

Janitor? That's being nice. I was thinking coffee bitch. By the tone of the message, I smell a ringer, his English improved too much.
 

Hmmm...I thought his myspace account said he setup merchant accounts in quickbooks - thats a far cry from a law office in my book.
 

Who in Bob names their kid Colt? Is his middle name 45? I think I'll name my first born Old English.

I wanted to give Colt the benefit of the doubt so I tried to imagine exactly what job it is that he might have in a law office (janitor aside). Doing so just caused my brain the equivalent of a Blue Screen if Death. I will now reboot it with more coffee.
 

I'm sure that Colt will assert-- "I wun this batle!"
 

There are two types of people that work in law offices: attorneys and the people that kiss the attorneys asses to keep their menial (look it up Colt) jobs.

Colt, how does attorney ass taste?
 

http://tinyurl.com/nhyks8 Cmon buddy let it go, war's over, have a laugh at yourself already. Interwebs are forever
 

If that dipshit is a Marine, I'm an office plant.

We never, and I mean never, refer to ourselves as "ex" Marines. We annoy the shit out of our friends and family when they refer to us as "ex" or "former" Marines by loudly reminding them that there are no ex-Marines.

Once a Marine, Always a Marine. Marines also don't state the fact that we are Marines whilst taunting a rival. That's for turds that pray their tattoos, Tapout shirts, and false bravado will mask the 30 year old boy who, like an orphaned elephant, gets scared shitless when a real man comes in.

Semper Fi!
 

I love the fact that more than one person in the comment thread told him to either ask for a takedown or suck it up, yet he still decided to go the "lawsuit" route. (I feel like I have to use quotes, since angry crayon scrawlings about "COLT VIRSES HATTERS" on the back of a Denny's kids' menu doesn't really constitute a legal brief in most states.)

It's been said before, but I'll say it again. Douchebags of the World: If you don't want people looking at, and potentially making fun of your dumb ass, DON'T POST PHOTOS ACCESSIBLE TO ANYONE ON THE WEB! Make your stupid profiles private (except don't really, because I like making fun) so only your "bras" and "hos" can see them. I know your bloated egos make you assume that everybody wants to see what a "playah" you are and enjoys seeing evidence of your idiotic adventures "down da sho-ah," but really, it's not true. At best, nobody cares besides your idiot frat brothers. At worst, everybody's laughing at you.
 

its a floor cleaner its a dessert topping, its a client account processor, its bennie stulwitz from l.a. law...

anyway onward and upward.
 

Then again he did give us his email address so we could "tell it to his face"...we should email him and congratulate him on his successful take down.

By congratulate him I mean continue to mock him.
 

Later on Dolt.
And a big shout out to all your posse down at the "Greasey Hole" and your dance partners wherever you and the local GEMA's hang.
Back to filin your nails.
 

And now that I think about it, Colt tells us that "X MARINES HAVE NO MERCEY ON WEAK SOBS!" but he decides to threaten a lawsuit? What a puss.

Here's hopin' that the much better examples from the armed forces who have been commenting lately will stick around and enjoy the fun.
 

i'm pretty sure he works in some form of clerical position - he's in charge of spelling and grammar of all the final documents. his performance reviews are most likely stellar. we should look up to him.

...either that or this guy is full of shit.

yep, probably full of shit.

- C.G.
 

C'mon people, lets make "all my picture will be removed" the new "all your base are belong to us" of the intarwebs. Who's with me?

- management
 

I can't fathom any law office tollerating someone with that general appearance and scote taint. Not to mention, at a law office, they use Microsoft Word, not Werd, which has spelling and grammar checking features.
 

Apparently Law Offices don't require a general knowledge of punctuation and/or spelling to obtain a job.

If that's the case, as a Journalism student, I'm at least as qualified as this guy!
 

"i am so gonna sue your ass! i'm gonna win big time. ha, so suck it! ...but gosh, i just hope you get this email BEFORE i win."

what a fucking idiot.

anytime i apply for a job like that, i ALWAYS lick and stick a fake tattoo on my neck. makes me so in.

- C.G.
 

Seconded, DB1.

@Mr. White
You missed the point dude. X marines SHOW their mercilessness by filing lawsuits on weak sobs. That is how they bring the pain. Ask any of 'em. Kicking people's asses is SOOOO 1997.
To be fair, he warned us. But did we listen? NooooOOOOOOoooo.
 

So on his myspace page he 'sexes' up his professional experience by claiming to work with quickbooks? She-it why didn't I think of that, I bet the hos get all moist when he drops that tidbit.

