What douchebag?
 

second that!
 

Heads or Tails?



Take tails every time.
 

Not A-grade Pear for mine. Too skinny.
 

I was enjoying the gaze at the ass pear when I decided to let my eyes climb the small of her back. Sloping, curving upward did my eyes go, looking for a way to untie that top.....when I noticed some poo running down her shoulder.

Only it wasn't running. It was then I found the choadputz and its unearned dogtag.

And then I wept salty fuccen tears.
 

I believe that tattoo is the Chinese symbol for "Get Some."
 

...or "Jerzy Poo." I can't tell from the angle.
 

"Get Some" is the tat; "Jerzy Poo" is what's written on the dog tags.

B-B-B-Bag To The Bone
 

*PHAFFFFFFFFFFffffffff-spreet!*
 

Holy Wild Kingdom, Merle: this woman is "presenting" like a female baboon in estrus.

But the 90 degree bend in her lumbar spine suggests a different branch of the evolutionary tree altogether. Ouch! I'm guessing she must be a distant relative of platyhelminthes.

As for the thing to her right? I believe that's a Pooskipper, related to the Mudskipper and the ancient Coelacanth. Every time some idiot cries "Get some!" you can count on the Pooskipper to crawl out of the muck using only the muscular nubs of its abdomen, heading straight for the nearest bikini.

Fortunately, Pooskippers die quickly outside of their native slime. You can see from its painfully pinched facial expression that this one is already struggling to breathe, and probably expired shortly after this photo was taken. Ahhh, the Poomanity!
 

If it wasn't for those goddamn Bauhaus artfags and their insistence on contrast in composition, we wouldn't have to concern ourselves with the social ramifications of amoral short-term merchandising-as-religion when viewing this image, we could just rub one out to some primo pear.

Goddamn you László Moholy-Nagy.
 

Ya know... After dreaming about Pocahantas Pear for the last few days, this one doesn't even show up on my radar.
 

She should really get that growth checked out.
 

hey i thought we were supposed to be treated with ass pear delight all by itself after being regaled with the third Stackhouse poem. not ass pear with douchebag and 10 degree hat tilt and douchey tatts and fake dog tags and kissy lips.

you're just like Sergeant Scrote Stain's dad, DB1!

now i'm gonna pout and bawl like an irresponsible baby. Stackhouse's definition of manhood can go stab itself in the head and chest.
 

Scroll to the left removes the bag. If only it was always this easy
 

Sergeant Scrote Stain's dad is my new role model.


Who better/easier to fuck with than young developing minds? My 4 year old will be subject to a never ending mind-fuck designed to toughen him up.

Someday he will thank me. With a cock punch from hell.
 

**clicks on**



I Love Ass Pear… but without Douchebag



**clicks off**
 

@ Vin Douchal

My pops would be proud to hear that he has a fan of his work.

My psychiatrist on the other hand would probably advise you against such actions.
 

I come back for one day, and see that things haven't changed.

Time for another round o' the Mark.

**clink, clink, clink**

glub, glub, glubglub, glubglubglub...


...ssscchhhllluuuuurrppp



Ahhhhhhhhhh.
 

László Moholy-Nagy also presaged the fax, and eventually, the trasmittal of drawings, by email.

Moholy–Nagy dictated his so-called "telephone paintings"' specifications by telephone (a relatively new invention at the time)from Berlin to the foreman of a sign factory. Three paintings were made, each with identical images, but in different sizes. The telephone was a new studio tool that allowed Moholy–Nagy to produce work independent not just of his own hand but of his presence.

So, for fucking up my life which is now largely spent batting emails of drawings around, and for having two names like some issues-riddled divorcee, and for walking around the BauHaus in a big ass Noseratu dress, and for founding IIT, which has a terrible football team, I must second Captain Bringdown's sentiments.
 

Ahh Croosh; back just in time to lay the head stab down on that rabbi's badger-ridden waste of ovarian lining, László Moholy-Nagy.

And, trust me, do NOT scroll down the page and read the Stackhouse Chronicles. Just keep moving forward...
 

No sooner is the DB of the year contest over when new contenders for the crown leap into our consciousness.

The DB is dead, long live the DB.
 

I can't imagine I'm the only one who wants to take a violin string to that glorious spot.
 

i c u loosers are still at it. makin fun a ppl cuz u'll nevr b like em. may b u'll leave your moms basement for new years and get some but i dont think so, hatterz
 

I bet that sway back holds water.
 

@anon 3:40

Stachouse has shown me the way. Know I only be hattin water and head stabbers.

Get some.
 

Farmer Douche is showing off the cream of his recent crop of asspear.
 

one of these two clam holes smells like cocck.... hint, it's the one with the cap
 

@Anon 1:31

Yeah, you're right. Too skinny. I wouldn't hit it if I were you.

You don't mind if I do, though?

@Darksock 3:15

I find him very eloquent, and entertaining. I have often wondered what goes on in the mind of a serial killer.
 

my glass of Guinness left a ring on her back... my cocxxxckesses left a giant cumstain dangling from her right arm
 

Does anyone know where I can GET SOME?
 

