There's a douchey with your name written all over it Poopaloompa: Most orange orange.

But the lack of hot will likely be your downfall when it comes to Bag of the year.
 

Congratulations Poopa!

You look like a 1930's baseball glove, with a women's haircut.

Keep up the good (bad) work.
 

I feel like Poopaloompa should take his rightful place in the Closet of Poo, and Bagpoleon should get the pass to the next round. I've passionately defended Poop's lady friend before, but it's clear that the majority feels that the hott is lacking in this pic, therefore reducing this to mere sideshow comedy instead of true hott-douche dialectic. Let Poop combat in the Orangest Orange, but let contenders with more serious hottage battle it out for the yearly.

What say you, Boss?
 

Jane isn't that unattractive to dismiss on technical grounds. She's a lady of reproductive capability and nice teeth, and so she qualifies for the H.C. side.
 

@DB1

I agree with you regarding the teeth, but I question your knowledge of her reproductive capability. What kind of special powers do you possess (and may I learn them)? She could be cyborg from the sternum down. Which would be kind of hot.

Just sayin'.
 

Yeah, I voted for 'Bagpoleon, but damn, we have to realize that Poopaloompa wanted to look like that. If his hotts were hotter, say along Alana's va-va-voom volleyballer quality, he could've - no, would've - been a shoo-in.

I thought about this for a little bit a few minutes ago and realized there must also be a lasting quality about a choad. I realize we can't always have a (Fuck) Fish Slap or Tighty Armani-type assbag in every Weekly/Monthly (thankfully, if you think about it), but any memorable scroteputz should always make us shiver a little bit while pissing us off. I think 'Bagpoleon just pisses us off and/or makes us laugh at his little man antics, but Poopa also frightens us a la Fung.

'Bagpoleon can just dress a little differently and pass by unnoticed, but Poopa can't cover all that orange unless he's doing his Wacko Jacko skin-lightening act (a la Sammy Sosa). And that is equally disturbing.

Just my two cents on this fine Veteran's Day, even though it may make little sense.
 

This makes me sad.
 

I am so fucking bummed. I only scissor with the hots that win the monthly (a girl's gotta have standards). Sorry Alana. On a side note; Jane, you just won the lottery.
 

I completely agree with Mr. White on this one. Winning the Weekly is one thing. Induction to the Closet of Poo is an honorable thing for a skid mark such as this. However, winning the Monthly puts you in the category of 12 final contenders to represent the biggest Hot Chick with Douchebag ‘combo’ of the year. Many noobs here forget the ‘combo’ portion.

With all due respect to the Houston Rocket’s, I don't want our HCwDB champion to be the ’94-’95 Rockets. I want the ‘91-‘93Bulls and the ’96-’98 Bulls. I want the best of the best. I don’t want a sorta-maybe-she’s okay chick. I want a hott Surfer Girl Kelly, Carly Hott, Josephine, etc… as my victor. Remember, when archeologists unearth this site from the plains of Moab in three thousand years, and they open the page to the 2009 Hottest Chick with Douchiest Bag winner… let us not allow them to think that Poopa’s harem of mediocrity is the best we had to offer. Let us give them our best and final answer, Regis.


Here I am getting all worked up when this will all be a Smoot point in the end.

Gezzus, I need a drink.
 

A good argument can be made for Poopaloompa's win in that the whole notion of this site is based on the model scenario: Grieco does douche and takes Bleeth with him. She descends into total skanked-out misery.

Poopaloompa may just be getting started with his li'l mildly-Hott saucy-girl.

Besides, it's time we had another ORANGE winner. He goes so well with the autumn colors.
 

AND , on another note, site fans will enjoy today's DILBERT cartoon if you're lucky enough to have a newspaper that carries it.

DB1 continues to inspire the world around him, for better or for worse.

If Josephine hadn't "opened" her mouth by writing in, she would have been enough of a total hott for me to vote Bagpoleon/Josephine. She ruined it.

Silence is golden.
 

Never fear, Croosh - I'm sure Poopa's going to be squished in the yard by Smoot's sneakers in the Yearly.....or will E-Blo simply ignore him with that vacant stare whilst claiming the prize?

Perhaps Bucky's mad game will rule all? Or does McJohnson have the award in his Crosshairs?

Regardless, Poopa has no chance in the yearly. For if the aforementioned douchebags can't stop him, there's always.....this guy.



On this Veteran's Day, we must never forget.....
 

That's right, bitches. I'm off to my den of concubines to celebrate. After a few swigs of my royal secret blue elixir of course.

If you could only see Jane's body! All who contend I didn't deserve this will be seized and made to suffer the bore worms.


-Poopa
 

@Wheezer,

I miss having you comment here in the morning brother. You got the day off today?
 

Yeah, it's a day off for us federal employees. I have no computer access at work, either, so that's why I'm never online in the mornings.
 