But he really works in a law office -- which can either mean, as has been pointed out, he's a gofer or given his tats he just hangs out at the free law clinic at the local state u's law school.


You gotta scrounge up the 'filin' fee there master scrotgeant colt, before the clerk will stamp it for you...
 

thirded, DB1.





thirded?
 

runty twaffle would be better served suing whatever educational institutions he attended for failure to teach proper grammar, spelling, syntax etc.

ignorant & pathetic little goof... he would have to mate with a member of MENSA in hopes of spawning something other than a retard... cut your nads off Colt, for the good of mankind!
 

What a douchebag. Yesterday, he said he worked for a credit card processing company and now it's a law office?

All complete bullsh*t. He scrubbed all the pics off his myspace page and he deleted his "about me" profile that discusses his real occupation as well highlights his complete inability to spell.

Methinks he received quite a few e-mail messages and now is rethinking his previous approach.

Please let us know if suit is filed, DB1. I am sure there are lawyers out here that would LOVE to help out with that suit....
 

Jesus. I was SO set to have a productive day of work today. And then this idiot has to go paint a giant bull's eye on himself while basically saying "Hey Vader, I bet you can't make fun of me!" Good work, Colt. Why don't you dare me to drink a beer while you're at it?

How else can my day get blasted to utter distraction? What's next? A Veronica montage?
 

I say, what's next? A Veronica montage?
 

@vader

I think you're right--clearly I am not up to date on the latest methods of warfare and soldiering. The battlefields of tomorrow will be patrolled by 5'2" douches with legal briefs.

Or killer robots. One of the two.
 

@ 10:18 Douche Shower & Shave
What is a GEMA?
 

Don't all law offices have guys with faux hawks with skull and bones tattoos on their necks?? US Attorney, Patrick Fitzgerald, was just on the news showing off his sweet skull and bones neck tat.

My favorite line is, "hopefully you get this email in time." Um....it's an e-mail, not Pony Express or carrier pigeon.

I don't believe this guy was a Marine, either.
 

Mr. White- your Orphanage kid avatar is creeping me the hell out.
 

did someone say a Veronica montage?
 

Give the little baby his Ass Pear a couple days early and he'll be less aggro.
 

his myspace says he works for a merchant processor...a menial sales job.
 

GEMA
Gay-Enlisted-Marine-Association
 

And I don't think being in a Village People cover band qualifies as having been in the marines.
 

@ Pfah, DB1

Fourthed? Fourth-ded?


ALL MY PICTURE WILL BE REMOVED
ALL MY PICTURE WILL BE REMOVED
ALL MY PICTURE WILL BE REMOVED
ALL MY PICTURE WILL BE REMOVED

I'm writing Snorgtees right now to see about getting that one done up. It's gonna catch on like herpes!

Yes, my sentiments exactly, the proper image for a law office is a giant black skull and crossbones tattoo on your neck. THAT is the reassuring, staid and capable image the client needs in times of legal distress.

If he is working in a law office, he's the pivot man for the company circle jerk.

I'm so sick of these legal threats. Can't you read? Wait, don't answer that. You got us all in a lather saying how much you "Loved all the Hatters" and now you're crying that you can't take it anymore? You're a big bad mofo and yet you need a lawyer to make us stop?

My mother always told me, the best way to defuse a bully is to ignore him. People mock because it's fun, and it just gets better the more the victim protests. Heed the example of the venerable Four Points, (whom I am too lazy to find on here at the moment) who took our ribbing with a chuckle, and he is now a HCwDB hero.

Colt, your whining, threatening and back talking only inflamed the bullying. It's really very simple playground psychology, unfortunately. Perhaps in the real world, we're not the biggest, toughest or strongest people. However, in THIS domain, the 'baghunter reigns supreme, and for the most part we are a united front. No one likes to be flagellated in such a manner, but it happens when you make your image part of the public domain. And you simply aren't going to win the argument by storming in here and making threats, you're just whacking a beehive with a stick.

My grandmother, the late Shirley Oblongata, used to say "Never put anything in writing that you wouldn't want on the front page of the New York Times." Had she lived long enough to see Teh Interwebs, she'd have said, "Never do anything in front of a camera that you wouldn't want mocked from ten thousand laptops." I just got my Facebook account yanked on account of objectionable content. I'm not sure what it was but I suspect it was related to photos of a certain someone in a rubber gown, whaling on someone's ass with a frat paddle. I put it the image out there, and suffered a consequence as a result.