Why does he have that confused/1000 yard stare? Oh that's right, he must be GETTING SOME from Stackhouse fist pumping him just outside the frame of the picture.
 

Far inferior to Pocahontas. And her back curvature is scary. Found the tramp stamp, though!

As for yon douchebag, he's got the quasi-kissylips, unearned tags, roided up tatted shoulder & bicep, and if you look closely enough, the GSR. Not to mention the earring and slightly tilted hat.

100% douche.
 

Where's my bourbon?
 

And this is what Db1 is leaving us with for the evening?




I'd say stay tuned for a "Stackhouse After Dark".
 

I'd hit it.
 

The part where the bikini thong disappears and her pear halfs meet...omg I could stare at that all day! ok, ok I have a confession to make, I have been starring at it all day.
 

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I don't know who their tattoo artist is, but he fist-pumps the shit out of some tribal.
 

There is a virtual metanarrative encoded herein that refers to the means whereby her thong got doinked into her buttcrack.

--VS
 

There is a virtual metanarrative encoded herein that refers to the means whereby her thong got doinked into her buttcrack.

--VS
 

(i pushed the button once for each cheek, sorry).

--VS
 

That ass pear tree is begging for some of my wooden puddin'.
 

Hah! I just did a Google search....I'm the first guy on Earth to coin the phrase "wooden puddin'" as a euphemism for human male sperm...I'M OFF TO URBAN DICTIONARY! I'M GONNA BE AS RICH AS RHE GUY THAT INVENTED "MUDHORN"!!!

Oh. Wait.



Ehhh.

Get some.
 

At first glance my manhood pointed me directly to the camelfoot so prevalent...and then in an unexpected turn of events my eyes drifted slightly to the right and I tethered my now scared and scaly penis to my intestines after dry humping my kerosene heater to try and get that douche to quit staring at me!...my wooden puddin' is now hot fudge.

...pass the Makers Croosh...
 

Sorry Darksock, Plinky's mom invented "Wooden Puddin" twenty four years ago while being solicited by three Irish midgets for triple penetration prostitution in south New Jersey.
 

I think its funny that there are complete losers spending their time comenting here when normal people are out having fun with family, parting, and getting some... Real.

LOL!!!
 

"wooden puddin'"

tee hee hee

Mudhorn. Fish tits. Doodie p. Porch beef. I love it here.

GET SOME.
 

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It's a mighty skinny ass pear we have up in this motherfucker tonight. Looks like it's been claimed by a lesser manfaced lamprey baboon. The tribal tattoo identifies this as a member of the highly territorial kissylipsus fuckbucketensis subspecies.

You back away slowly and maintain eye contact, cos that motherfucker will start flinging poo the instant you turn your back.
 

@ Anon 10:27

I see that you have labeled all those who comment on this blog complete losers, the same blog upon which you just commented, thus making you a loser as well.

Why aren't you out with family partying and having fun? You know, getting some, for real. Why waste your time here bantering with a bunch of losers that you've never met? Sounds pretty loserish to me.

Hey, maybe you just finished conversing with Stackhouse and he made you feel fucking retarded. It's okay, he has that effect on a lot of people.

Retard.
 

Nice nipple ring faggot!
 

for fuck's sake, anon 10:27 PM, go kill yourself with a heroin overdose if you're having so much fun.
 

so i just came back from watching The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus. i found it enjoyable, though i'm not sure where i'd put it in my top [insert number here] movies.

at the end of the day, though, i watched the movie mostly for the Vancouver pride. if you're a Vancouverite, you should watch this film. magic happens at the Vancouver Downtown Library, yo. can't remember how many times i've been there back in my university days. really brings back memories looking at how the whole fucking place was filmed.

oh and i'd like to ask our resident architects a particular question: is it okay to build libraries that resemble Roman coliseums?
 

Ok, hunters and huntresses, am I the only one who has TOTALLY FUCKING HAD IT with the GSR? Jesus, I cant wait to get outta '09 and hope that trend goes with it.

On another note, I bet that thong smells like day lillies in the morning sun.

Happy New Year everyone, tag on!

and Fuck Stackhouse.
 

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@ Steve L

Hell, if the Romans can steal from the Greeks, who in turn stole their temple aesthetic from ancient heavy timber construction, then we can damn well pick and choose from their buildings as we please.

In the last 8,000 years there has been only one totally original architectural creation, and that is all those black lava rock Popeyes Chicken restaurants.

After that we all agreed to never again start from scratch.
 

mmmmm... popeyes chicken nuggets drop out of this asspear. they smell like fresh biscuits & tastes like honey. Jeb here makes the rounds of Jenny Craig franchises & eats 5 lbs a day. Jeb likum ass nuggets
 

You can see that woman's back porch, and damn near see the beef thereupon.
 

Quality pear, quality douche.

Get some.
 

I'd hammer that pear, and make the douchetag bag watch in helpless despair.

Yea, I'm a meen one...
 

That's a pretty taut ass and a pretty tight face.