Don't overlook hottie #2, who qualifies as HC in my opinion. The girl in the orange Poop photo is just an unfortunate bystander; if the two girls were switched, this is a no-brainer.

I am too new to understand the nuances of this technicality. The boss has to call it. But American Girl in Poopie's photo #2 has a Tom Petty song written about her, and I think that meets the test.
 

PS:

Had Mongolian Beef for dinner last night. Halfway through, the image of his Orangeness popped into my head.

Couldn't finish it.
 

I too am with Mr. White on this.

Closet of Poo for Poopa. He is immortal, while his RA Jane (still love that) is not. But he IS.

That is, I always want to be able to find him and refer to him - to compare other florescent skin tones to his in future contests. ("Sure, you're orange, Mr. Coulda-Been-A-Contender, but how do you compare to Poopaloompa, hmmm?")
He is The Royal Standard.
He belongs in a vault in Washington where they keep the Standards.

....a vault without air, mind you.

And I'm quite happy for Bagpolean and Josie to move on to represent October.
 

She is not hot. And if we ignore his orange skin (something impossible to do) he's a stage 2 at best.
 

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary:

1) Hot: capable of giving a sensation of heat or of burning, searing, or scalding.



She's giving me none.
 

Bagpoleon is the kind of guy that likes to brag about his F-350...
 

I hear ya Wheeze. I’ve done some work here and there for the Gub’ment (mostly public schools) and it always makes me jealous when they are afforded a holiday that I’m not privy to. That said, I do enjoy being able to log in here on most days, read DB1’s hilarious commentary, read my fellow ‘baghunters and huntresses hilarious commentary, and occasionally add a squelch or two of mine own.

It really does make the world go ‘round.

And by “the world,” I of course mean “bowels”.
 

Jesus Christ, people... this is a very cute girl. Let's see whose uglies y'all have been bumping.



...yeah, thought so.
 

And I would like to welcome Summer's Eve to the fold.

More 'bag huntresses are always encouraged around here. Medusa, IdahoHottPott, Ashfish, Miss Leigh, HyperSexualGirl, etc... will be happy to have more female ammo with which to pepper the douche-scrotes and bleeth's.

Douche on!
 

I concur with Crucial - we will gladly welcome any and all 'baghuntresses into the fold, especially if some former such regulars would return.

I'm looking at you, Chupacabra!

And now with a tummy full of lunch and our hott huntresses in mind, I think it's time I get in a quick 'bate and a nap.....
 

Don't be surprised if, before the Doucheys, Smoot is lured into the alley behind his favorite club and trampled to death by a runaway herd of wildebleeth.


'Cuz that's how Poopaloompa rolls.
 

Thank you both, Croosh and Wheezer - that made my [apparently really pathetic] day! You both have made me stifle LOLs as I sneak on here during work. Often.

I teach high school.
There are a few of the guys in my school whose faces (and popped collars, fauxhawks, and drunk girlfriends) I fear may well pop up here one day.
And I shall mock them mercilessly.

From afar.

As I already do, behind their backs.
 

For everyone hating on Poopaloompa's hott, take a step back. Odds are she was at one time quite hot. As it is, she's on the positive side of the scale, and show's no sign of bleeth.

However, as any nuclear engineer can attest, being in close proximity to a steaming pile of radioactive waste can be devestating to a woman's body.
 

I would rub astroglide all over Poopa's girls and dutifully work it into their danger spots.

They are delightful real women.

Just got wood. gotta go

Y'all crazy.
 

Guys (Torque and Scrotato), okay, you got me on the crazy part.

But, no one is saying Poopa's girls aren't delightful, real, and comewhat cute.

But hott of the month?

I mean, dude.
 

We're not voting for hot chicks only, the douchebag is the real point of this site. How can any self respecting woman stand next to something that looks like Poopa and enjoy it? That is scary in and of itself.
 

Where the hell is Ashfish, anyway? I feel like I haven't seen her round these parts lately. I know this, in part, because her most recent, bespectacled avatar made me feel tingly "down there." I miss that feeling.
 

I still think E-BlO can take Poopa.


Looks like quite a bit of competition for this year's highest award.
 

Poops girls are not hott, but they are attractive.
 

So this site is officially now full of gaybags. Did any of your morons see a hot in Poopaloompa's pic? Did you thing that url up there just reads "douchebags.com?" Did you not read the FAQ DB1 has about need there to be a hott with a bag?

The majority of voters clearly have lost their way in their comprehension skills. I know the interweb makes you all stupider, but more blind? Or gaybag? Not that there's anything wrong with that, but maybe you need to go find a sight called "hott boys with douchebags" or get all your vision checked.

I'm so angry at the stupidity of the voters I want to kick a baby into rotating helicopter blades.
 

Dude, why the rage?
 

Wrangler, dude, if you can only get turned on by anorexia, silicone, and tattooed-on eyeliner, I don't think you're in a position to be judging others' sexual proclivities.
 