So, Colt, lesson learned...If you build it, we will mock. And you were stupid enough to give us ways to contact you personally. And as someone who actually had a scary incident with cyber stalking that crossed into real-life stalking, let me tell you this: Unless there is a clear and actual threat of violence, there is NOTHING anyone can do. So enjoy the deluge of gay porn spam you are about to receive.

Sincerely,

Medusa Oblongata
 

I ain't soft.


http://img33.imageshack.us/i/118azk.jpg/
 

The funny part about this DB's myspace was that he claimed to have 100K-150K in income. Ha,ha,ha! I really don't know of any retards like him making that kind of money....Now, if he's blowing & rimming the senior partners at his law office, I'd give him a pass on that tidbit of info.. DOUCHE ON COLT!
 

@medusa

Wait a minute...why I am I only hearing about rubber-clad ass paddling now, when it's already gone?
 

and i was a Marine



http://img29.imageshack.us/i/98551470l.jpg/
 

When the going gets tough, the tough get to filin lawsuits.
 

I know I am going to regret asking this, but, um, what, exactly, does the pivot man of a circle jerk do? I didn't even think a circle jerk could HAVE a point man...'cause it's a circle.

I say, what's next? A Veronica montage?
 

there it is again!


a Veronica montage.
 

and not to spoil the fun here, but DB1?

the link jumping from "And with a posse this douchey" still is active to one of his pictures.


i sure wouldn't want you in trouble with Colt.

golly.
 

DV-

I'm guessing the pivot man is the canvas on which a circle of budding Jackson Pollocks would paint.
 

@seminolefan...didn't you mean: Jackson Pullcocks?
 

Anyway, I am an attorney. I have worked at a big firm in Chicago, I have worked at a small firm in the Chicago suburbs, and now I have my own firm in Wisconsin. Never once have I seen an employee with neck tats. Not in IT or the mailroom at the big firm, not working as a janitor after hours (most attorneys will actually get to know the janitors, as we're still at the office occasionally very late). No effing way would any attorney I know even considering hiring a person with neck tats to work at the office, because no client with money to spend on legal services is going to want to see this douchebag and know that he is part of the team the lawfirm has assembled to help safeguard the client's interests.

So Colt, either you are full of shit about working at a law office, or possibly you work with the Public Defender, who never files civil suits anyway. You are the runny, gelatinous goo that oozes off of a dead skunk's taint, and everyone you know with the IQ necessary to tie their own shoes realizes that you are the very acme of douchebagdom.
 

@Medusa: Even though "Colt" will, in all likelihood not read this, it's worth a (re)perusal as the afternoon haze destroys what's left of the workday:
Four Points writes in.
 

@pfah-

You're right. My bad.
 

I would have called him on it. I mean it's one thing if he just asked to have pics of him removed but when the threatened legal action, I would have called his bluff just so he would have to get on his knees a little (Lord knows he would've have enjoyed that).
 

Anon @ 10:16 nailed it.

Nor would a man who has endured the trial of earning his title ever pull a pussy ass move like threatening a lawsuit when people make fun of him.

He can fuck himself once for being such a jerkoff, and he can fuck himself again with a 30" thorned tree stump if he's impersonating a Marine.

Hey, shitbird, unless you were dishonorably discharged you never use the words "I WAS a Marine."
 

I think his definition of "working at a law firm" is a little different than ours. We imagine Dewey, Cheatam and Howe, with well-dressed, well-educated people working in a nicely appointed office. Colt's "law firm" is the library at the local prison, complete with degenerates sporting neck tats and busted old law books from the 1980s. A word of advice, Mr. Colt: don't skip your GED classes to do research in your "law firm" b/c it behooves you. Look it up, dipwad.
 

HAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

Oh shit, I just pissed myself. The bladder dam bust a leak from my deep and meaningful bellylaughs. Colt can obviously afford to get that retarded skull and crossdicks tattoo removed, what with his $150k salary from his creditcard processing/quickbooks/law office jobs. However, I bet the closest that Colt has gotten to the Marines is playing the role of the soldier in a Village People cover band.

I weep for the future, as this genetic trainwreck will undoubtably impregnate a few equally awful females, raise them on Playstation, McDonalds and physical abuse, ensuring that they become little choadclones that future generations can make fun of on the interweb.
 

So what's a day in court like with the
Dolt & Associates Law Firm?

Dolt: Yo J (judge) u'z be hattin on my bro here'z....Ice be fillin meece somz apeel...so u'z nee too chang ur mine beflor u'z git it....I workz in a law office
 

I think the claim of a lawsuit is BS. The writing styles are too different (take it from someone who used to write). Different style, different spelling, different punctuation, different capitalization. Different guy.

That being said: you're the boss, DB1.

By the way,

"all my picture will be removed" would sound better as "all my picture are be removed"
 

Note to Colt the Dolt,

"You lie down with dogs you get up with fleas."

Lawsuits are for losers.
 

"X TRUE EDGE X said...
and i was a Marine



http://img29.imageshack.us/i/98551470l.jpg/"

Am a Marine. Any Marine i know would blacken your eye for such blasphamy. As was pointed out, Colt claims on his my space page that he sets up merchant accounts. Bascially he is the wanker who hooks up debit machines. Armed with a bag of bannanas i can teach a chimp to do that job.
 

Man, I leave for two weeks and people are filin lawsuits. What did I miss?
 

Assuming X True Edge X is actually "Colt"...you ask for your pictures to be removed....but then post links to pictures of yourself??? What am I missing???

"Don't show those pictures! Show these pictures!"

BTW, your friend flunks firearm safety 101. NEVER point your gun barrel at your face!
 

Colt, do you have names for your tats? if not may i propose one for your neck. You should call it, "no high paying corporate job for me, EVER".
 

All I can say is that in 10 years or less he will regret those tattoos. You better die quick buddy, because you're going to look awfully silly as 40 year old skull/crossbones clown. Your parents and future children will be so proud.
 

I doubt Dolt can pony up the $150 filing fees.

And "I work in a law office" means "I make copies and will con some toolbox attorney who thinks I'm cool to do it for me."

As an attorney I would love to address the drawbacks and merits to Dolt's cause of action against Management, however I will limit my comments to the following:

What a complete f*cking douchebag child.
 

I don't think the tattoos are the reason he'll never get a high-paying corporate job - it'll probably be his rezumay in allz it'z gloree.
 

@ Mr. White 11:02
Shoulda friended me on Facebook, then. ASVB, Idaho Hott, Wheeze and BVG saw it. Neener, neener neener. However, you may make a cash offer for your own personal copy.

Speaking of Idaho Hott...I need to re-add you and I can't find you. Find me, I'm back on with the above.

@ Douche Vader 11:04
He's in the middle of the circle. And he pivots when he's needed. Get it? Keeps the carpets clean in the office, ya know. See Seminolefan @11:11 for a brilliant analogy.

@ Et Douche 11:20
Aaaah, thank you. Wheeze, you feckin' slacker, you're going to lose your job as HCwDB reference librarian in a minute....
 

this has turned into quite the epic beatdown.

i almost feel bad for Colt, or X True Edge X, or whatever the hell his name is. almost.




i said almost.
 

I ain't soft; it's hardass to hang around with scantily-clad men in waist deep murky water sipping beverages.

IT'S CALLED A BATH HOUSE YOU SILLY LADY!!!
 

Now I get it - he has "TRUE EDGE" tattooed on his fingers - TRUE on the right hand and EDGE on the left...

Good thing his ridiculously poor spelling didn't surface when he had those done...

Though perhaps "DULL EDGE" would've been more appropriate...
 

Dont feel sorry for this poser.
DB1 is it possible to find a special award or
"Hall of Asswipes" for this steamy pile of dreck that threatens you and those that mock his "sword swallowing ass?"
No mercy.
 

Colt, being the parking garage attendant working under the Taylor, Epstein & Medoza Building, doesn't make you an employee of their law firm.
 

@lulu

Good point, although in this case, I'm pretty O.K. with them pointing the business ends of their weapons at their faces.
 

I run a small law firm with two other lawyers, and I can tell you that we wouldn't let someone who looks like coltbag clean our toilets. He doesn't even seem literate enough to sort mail
 

Can we file a class action suit against Colt for his existence?
 

How can a frigging idiot stick like him even have a job....and pull good looking chicks too? There are some genuine good people with skills and a tad of education out there who can't find work ...or get any hot either...it jus' ain't fair junior....
 

Colonel Colt Klink is filing a lawsuit?

I am as shocked as my wife was the time she walked in on me using her hairbrush to scratch my jock itch-y nutsack....
 

We need Houghton Mifflin to publish a Douchebag-to-English Dictionary.
 

Hmmm...it seems that this fellow is now a registered sex offender in all 50 states now...well that's what I heard anyways...

ALL MY PICTURE WILL BE REMOVED


What's all this about a Four Points montage?
 