@ImageWrangler

I really wouldn't sweat it. Poopaloompa isn't the first slab of dried cantelope to grace HCwDB, nor is he the only douche DB1 has put before us sans hot chick. I'm as disappointed as you in the results. But from what I've observed, voters sway back and forth between emphasizing the Douche, and emphasizing the Hott. So it isn't surprising that freaks like Poop sometimes garner the majority vote. Doesn't mean the site has changed. Doesn't mean that baghunters and huntresses have abandoned their principles. It just means that, as will all life's pleasures, a particular genus of Scrote has captured their attention.

At the appropriate point in time the human condition will win out. And by human condition I mean the need to masturbate. The Hotts that have come before, along with their Douchal companions, will be much more compelling to the majority than Poop and his Girl Scout Den Mother, and he will be relegated to his rightful place in the Necroted Closet of Poo.

Now, if he manages to round up some fwappable companionship between now and the end of the year, and DB1 puts that on display come award time, well then, all bets are off, aren't they?
 

ImageWrangler needs a darvocet and a handjob... from a real girl.
 

If you don't vote, you can't complain about the result, that's my motto, and . . . hey -- I just invalidated the rest of what I had to say, dammit.

(Josephine!)
 

Congratulations you glowing son-of-a-bitch. Here's looking forward to you getting viciously teabagged by Smoot in the yearly.
 

Smoot may Teabag, but Crimson Ted will win, as sure as the fresh wounds of a circumcision make the baby scream, "DAMN LEVITES!"
 

For me, it was never a question of whether Jane was hot enough to match Poopa's douche. To me, she looks like a cute normal girl. But I don't think that she is Poopa's love squeeze! Sister maybe, friend or nutritionist slash life-coach. But I saw no sexual relationship there.

Indeed, I see Poopa as an asexual creature; he is really on his own trip. Poopa is not a serious threat to the hottie population. 97% of all women, including Jane, find him repulsive. Alana, Josephine and Charleez would ALL take a big pass on that poop.

In fact, I will go one step FURTHER and say that I don't think Poopa is a real douchebag. For me, the sine qua non of douchebaggery is a remarkably unreflexive way of existence, an all sensory-level party of male grandiosity and entitlement, with very occasional peeks into the raw, wet, pink rage of insecurity and despair that lies at the core--the core which drives this overcompensating behavior in the first place.

But Poopa is a raisin in the sun--a dream deferred so long ago that he lost himself and found himself again: as Poopa, one pretty singular freak of nature. His ego left the building ages ago.

Now, Barrow, Bagpolean and Cheeze, in that order, are the truer threat. With or without their douche gear and styling, they remain good-looking hottie-himbo type guys. If you add on top of that an arrogant mystique-- roid-rage jealousy fits mixed with slam fucking on the bathroom sink--and these bitches are like white on rice. What else do you honestly expect? In most cases, these beautiful, probably stupid and also deeply insecure women have met their match.

And yet, it is still maddening and we must continue to express outrage at the injustice of HCs with DBs. That's why I love this site so much. Long live HCwDB!!!!
 

I cosign everything she said. Word...
 

I've made an executive decision.

Poo, as genius as he is, just ain't a legitimate HCwDB pic. Tanning Bronzer and freakish clownishness, as spectacularly genius as they are, just aren't the true spirit of 'bag. Plus, no hott. As such, I've bumped his fecal cartoonish presence to a well deserved place in the Hall of Scrote and let last week's Runner Up, the more than worthy Flame Broiler and Candy Girl, take his place in the Monthly.


Just sayin'...
 

@Jessica,

You really need to post comments more often here. Like PV1, I renounce all my previous comments in this thread (except the one about Summer's Eve) and just say amen to everything you just said.

Dammit, this site is being taken over by intelligent female 'baghunters and I am loving it.

Bravo!
 

Is that a real person? Sorry I am new here. Never seen anything like that before. Thats not some CGI special effects thing huh? Wow.
 

a huge part of this site is the presence of beautiful women. they may merely be wraiths, images, momentary mistakes; but this is the agreement we have come to.

the girls/women, in their everyday lives may look ordinary. the douchebags may don wrinkled khaki's, unadorned t-shirts, and old sneakers when out of the camera's light.

we judge on the photos presented, and poopa has no hots at his disposal. i applaud the induction into the closet, and mock his monthly victory. it is a glenn beck travesty.
 

Thanks for the compliments, y'all!
 

now that DB1 mentions it, i didn't realize that second-rate Jane was going up against Josephone, Alana, and Charleez. WHOA.

it's like, the combined hotness of Josephine, Alana, and Charleez are almost enough to rival the hotness of the one and only ELIZABETH BANKS.

and that's a pretty scary thought.
 

Re: Jessica's post-

I applaud my fellow baghuntress' comments!
EX-cellent monograph of the Poopster, my sister-in-scrote-mockery.

Hooray for the Closet for Poopaloompa! (I just saw it - Woo-HOO!)
 

Umpa Lumpa your a DB. WTF