FYI - if you google "Colt Curtis" and California, his myspace page is at the top of the list. Click on the "cached" link and the old page is still in the cache - complete with pictures!! Also, here is the now infamous narrative where he identifies his employment situation:

A lil about me .... my names Colt Curtis, was born and raised in simi valley ca. have a beautiful lil girl named Hanna, lil handfull she is haha. love ridin dirtbikes, boating, anything to do with the lake love pitbulls old cars and anything that isnt a team sport haha i.e. fighting, riding etc. I am a xxx straight edge and live up to it also dont drink dont smoke none of that garbage ... MAKES YOU WEAK ...! weather you see it or not haha . The change is only for a few, well the ones with the stronger mind i guess. I was in the marine corps for 4 years way back when went to iraq and all shhitty deal. haha, guess you really dont know what ya have till ya been there ! seriously, For work i do merchant processing credit card processing that is, with quickbooks. we set up merchant accounts for buissiness that want to accept credit cards. Love my job, have to be very good at it or id be out of one. haha any other questions just ask... xxx (olt xxx
p.s. AS FOR MY TOP FRIENDS IF YOU MADE IT UP THERE CONGRATS!!!... IT MEANS UR DOING SOMETHING GOOD IN MY LIFE TO BE THERE ... FUCK WITH ANY OF THEM ILL GO BACK TO MY OIF 3 RITUALS ... COLT
 

There once was a douchebag named Colt
Whose tattoos made him look like a dolt
He says he’s a Marine
But spells like a preteen
So we verbally give him a jolt.
 

DB1: It's "let's," as in "let us," not "lets."

I would hate for you to sink to the grammatical level of a Colt, dude.
 

"buissiness"?!??


what the fuck is that? a French dessert?
 

Garçon! two buissinesses for the table please. and make sure they are warm.
 

Shit like this makes cringe and want to go out a slap a unicorn.

As a Marine who put in 8 years of active duty, it always gets to me when one of my fellow "Teufelhunden" goes of the reservation and embarrasses the Corp.

I guess all the advice from other Marines here to un-fuck yourself and square your shit away was gaffed off.

Well good luck to you then you stinking twat of a douche. Let us know how that lawsuit goes.

@Gaijindouche:

Almost as bad as impersonating Marine is a douche who will compare his rush week at his frat to boot camp.
 

"Happy July 4th!!
PIC DELETED"

You'd think that of all the possibilities, an ex-Marine would be thrilled to be represented on the Fourth of July.

But no, not "LOL't (and) Hurt'is Feelings."

Distemper FiFi! for all the poor little baby douchebags who can't handle the results of their fucking idiocy.....
 

Figures this twat stain would be from slimey valley.
 

When he says "more legals matters involved", does he really mean "more legal maters"? Because a good, ripe mater is impossible to find the the mega-gorcery-mart, but LEGAL maters are another matter.
 

Come on, guys - perhaps Dolt really does work in a law office.....
 

Fuck colt 1st of he's a douche thats why he's on the site 2nd hes a bitch because he cant handel it..Take your verbal ass whiping like a man dont be a bitch

nuff said
 

Works in a law office. Obviously his role there is cleaning toilet bowls with those pouty, faggy lips of his.

He wouldn't know what to do with that hottie if she was doing squats two inches above his face.

What a douche.
 

He's not an 'ex' Marine. If he had been in the corps he'd have taken the noble path in this situation and killed himself rather than disgrace the USMC with his ultra-douche whining pussy - but ultimately empty - threat of litigation.

Oh, and those are some purty lips he's got there.
 

If you choose to act like a douche, don't fucking whine when you get called on it. You goddamn douche. People will always 'hat' on you no matter how many of them you threaten to 'fil' a lawsuit against you douchebag.
 

I can't believe you let this DBag scare you into taking things down. If it was me running the site, I'd have put three times as many photos up of him! 1.) His lack of grammar/spell check or proof reading clearly indicates he is a liar about having anything to do with preparing legal things. 2.) No law firm would take the case of a 20 something year old tattooed douchebag wanting pictures HE POSTED on a PUBLIC website taken off another PUBLIC website. There is no copyright issue and he sure can't sue you for slander for calling him a douchebag! 3.) It is obvious this guy is a lie chameleon who can come up with a story about something he is not to try to scare someone. Isn't that what being a douchebag is all about ... putting on a ridiculous front to mask your insecurities?
 

@Anon, 1:05 p.m. -

Actually, DB1 offers this to any punks who can't take the heat:

If you're in a photo and upset about the verbal smackdown you morally and spiritually deserve, email me and I'll take down the photo.

It's been there in his "About Me" section as long as I can remember.
 

haha this site is funny
 

I work in a law office.....as an attorney. Let me tell you what happens when a-holes like this Office Max Rubberband Man supply cart choad come to us for help. "Hey, Joe, can you help me sue someone for posting pix of me on their website?" "Sure, bro, I got your back! Anything for a friend." "Aw, thanks Joe. Here are those binder clips you wanted." (bumps fists with atty and closes door behind him) Attorney says, "What a f***ing loser douche......"
 

Im filin lawsuitzzz hattazzzzz! legal mattazz iz gunna be involved!

hahaha what a crybaby

~Justin
 

Here is an idea... take a Colt-45 and blow the living douche out of you and then we won't have a problem. Makes me frightened at the possibility that innocent Iraq pedestrians had to see him stinking up the place in Axe while off duty.
 

for an "ex-marine" he sure is acting like a pussy....
 

so much hate ,ha ha
every internet commando posting should go join this shit . .

http://www.comedycentral.com/videos/index.jhtml?videoId=24419&title=the-playa-haters-ball

haha hate , hate , hate !!!!

maybe you can be player hater of the year. ha ha

-buck nasty
 

Wow. If the 'filin' email is legit, I'd hate to hear the censure our man @Froggy would fire off to this poor Colt dude.


And to think a man with the sack of our beloved 'Four Points' wasn't even a Marine.
 

im a hater !! . i hate seeing guys get chicks .. what the fuck am i doing wrong ?!?!
 

im so happy they have this site . i can make fun of people without confronting them !
btw colts a fag.
ha ha ha
#1 Douche bag
 

Sounds like Mike Hammer is gonna come kick your ass.
 

Well, looking at the caches sites, I think he's legit. More legit than my ass, who never fired a shot in anger. To the Colt Curtis of years past who slept in the dirt and kicked down doors day in and day out with his life on the line: I'd give you the shirt off my back if you needed it, the keys to my car, a place to stay, anything you needed as a brother of mine.

To the Colt Curtis of today:

Take a look in the mirror, then take a look at a picture of yourself, years ago while you mired in the suck, and tell me which makes you more proud.

Anyone can lose their way, and once lost anyone can find it again if they look.
 

@Anon 1:44 p.m. -

You should go to gay bars.
 

oh-eight hundred, like thats supposed to impress us with his knowledge of military time. Like we're afraid of scote taint marine whose going to come kick our asses over the internet.

I wonder if the courts are even open to file motions 0800. I would bet, like every other employee sucking on the government teet, that that they don't start dealing with bull shit until say 0900. BTW, that 9AM for those of you who aren't badass marines with shitty tats. But I am guessing he would know better, since he works in a law office. If I worked in a law office and I wanted to impress a bunch of people on the interweb, I would tell them I was a lawyer or para-legal, so I am guessing monkey boy pumps gas for a living.
 

Ok, the documentation for this matter. I'm thinking it goes something like this:

colt Curtis vs. HATTERS et al


--VS
 

This post has been removed by the author.
 

No one once having served in the Marine Corp, ever refers to themselves or others who have served, as "ex-Marines" It is always Former Marine....it is written....
 

first, Colt pisses off soldiers.

now, Colt pisses off lawyers.

who's he gonna piss off next?

i think the safest way out for him is to impersonate a cop.

because HCwDB history shows that when you purport that previous Marine cred gives you the right to be a douchebag, half of the US Navy will get on your case (thanks for confirming this hard truth in the most spectacular way possible Colt!). but when you purport that being a cop gives you the right to be a douchebag (like Jules James a while back - check the comments), it was like every other police officer in the US disappeared for a few hours.

but random knocks on cops aside, i do want to reiterate - i feel bad for Colt's kid. is he supposed to have a son or daughter? doesn't matter.

hey, Colt is a lot easier to pwn than Arthur Kade, but even Arthur Kade doesn't have kids. in some ways, Colt is gonna do a lot more damage to society than Kade if he keeps his head in his ass.
 

Has anyone commented on the douche in the picture ?? lol
fucking chick hes with is smoking hot,too hot for him that's for sure . Maybe its his sister .Looks like the chick from "heroes"
 

He is NOT a Marine! They never say "X"...once a Marine always a Marine. He's a barslug from the gutter....
 

Hey DB1 - check your inbox. Santa got your letter.
 

Who in Bob names their kid Colt?

Well, there's Mr. McCoy's son Colt, and Mr. Brennan's son Colt. Maybe you can ask them?
 

Yes I remember procedures in first year law school...they taught us all about "filin." And "hattas." And so on. What a farking moron this guy was...old DOLT Curtis.
 

Iya am a jelly doughnut.
 

How Cute - Colt Curtis acts all bad ass one minute and then tries the old "I work for a law firm..." the next.

Big egotistical fucking baby can't handle it when a bunch of strangers pick his delicate facade apart. Wah... take your douche mockery like a man.

-asshat
 

On the day the Coltster has to go to his deposition, who's going to put paper in the copier?
 

@324 that's not funny, has no one thought about what might happen to me? i could be permanently misplaced. i rely on colt's caring and compassion.
 

I bet he was a sniper.
 

Von Goolo strikes again.

Word.
 

nice work Baron G.

you are a man among boys.
 

God Bless The Baron. That is some funny shit.
 

Hey Colt...or "True Edge" or whatever,

Thank you for your time and the service and what you did for our country. Sincerely.

Here's a thought:
Use your deserved mockery as a positive thing...an intervention if you will.
Stop. Think. Un-fuck yourself.

Stop telling people that you're going to sue them, or show them "NO MERCEY", whatever that means.

There is douche in all of us...notice that the creator of this site calls himself "DB1"? Think about what that stands for and why.

This site is about mocking douche, in ourselves or others or wherever it exists.

Douche exists in you, brotha, big time. Laugh at yourself. Lighten up a little maybe. Un-fuck yourself. Maybe even think about un-tattooing yourself a little, for the sake of your employment future if nothing else.

Mainly be real. There's plenty of people here would say this shit to your face, and go on to kick your ass for you if you tried to show them "NO MERCEY". Suing HCwDB is clearly not a viable answer. A simple take-down request would accomplish more than a threat.

What people on this blog think or say isn't going to make a shit in your life. Not taking something away from it will.

Square your shit away and un-fuck yourself.

Sincerely,
K-man
 

That was beautiful K-Man.

When I logged on I saw the take down reuqest and I was a little dissapointed, not shocked, but dissapointed, because I was hoping if Froggy was able to take him under his wing... um flipper... he might man up, learn to laugh at himself a bit (a necessary trait to be a decent human being IMHO) and be a better man for it.

But then he doesn't even post a manly take down request, but instead tries the law suit BS that only the choadiest of the choad go for.

So when I looked to open up the comment thread that had just been opened during the time I was at work and saw 119 posts I started laughing, and haven't stopped.

Thank you all for being the twisted, brilliant, twisted souls that you are.
 

He's not a fucking Marine.

Stop giving the turd affirmation by thanking him for his "service." A true Marine would never simply say, "and I am a Marine" when someone's skeptic about his service. If he's legitimate, why didn't this stain give his MOS, duty station, rank, DD-214 stats, unit, or any other fact of service that would give credence to his claim.

First, the only evidence he has is a picture. I don't know about you; but when I was on active duty in the Corps, we didn't carry our M16A-2s to costume parties. These Marines are in the field and stumble upon some models in faux military outfits?

Any asshole can don some Marine cammy's with a plastic rifle. No Marine ever refers to himself or herself as "ex."
 

On the one hand I feel sorry for him; a short, insecure guy who has gotten in over his head crafting an "edgy" persona to satisfy a chick that's hotter than he's had before. Trouble is he hasn't got the chops to maintain the image under scrutiny from anyone more astute than Bree.

And that's the other hand. You're working your "straight edge badass" game on the weak and helpless, like Bree who might still giggle when she queefs. When the company gets sharper, you don't. Thus the final bit of advice. If you can't live it and you can't act it then either run away without the sad parting shots or sack up and take it with a smile.
 

The moment I saw Colt's "filing" email, I knew I had to come in here and read the verbal beatdown that Colt would be getting. And I've not been disappointed.

Having worked with attorneys, I can't for a second imagine Colt AKA True Edge got through the front door as anything other than "Witness For the defense #2".

And Colt, take the verbal abuse not as "hatters" dissin' you. Take a good, hard, tough look in the mirror and, in the words of so many others above, "UNFUCK YOURSELF."

We all make mistakes. You don't have to be a douche to get girls.

-- Indouchey Jones
 

ALL YOUR PICTURE ARE BELONG TO US !!!
 

@BVG: GREAT work!
 

Somebody set us up the lawsuit.

WHAT YOU SAY?!?
 

I found his wife

www.myspace/mrscoltcurtis.com

Colt I wanna steal your girl.......

You fucking douche bag
 

This douchebag is an insult to the Indianapolis Colts.

This douchebag drinks Colt45's then pukes them right back up in a fit of bulimia.

This douchebag has a target on his neck only a Serengeti lion could love.

This douchebag is by definition a hooker if he hooks-up retailers with credit card processors.Law office my friggin' ass: NOT.

This douchebag's contents have drained totally out of the rubber hot-water bottle and done their civic duty of contributing to the sanitary sewer system.

This douchebag is living proof of the Great Bowel Shift, emanating poo. Take him down, down, down to the water-filtration plant.

Enough already.
 

Wow, why is it always the pencil pushers who talk hard? Supply? Nah, he looks like the division H&HQ PFC who takes all fucking day to get you your SRB, then forgets to have the CO sign off on your dd-214 so you can finally peace out, all this after he gives you an attitude that he is better then you and has better things to do, even though thats his job. He needs a green weenie in his mouth to shut him up.

What a dick
 

@ Wheezer 8:17 and others

Thank you, but I am just a humble wrist executing the will of DB1. Honestly, the idiocy of your average douchebag has all melted into a steady white noise for me, sort of like that constant, seashell droning you get after an earwig's eaten straight through your brain. I would have been incapable of focusing in on that one line myself.
 

Colt you suck so hard. Even Fish Slap is gonna bez filin a lawsuit on youz a$$ for givn himz blue-ball.

Also, DJ Bello called. He needs you for his next hit video production.

Hehe.. wonder wtf that kid's up to lately. And fuck Fung!!
 

He so bad ass he had to change his email address so wees stop filin bad emailz @ his sheate!!
Namer out
 

@teh abominable snowdouche....wow. DJ Bello. i hadn't thought of him in quite some time. and, like you, i wonder what the shitbrick is up to. probably an eyebrow waxing.

thanks for the memories broheim!
 

@teh abominable snowdouche....wow. DJ Bello. i hadn't thought of him in quite some time. and, like you, i wonder what the shitbrick is up to. probably an eyebrow waxing.

thanks for the memories broheim!
 

Colt, wanna hear a knock knock joke?

"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"Go fuck yourself!"
 

Callin this dude's bluff
 

BVG. That is the greatest thing ever in the history of forever. Thank you.
 

@ pfah 8:43

he's frollicking
 

So heres what happened.

Days 1-3: douchebones and his woman joke about being added to the site, haha thanks for making us famous.

Day 4: douchebones reads all the comments, his feelings are hurt and his woman is second guessing her choice in man.

Day5-present: When duchebones goes to the grocery store or the corner store , or anywhere, somebody recognizes and instead of giving him the "mad props" he usually gets, they cal him douchebones and make fun of him.

Present - douchebones files a lawsuit , not realizing the attorneys will milk him for $10-15k and he'll have a very good shot at LOSING the case. Posibly even needing to pay legal fees to HcWDB.

The Future - douchebones puts his house up for sale to cover legal fees, hott leaves him for a non-douche having learned from this site.

THE END.
 

Works at a law office... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! He can't even spell, much less make up a plausible lie! What a pathetic loser. His neck tatts have sealed is ultimate lose-dom forever. He is destined to work at the likes of Hot Topic, Vince Neil Ink, any douchetastic Nightclub in Las Vegas, and ultimately at the license plate stamping line in federal prison.
 

I hope Dolt plans to sue the Internet:

http://m.mippin.com/mip/prev/story.jsp?&id=46098&c=-1&s=18&pv=1&sid=59877651&cat=Entertainment&check=1&z=1@1247216031647656
 

-Am going to soo yoo unlees yoo poot pickures bak on da websit..
 

This post has been removed by the author.
 

An ex-Marine doesn't exist. He ain't no Marine, because the Marine Corps is nothing but %100 critisizm day in day out but he can't handle getting reamed online, outfreakinstanding! he is however a definite shitbird, can't take it that people are making fun of ya'. For christ sake do you know how to spell G.E.D ? Quit being a legend in your own mind and quiver and whine as you pull the tampon out. Colt, I a have an M67 with your name on it
 

http://www.myspace.com/lovelessfalls

To all you hatters out there!
 

i love u colt!
 

You know the best way to stay off this website?? Don't dress, act, and pose for pictures like a fucking douche bag. Take a step out of your over inflated ego and look at yourself in the mirror and imagine how the rest of the world really sees you.

Better yet, have somebody follow you around with a video camera to capture the fist pumping, shit talking, and self praised ego boosting that makes your friday nights. The next day watch it, and get a good glimpse of reality...